Vengeance not Justice
by alyssacousland
Summary: Awakening Anders makes his way to Kirkwall without Justice and tries to fit in. Follow his journey as he meets different companions along the way. Mostly AU, rated M because Anders and others swear a lot and for obvious sexual/sensual innuendos and situations.
1. Chapter 1

_**The idea behind this fic came to me after I found out that the DA writers had originally thought to merge Justice with Velanna and not with Anders. I'm also constantly inspired by all the great authors who have written great fics! :) **__**This story will sometimes be AU and will sometimes follow the DA2 plot or story line. :D **_

_**I want to especially thank CouslandSpitFire and Eynla for their constant support and suggestions and for helping me with my stupid typos and grammar inconsistencies! :D**_

_**Disclaimer: Bioware owns everything; I just play with the characters! :D**_

Chapter 1

Excerpt from Anders's Journal:

_1__st__ of Firstfall, 9:31 Dragon_

_My gaze happened to fall on Velanna who is so attractive that – Alright, alright. I'll try to write WHY it was that I was looking at her so intently. She had been talking to Justice a lot lately and I could not imagine why Velanna, of all people, was so 'friendly' to him as half the time Justice was scolding her for something._

_I tried avoiding Justice as much as I could. The idea of a Fade spirit suddenly possessing a corpse had really made me rather nervous ever since it had happened back in the Blackmarsh and I had stayed away from him as much as I could. We had talked briefly whenever the Warden-Commander took us somewhere, but every single time he had made me feel guilty. Of course I felt sorry for what mages went through! Of course it made me angry to see my people subjugated and abused! But I really prefer to focus on staying alive at all times, thankyouverymuch and I'm really not keen on fighting templars for the rest of my life if I can help it._

_Things had been looking up these days. I had just returned from giving a lecture at the Circle of Magi. First Enchanter Irving had nearly had a heart attack when he had seen me. I don't think he thought I would ever be serious about anything to be honest._

_While I was there, I discovered my good um…'friend' Karl Thekla had left for Kirkwall. I was a bit sorry to hear about this since we had had fun while he and I were both at the Circle in Ferelden. I decided to write to him, just to ask him how he was doing and then hurried to pack my belongings for the trip back to Vigil's Keep, securing Ser Pounce-a-lot in my backpack after assuring him that we would soon be back home and that everything would be alright._

_When we got back to the Keep two weeks later, I discovered everything was not at all alright as I had thought. The first thing that did not sit well with me was the fact that the Warden-Commander was leaving and another Warden-Commander was coming in from Orlais to take her place. The day she got us all together and informed us was a lamentable day indeed._

"_I'm sure King Alistair can manage without you," I said, slightly stunned by her announcement. "He has managed to do fine so far!"_

"_Anders, I __**am**__ married to him. My place is really at court, by his side," Leila replied, a smile on her lovely face. "I just want to tell you all that you are welcome there if you ever decide to visit…"_

"_Ah, yes, the old ball and chain," I sighed. There was a sudden crash in the room and I closed my eyes, annoyed that Oghren would choose this moment to pass out._

_"Return to your duties and get a good night's sleep. The new Warden-Commander will be arriving tomorrow," Leila said as she hurried to help Oghren up. "Nathaniel, could you help me with Oghren, please?" _

_Nathaniel nodded with a smile and even Justice stepped up to help carry Oghren back to his room. As for me, I couldn't shake the feeling that things would be VERY different from now on. I was unpleasantly surprised to see that this would be the case in the days to come._

_The new Warden-Commander __seemed__ like a nice person, even though he had a vacant stare and seemed to be lost in thought most of the time. I successfully managed to make him scowl at me only because I took Ser Pounce-a-lot everywhere. I didn't care much if it bothered the new Warden-Commander or not. If he didn't like cats, he was off my Satinalia gift list. When the time came to say goodbye to OUR Warden-Commander, I couldn't help but feel it was the beginning of the end of my time with the Wardens._

_Once she was gone, the new Warden-Commander took us all underground to check that the doors to the Deep Roads were still tightly shut, while Voldrik Glavonak glared at him as he darkly muttered that Dwarven mechanisms lasted far longer than __the Warden-Commander__ knew. The Warden-Commander, oblivious to all this, clapped his hands and ordered everyone back up to the surface happily. He stopped for a moment when I cooed at Ser Pounce-a-lot and frowned._

"_I thought I told you to get rid of that cat, mage," he drawled crossly._

"_I thought I told you I wouldn't," I replied cheekily._

_His frown deepened and I smiled at him, even though I knew it would only make matters worse._

"_This cat makes you too soft. We need strong battlemages to fight the darkspawn," he said as he shook his head._

_I said nothing, but batted my eyelashes at him and blew him a kiss, which I knew would probably make him retreat quickly. I laughed when he did, overjoyed that I was not wrong and that I was finally free of him. I practically skipped to my room. Once there, I petted Ser Pounce-a-lot and settled down for the night._

_The following day I received a letter from Karl. After I read it I decided I would never ever visit Kirkwall if I could help it. I felt sorry that Karl was there - the Circle in Kirkwall was a prison according to him. And I thought the Circle in Ferelden was bad! At least we had fun with each other in the dark corners there! _

_I smiled fondly at the memories as the Warden-Commander droned on and on about our duties. He sent Nate to do Maker knows what in Amaranthine and I was stuck with Oghren and his schleets, while Sigrun went off to train recruits that had arrived from Orlais with the Warden-Commander._

_Things got worse a week later. We had just returned from gathering Darkspawn blood with two new Fereldan recruits when there was a disturbance at the doors and a regiment of templars walked in._

_Well, not a regiment, but FIVE! And Maker knows one templar is enough!_

"_Warden-Commander," one of the templars said as he saluted the Orlesian pansy…um…Warden-Commander. "We came as quickly as we could."_

_Not liking this one bit._

"_Please, stay close to the mages and make sure that everything is in order," the Warden-Commander said as I tried to lift my jaw from the floor._

"_You're assigning templars to guard us?" I finally managed to say without shouting as I glanced at Velanna knowing her reaction wouldn't be pretty. She was bristling slightly and I noticed her eyes flashing blue, but thought it was my over-active imagination._

"_Think nothing of it. Magic is dangerous, and must be controlled. You must not cast spells unless you are facing the Darkspawn," the Warden-Commander said firmly and then shrugged._

_As soon as he had said those words, Velanna changed and I was struck dumb when her skin seemed to crack open and blue light filtered through the cracks. She slammed her staff on the floor and I decided to do something really smart for a change - something that I was really good at. _

_I ran._

_Arriving breathless at my room, I flung my door open. Grabbing Ser Pounce-a-lot hurriedly, I put him in my pack along with whatever I could then slipped out rushing to get to the courtyard. I hid in the corridors along the way, and finally managed to get outside after what seemed like an eternity. As soon as I stepped into the courtyard I stumbled and nearly fell. The body of Kristoff was lying motionless on the ground. I didn't have time to figure out what that meant and raced to Amaranthine, without looking back. Once there, I ran into Nate. In a flash of inspiration I thought about Ser Pounce-a-lot and his love for Nathaniel Howe. I also knew Nate cared about the cat. I was looking at an uncertain future at the moment, and really didn't know where life would take me next. I could even – Maker forbid – end up dead and who would take care of Pounce? I also knew that Nate would take good care of him. _

"_Anders!"_

"_No time to explain," I wheezed as I tried to catch my breath. I grabbed Ser Pounce-a-lot from my pack and handed him over to a confused and slightly shocked Nathaniel. "Take care of him, will you? He hates ships…"_

"_But, where are you going?" Nate started to protest, as Pounce licked his face and purred. I petted him one last time, and Pounce stared at me with affection. And then – I can't explain how or why – I knew that Pounce would be alright. _

"_Never mind that! Just take care of my cat!" I yelled, already running to the docks. _

_I soon found myself surrounded by several large crates that hid me from Nate and I saw that one of the ships was ready to leave, so I ran up to it pausing on the deck for a moment to wheeze a little at the Captain who regarded me curiously._

"_How much for safe passage to wherever it is you're going?" I finally asked as I remembered that I had a little over five silvers in my coin purse. I didn't want to dwindle on this, but my mind was already seeking a solution to the problem. _

"_We are going to Kirkwall in the Free Marshes. This trip will _not_ be cheap," the man scowled._

_I frowned and my hand automatically flew to my ear while I fingered the gold earring the Warden-Commander had given me six months ago. I quickly took it off and offered it to the Captain._

_"Will this cover it?" I asked as he looked at the earring and then bit it to make sure it was real gold.__  
_

"_I see you are wearing another one too. If you also give it to me, I'll give you the name of a contact of mine in Kirkwall that will help you once we arrive. I'll even send a note to her before we dock, so that she knows you will be meeting her," the captain said, eyeing my other earring greedily._

"_Deal," I said as I handed him the other one, then walked to the other side of the ship, my heart still hammering in my chest as I looked at the sea while I gripped the rails tightly._

_I didn't look back at what I had just done, nor think about it at all. The only thing that was keeping me from enjoying all this was the fact that I had had to give up my cat._

…

Anders closed his journal, congratulating himself once again on his writing style. It looked like he was writing a story – his life story – and anyone who read it would probably be delighted with his storytelling skills. Then he sighed as the memory of Velanna glowing blue came to his mind, wondering what that had been about. He shrugged it away as some kind of weird Dalish spell he had never seen before and stashed his journal away in his backpack. The ship had docked and it was time to start his new life in Kirkwall.

He quickly climbed up the stairs to the deck then made his way off the ship and into the crowds of people walking around the docks. He took a deep breath – his first breath of freedom – and ended up coughing and gagging slightly. The whole place smelled of fish and unwashed bodies. He looked at the piece of paper that the Captain had given him and thought about asking for directions, but quickly decided against that when he saw a templar heading his way. He made a mad dash into an alley and found himself face to face with a lovely woman who blinked back at him and giggled holding a hand to her mouth. He smiled inwardly and decided he would ask her for directions. If anything else happened after he flirted with her, then that was good too.

"Milady, I'm so sorry. I wasn't looking at where I was going," he said in a low voice, a twinkle in his brown eyes. "I'm a bit lost and needed to find my way to…" he glanced at the bit of paper he had in his hand, and then looked up smiling. "…to Lowtown - specifically to Lirene's Fereldan Imports?"

The woman smiled and he saw she had two missing front teeth. He was taken aback, but managed to conceal his surprise under what he hoped looked like a charming smile as he waited patiently for the directions that would take him to his destination. Even though she was lovely, the missing teeth made him nervous and he could not shake the image of a jealous husband wanting to kill him if he dared pursue the lovely lady in front of him. He decided it would be extremely unwise to make enemies so soon.

"You have to go up the stairs there!" She pointed behind her. "That will take you to Lowtown. I don't know where that place is, but it should be in the Lowtown market."

His smile deepened and he thanked her profusely by stooping down and planting a gentle kiss on the back of her hand. The woman dissolved into giggles and he made his leave with a smirk and a wink, heading towards the stairs immediately. He still had a smile on his face when he started to climb the steps, finally arriving to Lowtown a few moments later. He made a left turn, spying a stall of some kind against a wall and walked towards it, jumping slightly when a rat dashed over his boots. He frowned and made a mental note to get another cat as soon as possible.

He walked around stopping for a few moments to admire some staffs on sale at one of the stalls. He shook his head when the merchant asked him if there was anything he wanted and turned, finally catching sight of a metal door with the number 4 painted on it and looked down at the piece of paper in his hands to confirm it was the right place. Upon reaching the door he opened it and stepped inside. There were a lot of people crying and complaining in the small place and he quickly discovered they were all Fereldan refugees, who wanted a decent job and a roof over their heads. He made his way to a brunette who was standing behind a counter and smiled.

"My name is Anders. Captain Rickshaw sent me," Anders said with a grin. "He said you'd be able to help me?"

Lirene looked him over and didn't smile, and Anders felt his heart sinking, thinking she would turn him away. He didn't have a silver or copper on him and doubted that he would be able to find anywhere decent to sleep, let alone a good meal to quiet his now growling stomach.

She motioned him to follow and led him to a back room. Pointing at a wooden chair in front of a table she asked him to sit. "What is it that you can do? Captain Rickshaw said in his letter that you were a mage and a healer. Is this true?"

Anders nodded. "Yes...healing is my specialty, My Lady. Though I could dance for you too if you'd like…" he winked, a lopsided grin on his face.

"Maker have mercy - no thanks!" the lady exclaimed then gave him a small smile. "I'll have dinner on the table soon, and we'll eat. Then I'll call Darwin to take you to the place - an old abandoned warehouse in Darktown. It isn't pretty, but if you set up a clinic in it for Ferelden refugees, I won't take any coin from you and leave you alone. There aren't any templars around there and as soon as the people know what you are doing, they'll guard you well enough, I suppose. There's a back room there where you can sleep as well. What do you say?"

Anders smiled at her and his brown eyes twinkled. "I say yes to everything you've just said. But to tell you the truth, I can only think of dinner right now – I'm starving!"

…

Even though the warehouse was actually in the sewers, Anders thought it was lucky that he had a place to live in and he liked to heal people who needed it. He soon found out that the refugees were desperate and not only suffered from physical wounds because they would often just stop by to ask for advice or to tell him their problems. He listened to them and comforted them whenever he could. He took pride in his work and managed to bring a smile to their faces and hope to their hearts. After only three days, he was not only healing Fereldans, but Free Marchers as well.

Lirene would drop off food for him once a day, and his patients' families – the ones that had a bit of coin – would often bring him homemade pies if they could. Anders did not take their coin for healing them, even though he needed the money. He could not bring himself to do so, as the people he generally healed were very poor. Sometimes he even shared his food with the less fortunate ones.

He also discovered everything that was going on in Kirkwall just by listening to their conversations. Soon, he managed to write his first letter to Karl and one of the boys he had healed ran to the Gallows and managed to deliver it without being seen by the templars. A few days later, he received a reply and it depressed him even more when he discovered that the templars in Kirkwall were more abusive than the ones in Ferelden had ever been. He wanted desperately to help his friend, but did not know how to manage that, and left well enough alone for the time being.

Merely a week after he had opened the clinic, he heard that a group of Grey Wardens had arrived to the city. He immediately panicked and thought about what he could do in case they were in Kirkwall looking for him. They were staying at an inn in Hightown, so he decided to see for himself what they were up to and locked his clinic one night taking the stairs that led him to Lowtown.

He hadn't been in Lowtown since he arrived, so in the darkness the streets looked pretty much the same to him. He tried to find the stairs that would take him to Hightown, but after wandering around for nearly half an hour he realized to his dismay that he was lost. At that moment, half a dozen men in masks appeared in front of them, holding up bows and aiming their arrows directly at him.

Anders froze for a moment, then chuckled, which made one of men slide closer to him.

"What's so funny, eh?" The bandit snarled.

"I haven't got a copper on me," Anders grinned.

"You've a staff that will fetch a pretty price, good robes and a nice pair of boots," the man replied and Anders's smile vanished.

"Really? My robes are falling to pieces, and one of my boots is held together with bandages. Also, I don't think you want to mess with a mage," Anders countered, as he reached into the Veil for an ice spell that would do the trick.

The man made a terrible mistake and turned to one of his companions to make fun of what Anders was saying. Anders grinned and cast a Cone of Cold on the three that were standing directly in front of him, freezing them solid, while he unsheathed his staff and immediately flung an electricity bolt on the others and smirked as they jerked around before also freezing them in place.

A figure suddenly appeared from the shadows and slashed at the men who were nearest to him, then disappeared from view, but not before Anders had a glimpse of golden jewelry and a flash of white. Soon all the men lay on the cobble-stoned ground dead at his feet and a woman with long shapely legs wearing a pair of leather boots and a white tunic that barely covered her panties stood defiantly in front of him flashing her daggers, a smile playing on her lips. A blue handkerchief held her dark hair back and he saw that she was pretty, but her breasts were absolutely fabulous.

"A vision of beauty or a desire demon coming to my rescue?" he flirted in dulcet tones, lowering his voice an octave.

"I see you think you're good at flirting," the woman said as she sheathed her daggers. "I don't have time for this right now. I'm supposed to meet someone at The Hanged Man and I'm already late as it is."

"The Hanged Man?" Anders asked curiously. "An inn or tavern, no doubt?"

"You're new around here, aren't you?" she gave him a smile and looked him up and down, her eyes narrowing slightly. "Do I know you from somewhere?"

"Hmmm. I don't know? Maybe?" Anders replied, his brow furrowing.

"You're Fereldan, aren't you? I can tell because of your accent. My name is Isabela," she added. "It was fun to save your life, but I'm already late…"

"Save my life?" Anders chuckled, and Isabela frowned. "I _think_ I had everything under control."

She shrugged and walked away towards a door and Anders followed her, the sound of singing and shouting coming from the other side.

Isabela rolled her eyes and turned back to face him. "Don't tell me you're going to follow me around like a lost puppy now."

"Alright. I won't," Anders shot back at her. "How would you like to make some coin?"

She raised an eyebrow and her lips curved slightly upwards. "So you aren't such an idiot after all! Sorry, sweet thing, but like I said, I've other plans. Besides, I can tell you haven't got a copper on you, so no thanks."

"Oh, I don't have coin, that's true. But the people I want to…er…'pay a visit to' will probably have coin. Lots of it, I'm sure," Anders smiled ignoring the fact that he had just been called an idiot. He had been called worse things before so he just let it slide.

"You're _sure_? Are you trying to convince me or yourself?" Isabela chuckled. Then after a moment of silence she burst out laughing. "Now I remember! Were you ever at 'The Pearl' in Ferelden?"

"Oh! _That's_ where I know you from! You were there that night I tried my electricity trick, right?"

"That was nice," Isabela smirked. "Alright. What are you up to, sweet thing? I'll help you out."

"Splendid," Anders retorted with a grin. "I can tell we're going to be the best of friends."

…


	2. Chapter 2

_**Thanks SO much Morninglight, CouslandSpitFire, Eynla, Shinkshinkshink and koguma for your wonderful reviews! I also want to thank those of you who have put this fic in your favorites and are now following it! It makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside! :D Special thanks to my good friend and beta CouslandSpitFire and my friend Eynla for your support and suggestions! :D **_

_**Another chapter full of Anders's antics and silly ideas! I love my goofy Anders! :D Reviews are most welcome, I love reading your feedback! Next chapter, Hawke makes a dramatic entrance! Or not! Haha!**_

_**Bioware owns! :D **_

Chapter 2

They both bent down to loot one of the bodies at their feet at the same time and nearly hit each other's heads. Anders frowned and quickly advanced to the next one after finding only a pair of torn trousers in the bandit's pack. However, Isabela had already looted that bandit and the next one as well. Anders looked at her darkly when she was done.

"Oh, please! Continue looking at me like that, Serah, and you'll be on your own!" Isabela smirked. "You have to be quick and nimble to catch up with me."

"Oh, I like to take my time, when…and _if_…the moment is right," Anders purred as he walked up to her. "Fast isn't really fun if you want to…._explore_." He grinned when he saw Isabela's right eyebrow shoot up.

"Oooh, I like you already," Isabela said in a sultry voice. "I'll take the lead. Where are we going?"

"An inn in Hightown called 'The Quick Stallion'," Anders supplied.

"I know exactly where that is," Isabela smiled. "Right around the corner from my favorite place in Kirkwall as a matter of fact. Let's go, sweet thing."

Anders followed her and soon they were climbing the stone stairs that led to Hightown.

…

"'The Blooming Rose'," Anders read the sign in front of him.

"That's right," Isabela retorted as she continued walking. "That's my favorite place in Kirkwall. The inn we're going to is just around this corner. Ah! There it is!" she pointed right in front of her.

"We should remain hidden as much as we can. If they are sitting in the main room of the inn, I want to be able to eavesdrop on their conversation. Is there a back door?" Anders asked as he crept behind Isabela, admiring her shapely arse.

"There is always a back door for everything," Isabela smirked.

"So true, that…" Anders quipped. His eyes suddenly made out a wooden door at the side of a wall and he gestured to it. Isabela smiled back at him as she nodded.

"Yes, I believe this is where we want to go. Since you want to be stealthy, you should crouch as low as you can once we're inside. I can blend into the shadows easily. It's a real shame you're a mage…"

"Hmmm," Anders frowned. "I've thought the exact same thing. After seven escape attempts from the Circle, I was hoping to become more of a rogue, but it looks like I'm stuck with 'mage'…" he sighed dramatically.

"Shh! " Isabela warned as she opened the door a crack, slipping inside without looking back.

Anders crouched low and advanced quickly, shutting the door behind him silently. He was absolutely still as he identified the noises that reached his ears. Music and laughter - as well as loud voices - told him that a large group of people were drinking in the main area where the innkeeper was. He just had to find out if the Wardens were there or in their rooms. While he was at it, he'd listen in to their conversations to see what they were up to.

"What kind of people are we looking for?" came Isabela's disembodied voice from somewhere on his right. "Mages? Templars?"

"I'll know it when I see them," he whispered back, advancing slowly to the far end of the corridor to catch a glimpse of the main room.

"That's informative," Isabela's whisper floated up to him. He smiled as he inched forward.

When he reached the end of the corridor, he took a peek. At a first glance, he couldn't see anything but people dressed in noble clothes or armor. The smell of ale and cheap liquor reached his nostrils. _I should get a drink after this. I deserve it._ His eyes continued to scan the whole room, and he finally saw a group of four Wardens sitting at a table right next to the main entrance. He was too far for them to sense him, but not far enough for him to tell that they were wearing distinctive blue-striped Warden Armor. His eyes narrowed slightly as he fixed his gaze on each one trying to make out any details. If there was a high-ranking officer with them, he would be able to recognize him by the crest on the armor.

Isabela elbowed him and he had to bite back a grunt.

"What are you doing that for?" he complained as he turned back to her.

"Do you see anyone you know?" Isabela hissed.

"No. Nobody I know," he said and suddenly he smirked – knowing exactly what had to be done. "I have a favor to ask you though."

"A favor?" Isabela frowned. "You mean I have to do something else for you?"

"I'm sure you'll enjoy it," he shot back at her. "I need you to first ask the innkeeper what room the Wardens are staying at. Then I want you to get close to –"

"Wait a minute!" Isabela protested audibly. "We're looking for Wardens, as in 'Grey Wardens'?"

"Yes. They don't know me, but I can't get close or they will…'sense' me," he said quickly. "It's a Warden thing. You, on the other hand, could serve as a distraction and possibly eavesdrop why they are here…"

"You're kidding right?" Isabela replied, disbelief written all over her face. "I don't mess with Wardens!"

"I need to know if they have come to Kirkwall because they're looking for me," Anders hurried to explain.

Isabela's jaw hit the floor. "You? _You're_ a Grey Warden?"

"Unfortunately," Anders replied with a frown. "I used to be proud of that, but not anymore. I ran away from Vigil's Keep in Amaranthine because I had a falling out with the Warden-Commander there…The idiot brought Templars into the Keep to control us and I had to leave –"

"This just keeps getting better and better," Isabela interrupted, looking up at Anders's face with a hint of annoyance on hers.

He had a sad look of desperation on his face – not unlike an animal silently waiting to be slaughtered - and looked so vulnerable at that moment that Isabela sighed, shaking her head. "Ok, I know I'm going to regret this forever, but…I have an idea on what we can do to keep them from noticing you." Anders looked so relieved that she had to smile. "But you're going to owe me big time for this, I warn you!"

"I'll do anything you want me to, I promise," Anders nodded, his eyes twinkling.

Isabela smirked at this. "Looks like we're both on the same page, then."

"Oh, I keep all my promises. You won't regret it, you'll see…"

Isabela's response to this was to roll her eyes.

"Here's what I think we should do, but only if you are sure you can handle the innkeeper because you are going to have to invent a reason why you need to go to their room," Isabela said. "In other words, you'll need to lie."

"Oh, I already have one, not to worry!" Anders chuckled. "And I can lie easily if I need to, I assure you."

"Then go to the innkeeper and get that room number. As soon as you do, come back here and wait for me. Once I see you aren't around, I'll slip away from them and join you. Then we can both head into the room together."

"That's a great plan," Anders agreed. "I like it better than mine."

"Sweet thing," Isabela sighed. "_Any_ plan is better than yours…"

…

Anders walked to the counter and smiled at the innkeeper, just as Isabela made her way through the crowd of drinking and laughing patrons towards the Wardens at the table. The innkeeper smiled back.

"What can I get you, Serah?"

He produced an envelope with the Grey Warden seal from his pocket, which actually was a copy of orders that the new Warden-Commander had given everyone before the Templars had arrived at Vigil's Keep, so Anders had never broken the seal. "I've got a missive for the Grey Wardens, specifically for the Warden leading the group here in Kirkwall," he said in a business-like tone.

"The Warden leading the group is in their suite, Sire," the innkeeper rattled off, his eyes glancing at the Grey Warden seal on the envelope. "He said he was retiring for the evening, and should not be disturbed. May I deliver it to him tomorrow morning?"

"I'm afraid that won't do," Anders frowned. "…I was told to deliver the missive directly to him…"

"I'm sorry, Serah, but I have my orders as well," the innkeeper replied.

Anders looked at him sternly, without saying anything for a while. The innkeeper started to fidget and lowered his gaze shaking his head. "Do you know you are signing my death warrant?" Anders finally whispered melodramatically, his eyes now pleading as they fixed themselves on the innkeeper's.

The innkeeper's eyes widened slightly. "Serah?" he asked in alarm.

Anders nodded, a pout forming on his lips. "Aye. They will keep me in one of their dungeons on bread and water before my head rolls…" he sighed. "Don't you know what the Wardens are capable of? Haven't you heard the stories?"

The innkeeper swallowed, his hand flying to his neck, as Anders fixed an eerie stare on him. He suddenly grabbed the innkeeper's collar and pulled him slightly towards him. "But _you_, Serah…" Anders's lower lip wobbled - his eyes moist with unshed tears. "…_you_ can help me! _You_ can become my savior! My hero! All I need is the room number and I'll slip this envelope under the door. I give you my word I will _not _disturb him!"

"Room 7, Serah! Just up the stairs to the right!" the innkeeper hurried to say.

Anders's eyes filled with hope and extreme elation, releasing the innkeeper at once. He caught the poor man's hand in his, giving it a squeeze and shake.

"Serah! I don't know how to thank you enough! Because of you, I will live to see another day!" he grinned, relief written all over his face. He bowed low, grabbing the envelope and stuffing it back into his pocket. He was still thanking him when he turned and walked back into the dark corridor.

He already knew where the stairs were, having caught a glimpse of them when he and Isabela had first walked in through the back door, so he waited for her patiently in the corridor with a triumphant smile on his face.

…

Anders felt invincible, like there wasn't a problem in Thedas he couldn't solve. Leaning back, he drained his third tankard of ale, his warm, brown eyes holding Isabela's for a split second. He waited for her to turn away and studied her as she drained her tankard, noting that her body was probably one of the most attractive female bodies he had seen in a while. Smiling into his tankard he knew that she only wanted some fun, and would not demand a relationship if he bedded her – something that made her even more appealing to him.

He was now two sovereigns richer than he had been before and had a map of the Deep Roads in his backpack. He had nicked it because it might help him if he ever had to escape a group of templars. The templars hardly ever followed people into the Deep Roads if they could help it. Also, if anyone ever needed a map with entrances to the Deep Roads, he could sell the blasted thing and get some coin for it. He really hadn't the slightest idea why he had taken it, but the map was now lying at the bottom of his backpack and he was feeling gloriously relieved because the Wardens hadn't been looking for him after all. They were planning an expedition into the blasted Deep Roads.

That was one of the things he would _never _miss about not being with the Wardens any more. He hated the bloody Deep Roads.

For a split second he remembered how he had acquired the map. The sleeping Senior Warden was someone Anders knew and he had bitten his lip to keep the expletive from bubbling out when the man had turned over while he lay sleeping and Anders had caught a glimpse of his face. The Warden's name was Stroud. Anders had saved his life on one of his journeys into the Deep Roads with a pair of recruits. It was good to know that he now led a group of Wardens, since back then he had struck Anders as a serious, stern type, eager to climb the ranks. His eyes had fallen on a piece of paper on the table near the bed, which he clearly identified as a map. The next thing he knew, he had stuffed the document into his pack without thinking twice.

Isabela suddenly materialized on his lap with a half-smile on her face, interrupting his thoughts.

"How about fulfilling your promise, sweet thing?" she purred. "I'm ready for some sparkles…"

Anders smiled seductively at her, but before he could respond, she tilted her face and captured his lips in her own, kissing him hungrily. He kissed her back with equal intensity, his hands traveling down her back, one of them settling on her right thigh and working its way under her tunic and to her panties.

"I have a room upstairs," Isabela crooned into his mouth. "Follow me."

He followed her up the stairs of the tavern, and a dwarf with fantastic chest hair stopped them on the landing. Anders's eyes briefly rested on the dwarf's earrings and he felt a pang of jealousy as he sadly remembered he had had to part with his own to escape the Wardens in Amaranthine.

"Rivaini," the dwarf announced crossing his arms and staring up at her. "I thought our appointment was an hour ago?"

"Ah, yes…about that…," Isabela said then chuckled as Anders slid his hand up her arse, the sparks flying from his fingers. "I got….distracted…"

"I can see that," the dwarf nodded. "I thought you wanted to deal with the man and get it over with? Then maybe you could really relax with your companion here, without a cloud of responsibility hanging over your head?"

"Aww, Varric, don't get angry. I'm here, aren't I?" Isabela purred.

"Let's hope my contact is still around," Varric replied, and then grinned up at Anders, holding out his hand. "Varric Tethras, at your service."

Anders grinned and shook his hand. "Anders, apostate mage," he slurred, feeling a little tipsy. "Who is this person you have to meet, Isabela? Can I come too?" he turned to Isabela who nodded.

"I'm sure your contact is still there, Varric. He's at The Blooming Rose after all," Isabela smiled.

"Knowing how punctual you are, I'm hoping he's having a little fun while he's waiting for us at least," Varric quipped.

"The Blooming Rose?" Anders echoed thoughtfully. "Isn't that the place we passed to get to the tavern we were going to?"

"Yes. My favorite place in Kirkwall," Isabela sighed fondly. "It's a brothel."

"A brothel? I like this already," Anders laughed.

"Sorry to have interrupted you, by the way," Varric murmured to Anders.

"Apology accepted," Anders grinned, deciding he really liked Varric. "But you'll have to buy me a drink when we get back."

"We'll see about that," Varric replied with a smile. "How good are you at Diamondback?"

…


	3. Chapter 3

_**Wow! Thanks so much Eynla, koguma, BlessedArrow, Morninglight, Graymalkyn, CouslandSpitFire and Anon for your awesome reviews! Special thanks to my beta friends CouslandSpitFire and Eynla for their support and suggestions! A huge thanks to all of you who have put this fic on their list of favorites and who are now following it! Cookies for everyone! :D **_

_**There is a scene after the beginning of this chapter with mature content in it, so it's NSFW! Just thought I'd give you all a heads up, though you probably already know since it's kind of hinted at in Chapter 2! :D **_

_**A word to describe my female Hawke: Whirlwind! **_

_**Enjoy! **_

_**As usual my disclaimer: Bioware owns everything! **_

Chapter 3

They arrived at the Blooming Rose and Madame Lusine actually met them at the door. She looked at Anders up and down with a smile on her face.

"Let me know if you're looking for work, handsome," she said in a sultry voice, then turned to talk to one of the girls. Anders's eyebrows shot upwards and his eyes widened slightly. Then he burst out laughing.

"And they don't even know about the electricity thing!" Isabela smirked.

"Electricity thing?" Varric echoed curiously and then shook his head when he saw Isabela and Anders exchange a look. "Never mind – I don't want to know."

They advanced into the main room, Anders giggling manically as he grasped Isabela's arse and squeezed it once. She gave a squeal of delight and hurried behind Varric, while Anders surveyed the room with interest. He was still a little tipsy, but not so tipsy to keep him from admiring the whores on display. There were elven girls in lovely tight bodices and shapely human women too. He spotted a handsome-looking guy that winked at him and Anders winked back, a lopsided grin on his face.

"Ah! There's Farcal over there," Varric said, pointing to a dwarf sitting at a table next to the stairs. As Isabela and Varric made their way over to Farcal, Anders turned left to head up the stairs. He just wanted to take a look at one of the empty rooms. Just then, a beautiful young woman with dark hair who was coming down the stairs burst out laughing at something her companion was saying. She tilted her head to look up at him as she reached the landing, turning around suddenly with a smile on her face and accidentally bumping into Anders.

"Oh! Excuse me, Serah!" She exclaimed happily, looking up at him.

Anders opened his mouth to say it was alright, but he got a good look at her and his mouth dropped open.

She had the most delicate features he had ever seen: Full lips, curled up in the sweetest smile and a lovely delicate nose that turned up slightly at the end. Her almond-shaped eyes were bright violet and her dark lashes were very long. Her skin was a pearly white, but her cheeks were pink, probably because she was laughing and a little drunk, Anders guessed. His eyes traveled all the way down to her chest. Even though she was wearing some kind of leather armor, he could see that her breasts were large and straining to be free. He felt his cock spring up attentively and his eyes widened slightly.

He tried talking to her, but discovered to his dismay that he was struck speechless. He just could not utter a single word.

The girl shrugged and turned back to her companion, giggling at him as he led her down the stairs and away to another table far across the room where they ordered something to drink.

Anders stood there, enthralled, still staring at the lovely creature. Varric suddenly elbowed him and he turned back to look at him with a dazed expression on his face.

"Blondie, wake up!"

"Aww, he saw something he likes! Let him be!" Isabela laughed, standing next to Anders and winking at him.

"That _could_ be a potential problem," Varric said. "That girl isn't a whore."

"Ah! I see Lucky has just arrived and is talking to Farcal. That can only mean that Farcal is telling him about the job," Isabela smiled. "I'll just go hire Lucky once and for all so we can leave."

"You know this girl?" Anders asked Varric as Isabela walked down the stairs over to Farcal's table to talk to Lucky.

"Well, not exactly. I _have _heard of her though. She arrived from Ferelden about a year ago and works with Athenril," Varric explained. "Her sister works with her, too."

"Who's Athenril?" Anders asked.

"She leads one of the smaller circle of thieves and smugglers in Kirkwall," Varric replied just as Isabela returned with a smile on her face.

"Let's go, sweet thing," Isabela purred into Anders's ear. "I want my sparkles like you promised, remember?"

Anders pulled himself together. "Of course, Isabela. Let's get back to The Hanged Man," he smiled.

When they turned to walk to the entrance, he glanced at the table where the young woman had been sitting, but it was empty. He looked around for her rather frantically, but he could not find her.

She was gone.

…

"What other spells do you know besides the 'sleeping spell' you used on that Warden?" Isabela crooned at him, a half-smile on her face as she straddled him on the bed.

"What do you mean, sweetheart?" Anders asked innocently, hissing a few moments later when she took his arousal in her hand and squeezed slightly. She straightened up above him and discarded her white tunic. Her breasts were a sight to see and looked absolutely fabulous. Anders hummed appreciatively, his hands reaching out and massaging them gently.

"You know what I mean…I saw you flicking your hand at him when he tossed around on the bed. I know you put a sleeping spell on him so he wouldn't wake up. What I want to know is if you can cast a spell that can…keep us… _awake_ all night…" Isabela's hand was now pumping him and he was having a hard time controlling himself. It had been a while since he'd had sex.

"Oh…" he managed to breathe out. "I think I may know a spell or two that would…ah!" he cried and grabbed her hand, then pulled her down, kissing her passionately. Reaching through the Veil, he focused on the sparks she had been asking for and started to caress her. He sat up and swung her around, kneeling on the bed behind her, then forced her on her knees. One of his hands fondled her breasts and tweaked her nipples and the other one caressed her arse. When his hand reached her nub, she was soaking wet and Anders smiled.

Bending over her, he let his throbbing cock slide over her back, then graze her nub, but did not make a move to enter her yet.

"As a mage I'll make this a night to remember…as a Grey Warden, I'll last longer than any other…" he whispered, trailing light kisses from the nape of her neck down her back between her shoulders.

"That's what I'm hoping for, Sparkles," Isabela managed to say, leaning back and rubbing against him.

…

Anders smirked as he looked down at Isabela who was fast asleep, then got up and hurried to get dressed. The sun was already rising when he walked down the stairs of The Hanged Man and stopped at the counter.

"How much for a hot bath?" Anders asked Corff.

"Ten silver, Serah," Corff replied.

"How much for a hot bath today and a hot bath every day at nightfall?" Anders asked again smiling at the bartender.

"Ten silver for the first bath, five silver afterwards for each one,"

"No discount? Not even if I come in and get drinks, too?" Anders replied, arching an eyebrow.

"Fine!" Corff finally relented. "Five silvers for each bath – this first one is free of charge. But you will have to pay in advance, Serah."

"You've got yourself a deal," Anders grinned as he gave Corff a sovereign and waited for his change. He had more than enough to get some ingredients for his potions right after his bath, and would still have more than a sovereign left. Smiling, he went back up the stairs and down the corridor, turning right at the very end. Opening the door, he found himself in the back part of the inn. A large copper tub was in the middle of the room, and there were towel racks all around.

Anders ignored the racks and opened his backpack, extracting a jar of salve and a towel from it. He smiled at the girl filling the tub with buckets of water and asked her to leave once she was done, then undressed. He put some of the contents from the jar in the bath water and used magic to heat the water. The salve was a special concoction he made from different herbs that cured most – if not all – sexually transmitted diseases. While he had enjoyed his night of passion with Isabela, he was not stupid.

When his bath was ready, he sank into the hot water and lay there for a few moments, savoring the heat and relaxing while he waited for the salve to do its magic. The vision of the beautiful creature he had run into at The Blooming Rose suddenly popped into his head. He shook his head, but try as he might, could not stop thinking about her. His found himself sexually aroused again and he groaned.

Leaning over with a frown, he grabbed his backpack and took out a bar of lemon soap. He then proceeded to wash himself thoroughly and vigorously, forcing himself to think about the ingredients he needed to buy for his potions and salves. Once he was done, he dried himself and got dressed.

By the time he left The Hanged Man, it was almost noon. His stomach grumbled and he stopped at one of the food stands in the market to buy some ham, cheese and fresh bread. Then he made his way to the lady who sold potions and ingredients, deep in thought.

He focused on the vendor's different herbs and roots, hardly paying attention to anything else. After a while, he found some much needed embrium for some of his potions and a number of hard to get roots for his salves. As he was about to pay, he walked straight into a person who was talking to the lady merchant and laughing, causing the different plants and roots he was holding in his hands to fall to the floor.

"Oh! I'm so sorry!" A female voice hurried to say. "Let me help you…"

He looked directly at the woman to protest and say that he would take care of it, but was surprised to discover it was the dark-haired beauty he had seen in The Blooming Rose the night before. She stopped talking and tilted her head, a confused look on her face.

"Do I know you from somewhere?" she asked, her lips curling upwards as she smiled graciously up at him.

Anders grinned. "The Blooming Rose," he blurted out, elated that he would meet her so soon after their first encounter.

"I see…you work there?" She chuckled.

"Me? No," Anders grinned. "Not yet, anyhow."

The girl burst out laughing and Anders smiled as he scooped up some of the ingredients lying on the ground, his heart hammering in his chest.

She had a smirk on her face when she handed the embrium over to him. "You're a healer, then?"

"I try to be," Anders replied with a lopsided grin on his face. "Thank you." He grasped her hand unintentionally as he took the embrium, silently thanking the Maker and various others for this fortuitous encounter.

_Say something witty, you idiot! _

"It looks like rain, doesn't it?"

_Very good! Now kill yourself, why don't you?_

"Can I have my hand back?" she giggled. Anders quickly realized he was still holding it and released it immediately murmuring an apology to her.

She turned back to the lady vendor with a smile on her face, paid her for the potions she had bought and turned to leave, walking down the stairs that led to another area in the market. Anders quickly paid for his ingredients and dashed down the steps to catch up her as soon as he could. After all, the least he could do was ask her what her name was. He saw that she wasn't around, so he went up the stairs directly in front of him and stopped to get a better look.

He scanned the whole market area, but after some time he realized that she was gone. Sighing, he turned to head to the staircase that led down to Darktown and continued on.

_Andraste's knickerweasels! Why does she keep doing that? I'm going to have to tie her down next time!_

A mental image of the mysterious dark beauty he kept running into tied to a bed and completely naked came to his mind and he groaned – for he was now sporting a terrific erection.

_Talk about adding insult to injury._

…

Anders was busy enough in the days that followed. He had a lot of people to heal at his clinic and he also had to make more salves and potions to give to his patients. Five days after his romp with Isabela, he was busy healing a young boy who was near death when the door to his clinic swung open.

"Clinic is closed," he called, then smiled at the young boy who had finally opened his eyes. The boy's parents thanked him and he leaned against one of the wooden beams of the vast room to catch his breath and sighed, completely exhausted. A nice hot bath was the only thing that he had on his mind at the moment.

"Hey, Blondie!" Varric called out and recognizing Varric's voice he turned with a grin on his face, even though he was exhausted.

"Hey Va – oh!" Anders froze. Standing right next to Varric was the elusive dark beauty herself.

"Hello! Varric and Isabela tell me you're a Grey Warden," she grinned, fixing her eyes on him.

"Among other things, yes." Anders smiled back, giving her a wink.

She laughed, her violet eyes twinkling merrily, but seemed otherwise unimpressed. "Isabela also happened to mention that you have a map of a number of entrances to the Deep Roads?"

"I do," Anders replied quickly. "You're interested in the map, I presume?"

_If she's just asked you for the map it already means she's interested, you moron! _

"I'm organizing an expedition to the Deep Roads," she smiled sweetly, her eyes darting around and taking in the shabby surroundings. "I'll pay for the map in question."

"Ah! Well, what if I didn't want to sell it?" He teased.

"Everyone has a price," the girl shot back quickly. "Name yours."

He could tell she was a bit annoyed and wondered what he had said or done to cause this.

"Are you sure you want me to do that?" He gave her a lopsided smile. "I can be very expensive when I want to be."

"Isabela, you said he was smart," she turned to the pirate, who burst out laughing. It was now Anders's turn to be annoyed. _I __**am**__ smart…miss…miss SMARTY PANTS! _

"Fine, you want to go there, be my guest!" He exclaimed. "And here I thought we could be friends…"

"I never joke with strangers," she laughed, then shook her head. "I want no trouble with a Grey Warden…"

"And a healer!" He was quick to add.

She burst out laughing again, a hand on her face covering her mouth. "You're right! I want _no_ trouble at all from a healer! They can _HEAL_ you to death!"

He glanced at Varric, who seemed to have taken upon himself to count the wooden beams crisscrossing the ceiling. Sighing, Anders turned back to her.

"Let's start over, shall we?"

She shook her head to this. "I don't have time for all the formalities. But if you _must_ know, my name is Hawke and I would like to buy the map you have of the Deep Roads."

Isabela chuckled behind her.

"Fine! My name is Anders, and I'll give you the bloody map for free!" He turned around and headed to his small room at the back of the clinic. He could hear Varric saying something to her, while he dug out the map from his backpack and walked back to the main area of the clinic, stopping right in front of her and holding out the map so she could take it.

"How much?" she asked in a sing-song voice.

"Just take the bloody thing already, will you?" Anders frowned.

"You aren't going to sell it to me? You'd give it to me just like that? Why?" The puzzled look on her face only annoyed him more, but he couldn't say why. He only knew he was experiencing a roller coaster of emotions he didn't even know existed.

Hawke was now looking at him with a thoughtful expression on her face. She was clearly used to people asking either for money or favors in exchange for whatever she wanted.

"Why not?" Anders asked, shrugging.

"I can clearly see you need money, so I'll just give you a percentage of whatever we find in the Deep Roads."

"That sounds fair to me," Anders retorted.

"If you are a healer, I may need your help with a job," she continued, eyeing him with an amused expression on her face. "All you have to do is help with the fighting and heal our wounds. In return, I'll give you some of the coin that we'll get after completing the job."

"Why is it that you are under the impression that I do everything for money?" Anders shook his head, unable to comprehend what he was feeling at the moment.

_What in the Fade is wrong with me? _

"Hey, Blondie, that isn't what –"Varric began, but Anders turned to look at him – the look on his face clearly asking Varric to butt out so Varric shut up immediately and chuckled.

Hawke sighed. "You didn't tell me he was cranky, Isabela!"

"He wasn't! I swear!" Isabela protested.

"I'm _not_ cranky!" Anders hurried to say.

"Maybe he just needs to get laid," Hawke mused, a finger on her chin as she murmured the words.

"What?!" Anders exclaimed. "I can get laid whenever I want to! Also, I'm standing right here! Please don't speak of me as if I wasn't in the room!"

"Well, I haven't seen you at the Rose lately, so I just…assumed," Hawke smirked.

Anders rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Can I ask what we'll be doing tonight?"

"I'm certainly _not_ having sex with _you_, that's for sure," Hawke smiled sweetly and then winked at him.

"I meant the job!" Anders said through clenched teeth, clearly exasperated while Varric and Isabela snickered behind Hawke.

"Oh! I just have to find a runaway mage in The Wounded Coast, who needs help…running away some more," she grinned. "You'll come with us, then?"

Anders nodded to her question vehemently. He once again seemed to have lost the power of speech.

"Splendid! Let's get going, shall we? I don't want to miss all the bandits we'll run into along the way!" Hawke cried out, clapping her hands eagerly and turning to head to the door of the clinic. "I love killing things!"

"She's a real gem, isn't she?" Varric commented with a grin on his face as he turned to follow Hawke out of the clinic.

…

Excerpt from a page in Anders's journal written the following day:

_Exhausted! Don't even know what day it is today!_

_Maker's breath!_

_Note: Buy a new pair of boots! Preferably black. _

…


	4. Chapter 4

_**A huge thanks to karebear, koguma, BlessedArrow, Graymalkyn and Morninglight for your awesome reviews! Thanks also to my friends CouslandSpitFire and Eynla for all their suggestions and help! And to all of you who have put this story on their list of favorites and are following it: cookies and cake for everyone now! I LOVE reading your feedback btw! You are all absolutely awesome! :D **_

_**Someone get the drool buckets, time for a certain elf with a deep, deep smexy voice to make an appearance! HAHA! :D **_

_**Anders: "Hey! My voice is **_smexy, _**too!" **_

_**Bioware owns everything! I just play with the characters! :D **_

Chapter 4

It was late in the afternoon and Anders was busy healing some of the patrons who 'visited' The Blooming Rose two days later when Hawke materialized at the door to his clinic. He actually cringed for a few moments and at the same time felt the attraction he had for her take possession of him in ways he didn't want it to…_please don't let them look below my belt_… and he frowned slightly. He said good bye with a smile to the three people he had just healed, and then turned to face her, a wary expression on his face.

"Hello Hawke," he greeted her, nodding once. "I'm almost afraid to ask, but is there anything you need?"

She giggled. "We have another important job tonight, so I was wondering if you could come with us."

"Not outside Kirkwall, is it? It's a miracle the cliffs of The Wounded Coast haven't been reduced to mere beaches due to our running around back and forth over and over again two nights ago," he commented, turning to adjust the various bottles of potions and salves on a table next to the door that led to his room.

"I just wanted to make sure there were no bandits left," she grinned.

"Right," he nodded, noticing that the tone of sarcasm in his voice had not escaped her. "You owe me a pair of boots, by the way."

Hawke burst out laughing.

"It's about time!" she nodded cheerfully. "The ones you were wearing were in a dreadful state!"

He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, leaning against one of the wooden beams. "Anything else you need?"

"Just want to know more about you," she replied with a laugh as she inspected the various potions and salves. "I know you're Fereldan and a Grey Warden, but not much else. I'm terribly curious and probably an insufferable busybody."

"You know I'm an apostate and a former Grey Warden. What more do you need to know? Please step away from the potions. I don't want to make more because you've broken the bottles…"

She whirled around to face him, snickering. "I'm usually _very_ careful with bottles."

"I don't know about that. You're like the center of a hurricane to me," he smirked.

"You sound like a friend of mine. I should introduce you – she's training at the Guard Barracks in the Keep and unfortunately very busy at the moment," Hawke said, standing directly in front of Anders.

"A guard? I'd be delighted! Or maybe you could tie me up right now and hand me over to the templars. That would make her job so much easier," he quipped.

"I don't hand mages over to the templars," she frowned, her eyes darkening slightly for a few moments. "And neither do my friends. Besides, nobody deserves that."

He was taken aback by her frown and the serious tone in her voice, and suddenly realized that she really disliked the templars – maybe even as much as he did. He also discovered – much to his surprise – that he _really_ needed to know why.

"You aren't a mage…" he said, trying to keep a nonchalant attitude and failing completely. "…and should care nothing about mages and templars. We even helped a runaway mage two nights ago. Why would you do that?"

She shrugged aloofly, turning away from him and walked to the door of his humble room, taking a peek inside.

"This is your room, isn't it?" she said conversationally, then turned back, heading towards the door and avoiding his gaze entirely. "The job is in Kirkwall, yes. You can meet Varric and Isabela at The Hanged Man in a couple of hours if you're interested. I live right next to it, so I'll meet you all there."

"You haven't answered my question," Anders called out to her, his curiosity growing by the minute.

"I know!" she chuckled.

Then she was gone.

…

When he reached The Hanged Man nearly two hours later, he walked in and made his way to Varric's suite, pausing only to wink at Norah, whom he had enjoyed a night of passion with three nights after his sexual adventure with Isabela. The attractive waitress gave him a sultry smile and he chuckled all the way up the stairs.

"Hey, Varric!" Anders grinned at the dwarf, who waved at him from the table in his room. Isabela smiled at him as he sat down and stretched his long legs in front of him.

"So you're coming with us?" Varric grinned. "Good! I needed the laughs."

"Hey! I'm not just some personal jester to drag along, you know," Anders smirked. "Do you know what we'll be doing, by any chance?"

"A little. One of the dwarves from the merchant's guild has asked for our help. His name is Anso. That's all I know, unfortunately," Varric replied. "Hawke will be here soon enough, though."

"Why are you working with her?" Anders asked. "Didn't you tell me that she was working for someone named Athenril?"

"Her year is up, apparently, so she visited my brother and wanted in on the Deep Roads expedition he was trying to organize. Something about an unknown thaig in the deeps," Varric said. "Anyway, my brother said 'no' to her, but I knew who she was and that she would be an invaluable addition to the expedition. I also convinced her that she should become our partner and pitch in with fifty gold, which meant that technically, she would be running the whole show."

Varric laughed, shaking his head with an amused expression. "I helped her with a little problem she had in Hightown before we met, actually. A pickpocket tried to steal her coin purse, but I intervened and got it back for her. We started talking and here we are."

Anders had shuddered at the mention of 'the deeps'. "Anyone who willingly wants to go down into the Deep Roads is slightly mad in my opinion. But hey, I'm not here to judge," he shrugged. "You said her year was up? What do you mean?"

"Both Hawke and her sister had been working for a year for Athenril in order to pay off a debt they had with her. When Hawke first arrived here, it was during the Blight and you actually had to bribe the guards in order to enter the city. There were simply too many Fereldan refugees. Her uncle arranged a meeting with Athenril and Athenril paid the bribe. In return, Hawke and her sister agreed to work for Athenril for a year to pay off the debt," Varric explained. "She's free now and can work at anything she wants. But she needs coin to provide for her sister and mother, even though they're living at her uncle's house right now. Most Fereldan refugees don't even have a place to live. But I'm sure you know this already because you're in Darktown and see it on a day to day basis."

Anders nodded to this and at that moment Hawke walked into the room, greeting everyone with a hearty hello. A pretty dark-haired young woman stood behind her and smiled shyly, her brown eyes darting nervously around the room.

"This is my sister, Bethany," Hawke introduced her, her violet eyes lingering on Anders, who started, feeling the magic emanating from the shy girl and noticing that she was carrying a staff on her back. "She'll be coming with us."

And then the conversation he had had with her back at his clinic made perfect sense to him and he gave Hawke a lopsided smile and a nod, his brown eyes holding her violet ones warmly.

Her sister was a mage.

…

Anders started to suspect they were walking into a trap when they met the dwarf in a hidden corner in Lowtown. His story seemed a bit shady to him and it seemed a little too easy. When they all headed towards the hovel where they would get Anso's supply of lyrium in the Elven Alienage, he felt alarm bells go off. Apparently Varric felt the same way and voiced his concern.

"I hope it's a trap!" Hawke exclaimed cheerfully. "It will make everything so much more exciting!"

He thought about running back to his clinic, so of course he stayed right where he was.

_I'm such a coward…_

Hawke's sister giggled nervously and then was silent when Hawke opened the door to the place. They all walked inside warily.

When Hawke found the set of traps laid out on the ground in front of one of the doors that led to a room inside the hovel, Anders was positive that it was a trap. Even though they were attacked immediately afterwards, he was actually expecting more violence and was surprised to see they only fought about a dozen people, give or take. Child's play to the fierce and beautiful rogue leading them whom he suspected was absolutely barking insane.

When she opened the chest that was inside one of the rooms and announced there was nothing inside, Anders felt uneasy. This was was indeed a trap, no question about it. He peered into the shadows expecting more people to jump out and attack them, but nobody did.

Varric was exceedingly upset and wanted to go 'talk' to Anso for sending them on a wild goose chase. Hawke giggled as she flung the door open and walked outside.

A group of at least two dozen, well-armed soldiers stood all around, and had apparently been waiting for them to come out. Their armor looked Tevinter and they carried top-of-the-line weapons.

_Shit! I hate it when I'm right!_

Anders quickly encased three of the soldiers that were heading towards Hawke in ice with a flick of his hand, and reached into the Fade to conjure up an electricity maelstrom that would electrocute the rest, while Isabela and Hawke jumped from soldier to solider, delivering killing blows and laughing about it, counting the number of people they were killing. Varric shot a myriad of arrows from his beloved crossbow, Bianca, which slowed the attackers down considerably and also yelled out how many soldiers he had killed. Apparently it was contagious - or maybe a code among rogues - to count the enemies they had felled in battle.

Meanwhile, Bethany flung a couple of well-aimed fireballs at another group that was coming in. Since she continued to attack using fire, Anders immediately understood that she had mainly specialized in elemental magic and was especially fond of fire spells. He personally preferred using ice and electricity spells, so they soon complemented each other rather well as they dispatched all the enemies they could.

After the first initial wave of the two dozen they fought and killed, more showed up. A mage dropped down from a ledge above, and made a movement to probably cast a protective barrier around himself, but Bethany had already guessed he would do this and cast a spell on him that Anders quickly identified as a horror spell because the poor man started to scream in terror, placing his hands over his face as he squirmed around.

"Nice work!" Anders grinned looking at her appreciatively and she blushed, lowering her shining brown eyes, but smiled as she glanced up at him moments later.

Anders grinned inwardly at her gentle manner and awkwardness and ventured to guess that she was probably a virgin. Hawke suddenly materialized right between them.

"Focus on the fight," she hissed, her eyes flashing angrily for a few seconds. Anders was initially taken aback for he had never seen her get angry about anything before, but it actually made some sense because he had already noticed that she was extremely protective of her sister.

The Tevinter soldiers stopped appearing after a while and Hawke decided to go through each of the bodies to search for coin or anything of value. That was a lot of bodies to go through. Anders sighed as he followed her around, audibly in fact, just to get her attention. He also wanted to vex her, just to see how she would react.

"Stop that!" she finally yelled, turning around to face him, her violet eyes flashing angrily for the second time that night. Anders gave her a lopsided smile and discovered that he was slightly turned on by her anger.

"Stop what?" he teased, wondering if she would slash him with her daggers if he kissed her.

"You _know _what!" she replied and turned back to the dead body in front of her. Anders glanced at Varric who shook his head with a smile and rolled his eyes, but behind him Isabela snickered. Bethany looked concerned, her soulful brown eyes on her sister.

They neared the staircase that would take them out of the Alienage, and a lone Tevinter soldier appeared on the landing, gazing at them angrily. Anders groaned.

_Here we go again!_

"I don't know who you are friend, but you've made a terrible mistake coming here tonight! "the man growled impressively. Anders glanced at Hawke who had burst out laughing at this. The man turned his head slightly and yelled at someone else who was hidden from view. "Lieutenant... I want everyone in this clearing! NOW!"

A fresh peal of laughter erupted from Hawke.

_Shit!_ He reached for his staff, but needn't have bothered, for the lieutenant in question suddenly appeared from behind with a cavity in his chest the size of a man's fist and mumbled 'Captain', before sinking to the floor – as dead as a doornail.

A white-haired elf made his entrance, sweeping down the stairs majestically as he spoke and stood directly in front of Hawke, his bright green eyes shining in the moonlight. Anders also noticed his right steel gauntlet was dripping with blood. Not a very encouraging sight to see at all.

"Your men are dead and your trap has failed. I suggest you escape while you still can," the elf deadpanned calmly, his voice sending chills up and down Anders's spine.

Anders's right eyebrow shot up when he noticed the weird white tattoo markings all over the elf's face, arms and neck. His skin started to tingle slightly, and he wondered for a brief few seconds if the markings were magical. He stole a quick glance at Hawke, who suddenly started smiling at this white-haired elf seductively, her eyes shining like twin stars and he immediately frowned at this, a plethora of emotions doing a merry dance number inside him.

_Crap! Just what I needed! Competition! _

…

Excerpt from Anders's journal later that night:

_Stupid Tevinter mages who dabble in stupid blood magic and who sacrifice virgins and kittens (I HOPE THEY ALL SHRIVEL UP AND DIE!) to the old gods….AND who let their stupid slaves run away! STUPID! _

_Stupid runaway slaves who can kill a person by plunging their hands into their chests and squeezing their hearts! …And who hate all mages! _

…_I _**did**_ like his green eyes and lyrium lines, though! _

_And…If I ever run out of mana, all I have to do is stand right beside him! But I'll have to get him to glow first which wouldn't be hard since he already wants to kill me._

…


	5. Chapter 5

_**Thanks so much to the lovely people who have written their awesome reviews: Erynnar, BlessedArrow, Melysande, karebear, Morninglight and Eynla and to all those who continue to add the fic to their list of favorites and alerts! You all rock! :D A special thanks to Eynla, for her suggestions and help with this chapter! :D **_

_**Anders fitting in with the rest of Hawke companions will be done in a special kind of order. They will go on some of the quests from the game here and there, but they will follow their own unique dialogue and will have unique ways of taking care of things. Anders's Journal will be used as an extra insight or peek/window into his thoughts, heart and soul. **_

_**This chapter has some sexual innuendos here and there, so if you are at work, be careful when you read it! **_

_**Bioware owns everything, I swear! **_

Chapter 5

The following day, Anders spent the morning organizing his clinic and thinking about Hawke, cursing every now and then because he couldn't get her out of his head. His patients were all cured and he had some free time on his hands, which he spent twiddling his thumbs and eating. When he started seeing the patterns on the ceiling come to life and crawl, he stood up quickly and tried to find something to do. Things got worse when the idea of paying Hawke a visit crossed his mind.

"_Oh, hello, Hawke! I just thought I'd come over and try to convince you to have hot, unbridled sex with me!"_

"_Hot, unbridled sex? Why of course, Anders! Let me just get my daggers sharpened first!"_

He was on the verge of losing his mind, alright!

He walked into his tiny room, squeezing between the cot and the wall to check the coin he had in his coin purse in the corner and realized he had more than enough for some fun at The Blooming Rose later. He smiled crookedly to himself as he approached his potion table and got to work on a few more embrium potions just in case while he waited for it to get dark, even though he knew the evening was a long way off.

He started thinking about Hawke again and cursed under his breath. The fact that she was a woman who didn't seem to be attracted to him probably bothered him the most. Maybe this was one of the reasons why he couldn't stop thinking about her. A vision of Hawke kissing Fenris, the white-haired elf from the previous night, suddenly popped into his head just like that and it nearly drove him up the walls of his clinic. He forced himself to focus on what he was doing, pounding on the embrium in his mortar a little more vigorously than necessary.

He was so focused on his task that he didn't hear Hawke enter his clinic.

"Hello Anders!" her voice said close to his right ear. He dropped both the mortar and pestle he was holding – the contents scattering all over the table as he cursed. Loudly.

"Shit on Andraste's knickerweasels, woman!" he exclaimed as he hurried to put the ingredients back into the mortar. "You nearly scared me to death!"

"I can't help it if I'm a good rogue, Anders," Hawke chuckled.

Anders turned and saw that she had brought Fenris with her. Varric was there as well, a huge grin of anticipation on his face. Anders knew exactly what Varric was thinking and rolled his eyes. Standing right behind Varric was Bethany - who was also smiling, and beside her was a ginger-haired woman Anders had never seen before. She was wearing a guard uniform, and he vaguely remembered Hawke telling him about a friend who was a City Guard.

"This is Aveline, Anders. She came with us from Lothering when we escaped the Blight," Hawke said, gesturing towards the redhead.

"You were in Lothering during the Blight?" Anders asked.

"She killed an ogre," Varric commented. "That's _not_ something you see every day."

"I had help," Hawke laughed. "Right, Aveline?"

The redhead smiled, but offered no further comment.

"Are we going somewhere, or is this a social visit?" Fenris asked sullenly.

"I see you've brought 'Liri' with you," Anders grinned.

"What did you call me?" Fenris asked, bristling visibly.

"It's short for 'Lyrium'," Anders smirked. "I haven't had time to think of a good nickname yet."

"Hey, now!" Varric protested with a chuckle. "_I'm_ the one who comes up with the nicknames around here!"

Fenris was clenching and unclenching his fists repeatedly and Anders had to bite his lower lip to stop himself from laughing. Aveline was keeping an eye on Fenris's tattoos and frowning, while Bethany was trying hard not to giggle. Hawke simply stepped really close to Fenris and whispered something in his ear, and he immediately relaxed, offering her a small smile.

"That's really good!" Anders exclaimed cheekily. "Can he sit up and roll over too?"

Fenris's lyrium tattoos started to glow and he took a step forward, the scowl on his face alarming Aveline who took a step towards him, her hand on her sword.

"Oh, boy," Varric said in an amused tone under his breath, but loud enough so that everyone could hear.

"Anders, stop it!" Hawke said, moving in front of Fenris so that she was in the middle. She turned to Fenris. "He's only baiting you because he _knows_ you're going to get angry at him!" She turned back to Anders and shook her head, her violet eyes flashing angrily for a split second.

She was so close to him that he felt tempted to close the distance between them and kiss her on the lips. He smiled, winking at her with a smug expression on his face and she chuckled suddenly, shaking her head.

"I'll behave for a kiss," Anders said playfully, wiggling his eyebrows.

She burst out laughing. "Playing this game now, are we? I can think of something much better! Pull down your trousers and smalls right now and I'll give you a kiss – right where you want it!"

He took a step back, utterly confused. He had not expected that.

"Come on! What are you waiting for?" Hawke taunted, licking her lips and batting her long eyelashes at him. "I'm dying to get on my knees! I'm not bluffing, I assure you!"

Varric burst out laughing and even Fenris smiled. Aveline and Bethany, on the other hand, were totally shocked into silence and stared at Hawke as if she had sprouted another head or something.

Anders tried to get the image of Hawke on her knees before him out of his head, but it was impossible. He merely swallowed thickly and nodded, sweat forming on his forehead and upper lip as he struggled to get a grip on himself. "I'll try to – stop baiting him," Anders murmured, painfully aware of the fact that he now had a throbbing erection.

"Good," she smirked, stepping back and turning to Fenris. "What about you?"

"He's the one that started it; I've done nothing at all, so why should I promise to do anything?" Fenris scowled, giving Anders an angry glance.

"Because I've already asked you nicely?" Hawke simply said with a sweet smile on her face.

And, of course, Fenris nodded and calmed down immediately.

…

They travelled to Sundermount to deliver something to someone there. Anders sighed as he looked down at his boots. He had just bought them and had used a spell so that they wouldn't pinch the sides of his feet. Now they were walking through the brush and near ponds, over small hills and across marshy lands as they neared some mountains. He really wanted the boots he was wearing to last, but feared their lifespan would soon come to an end.

Glancing ahead, he was distracted by Hawke's swaying hips. He smiled to himself, utterly fascinated by them and didn't really pay attention to where they were going. It came as a shock, therefore, when they stopped and Hawke addressed a couple of Dalish elves. And just like that, they found themselves inside a Dalish camp.

"This is a Dalish camp!" Anders exclaimed as he fell into step beside Hawke who was walking around the camp clearly looking for someone.

"Now what would give you that idea?" Hawke chuckled.

"What are we doing here?" Anders shot back, sounding a bit annoyed.

Hawke stopped walking and looked up at him, a mischievous glint in her eye. "Haven't you been paying attention at all?"

"I _know_ you have to deliver something to someone - I just never expected to be in a Dalish camp ever again!" Anders exclaimed.

"Again?" Hawke asked. "You've been in one before?"

"Well, not where there were any Dalish elves, but that's not the point!" Anders's reply tumbled out in a rush.

"A Dalish camp without Dalish elves?" Hawke burst out laughing. "You're absolutely priceless, Anders!"

Anders grinned back at her. "That's not what I meant, though I'll admit it _was_ kind of funny…"

"The Keeper is right over there," Fenris's deep voice interrupted, gesturing towards an elderly lady who seemed to be delicately swaying with the gentle breeze blowing around the camp at intervals.

Anders opened his mouth to say something, but Hawke elbowed him rather hard in the stomach, eliciting a groan from him instead.

"Ah! Thanks, Fenris," she smiled sweetly as she moved away from Anders, who was now massaging his stomach and glaring at the white-haired elf.

Fenris smirked at Anders and then turned to follow Hawke.

Aveline and Bethany passed Anders as they followed as well, but Varric stopped and stood next to him waiting for him to recover.

"She's got a good punch, eh Blondie?" Varric said pleasantly.

"I wish you'd stop calling me that," Anders sighed.

…

The Keeper informed them they had to go up the mountain, meeting her First, Merrill, along the way, who was tasked to perform a rite of some kind at an altar. Then she asked Hawke to take Merrill to Kirkwall with her once the rite was over and done with.

Anders quickly stepped close to Hawke as they neared the base of the mountain.

"I don't think we should take this Merrill anywhere and certainly not to Kirkwall," he stated.

"I can't wiggle myself out of this. I promised the witch that helped us escape the Blight that I would do whatever the Keeper asked me to do in exchange," Hawke replied, looking up the mountain. A short distance away she could make out a petite form sitting on a green natural ledge.

"I'm telling you, all Dalish women are insane," Anders remarked. "Don't say I didn't warn you."

"Did you meet an insane one in that Dalish camp you mentioned before? You know…the one that didn't have any Dalish elves in it?" Hawke grinned.

"No, not exactly. We met her in the wilderness. Her camp had been abandoned by her people," Anders said. "But that's not the point. The point is –"

"That all Dalish women are insane," Hawke interrupted, finishing off the sentence for him. "Yes, I heard you the first time, Anders. I'll keep that in mind, thank you."

When they finally reached the person that was sitting on the grassy ledge, she jumped up and began to talk non-stop, greeting all of them with a slightly lost and fearful expression in her eyes.

Merrill was cute. She was naïve and awkward, and constantly feared she was upsetting someone. But she was cute. Anders took an instant liking to her because she made no sense at all and this amused him. She certainly was a refreshing change from Velanna, who had nearly always been angry and ready to attack and maim others.

They were ambushed and attacked by the undead and shades on the way to the altar as they climbed the mountain. As they fought, Merrill revealed herself to the group as a mage who used a lot of nature spells which complemented Bethany's use of fire and Anders's use of ice and electricity.

They met one of the Dalish elves further up the mountain and he asked Hawke to finish her task as quick as she could so she could take Merrill away from their camp. Anders inched forward until he was standing close to Hawke and whispered, "Insane," in her ear.

Hawke smiled at Anders and shook her head, while Merrill stumbled over her words trying to apologize for the way her clan was behaving. But it wasn't until they went into a tunnel on the side of the mountain that things _really_ took a turn.

…

First it was the stupid giant spiders they literally ran into inside the tunnel that opened into a vast cavern with different chambers and sloped upwards towards the mountaintop again. Anders didn't like spiders, with their many legs and deadly poison. He did know that ice slowed them down, however, just like it slowed down other creatures and demons from across the Veil. Electricity did them in nicely as well.

He nearly used up all his mana because they were ambushed several times, and also because they were attacked by corrupted giant spiders twice. The corrupted ones were extremely deadly because aside from the regular poison that killed, they were tainted creatures. This meant that they could potentially spread the taint to their prey, and it also meant they were stronger and harder to kill. Anders had a difficult time because he had to continuously heal both Aveline and Fenris who liked to charge into a fight without thinking of the consequences.

On a more productive note, Fenris was glowing the entire time they were attacked and all the other times as well, which Anders took to his advantage. Every time he felt his mana drain away all he had to do was run behind Fenris and his mana would replenish completely. He kept this up for a while until Fenris got suspicious and asked him why he was following him around. Well, he didn't exactly 'ask'…nor was he particularly nice about it. He might have even snarled at Anders once.

"I'm just making sure you stay alive," Anders replied wiggling his eyebrows, smiling warmly at the elf.

"If you keep on doing this, _you _might meet your untimely end," Fenris deadpanned.

Anders's eyebrows shot upwards and he took a step back, keeping his distance. "Didn't I tell you two to stop it?" Hawke intervened, throwing up her hands in utter exasperation. "I need you two to focus on the fighting, not bicker at each other!" She looked right up at Anders who winked at her.

Hawke rolled her eyes and shook her head as she moved up the slope towards the exit with the rest closely following her.

As they emerged on the other side, they noticed what looked like two stone columns and a graveyard up ahead. There was something that looked like a barrier that kept them from advancing any further. Merrill frowned, which could only mean that she hadn't anticipated this.

Hawke turned to the Dalish elf. "I don't see a way around it. Any suggestions?"

"I can open the way forward," Merrill said as she advanced right up to the magical barrier.

Then she took a knife and cut her palm, throwing the blood on the barrier. A hissing voice was heard and something that sounded like wings and a scream and then the barrier vanished.

Anders's jaw dropped open and he just stared at the whole thing for a full five seconds before he ventured to even close his mouth, let alone talk.

Fenris, however, did _not_ want to talk. He immediately unsheathed his huge greatsword and adopted an offensive stance, a scowl on his face as he regarded Merrill with hatred.

"Blood mage!" he practically spat at her, his tattoos glowing brightly. "Prepare to die!"

"This is just the sort of thing I needed for my story!" Varric exclaimed beside Anders, a wide grin on his face.

…

Excerpt from Anders's journal:

_Today was an ordinary day…and I'm laughing at the words I just wrote. _

_Important things to note:_

_- Get more embrium._

_- If possible, purchase a mirror or two and put them on the table so I can see if someone is creeping up behind me._

_- Merrill is cute._

_- Merrill is still alive._

_- Fenris isn't exactly Hawke's favorite right now! HA! _

_- Merrill uses blood magic. A bit upsetting as it involves demons and other terrifying entities that can kill or possess you, but I told Hawke that Dalish women were insane. No one ever listens._

_- Avoid going back to Sundermount as much as possible – it's a death trap! _

_- Run like crazy in the OPPOSITE direction if Flemeth appears again._

_Note to self: Try to learn the 'Hawke' language to avoid getting killed in the future._

_Hawke language: witch = dragon lady abomination/Flemeth._

_Also, will be needing yet another new pair of boots soon, so I might as well ask Hawke to supply me with boots every time we leave Kirkwall._

_VERY IMPORTANT: The tension is killing me here. Must get laid as soon as possible! _

…


	6. Chapter 6

_**Thank you BlessedArrow and Morninglight for your awesome reviews! Cookies and cake for you! :D I also want to thank all those who have added this fic to their list of favorites and are now following it! :D**_

_**I want to especially thank my dear friend CouslandSpitFire, who in spite of being busy, graciously took some of her time to help me out with this chapter! You are AWESOME and I really appreciate all your help! :D **_

_**A slightly more serious chapter – as Anders tries to get closer to Hawke, and Hawke doesn't let him...much. This chapter will show us their feelings a bit more and somewhat reveal what they are made of. Yep, a little bit of drama doesn't hurt anyone, right? (Famous last words.)**_

_**At any rate, I hope you all enjoy this - your feedback would be REALLY welcome! **_

_**My disclaimer as usual: Bioware owns everything! :D **_

Chapter 6

In the weeks that followed, Anders felt like he was on a runaway horse. He had never been on a horse, but he felt that a runaway horse would qualify as 'fast'. Hawke was taking him on every single available job and she was all over the place once she got to her destination.

So…he felt like he was on a runaway horse.

He tried to get her attention, but she merely laughed at all his attempts. She _did_ flirt with him, and laugh at all his jokes, but she made no other advances. Plus, she flirted with every man in the group, and every woman, too. In fact, she was as much of a flirt as he was. He knew she was not a virgin and she had fun at the Blooming Rose on occasion, but she never encouraged him, which made him try all the harder.

By the time two weeks of all this had gone by, Anders was beginning to wonder if there was something wrong with his charming skills of seduction.

He asked Isabela about this one day when she visited him at the clinic after she had gotten into a fight with some thugs and needed some healing.

"Isabela, when I flirt with you…do you get…sexually aroused?"

Isabela stared at him for a few moments and burst out laughing. He felt his ego reach an all-time low. "Am I _really_ that bad?'

"Not really, no. But I know you and have bedded you already. Why would I be sexually aroused whenever you smile at me or wiggle your fingers?" Isabela asked.

"You have a fair point," Anders agreed, with a lopsided grin. Then he was serious again. "But if we hadn't had sex, would you be sexually aroused?"

"This is about Hawke, isn't it?" Isabela grinned. "Actually Varric and I have a bet going on about that…"

"A…bet?"

Isabela nodded. "Varric says she'll cave in and kiss you passionately one day in front of everyone."

"Thanks for your vote of confidence," Anders frowned. "I didn't know I was that bad."

"Aww, sweet thing! It's not that you're bad at all! It's just that I have a feeling _you'll_ be the one that breaks down first."

"Fuck," Anders replied sadly.

"Besides, Hawke is probably wondering why you don't hurry up and kiss her," Isabela said with a smirk. "She probably wants you to break down completely and jump her passionately."

"Liar! You're only saying this so that you can win your bet!" Anders exclaimed.

Isabela shrugged. "Whatever helps you sleep at night, Sparkles." She got up and smiled seductively at Anders. "Sorry, but I have to run. Jethann is waiting for me at the Blooming Rose."

Anders waved her out, a thoughtful expression on his face as he considered all his options. Then he realized he really didn't have any.

"Fuck," he said again sadly and banged his head against the wooden beam he had been leaning against. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck…"

…

They were in The Wounded Coast, because Hawke had run into a dwarf called Javaris Tintop and he had asked Hawke to find the Tal-Vashoth there and wipe them out. Hawke and her group would then travel back to the Qunari compound in the docks and meet with Javaris and the Arishok once the job was done.

Anders had totally changed his behavior with her. Instead of mindlessly flirting continuously, he started to ask her questions about herself. Hawke's reaction to that was to turn around and look at him, her jaw slightly open and surprise written all over her face.

"What?" she asked eloquently.

"I'm just wondering about you," Anders replied truthfully. "I want to know why you're taking all these jobs non-stop. I also want to know why you came here from Ferelden exactly and why you seem to be helping the mages in most of your jobs. I'm just…curious."

A blush crept over Hawke's cheeks. Given that she was outrageous and irreverent about nearly everything, her blush took Anders by surprise. It also made him feel all tingly inside. He blinked back at her waiting for her to answer at least one of his questions.

She resumed walking as she spoke, avoiding his gaze and trying to unsuccessfully hide the fact that she was still blushing.

"You know I'm a refugee from Lothering and I came here escaping the Blight with my mother and sister. What else is there to tell?"

"Oh, I don't know…things like: What's your favorite color? Do you like fish? What's your favorite food? Do you like the scenery?"

"You want me to answer all those questions?" Hawke replied with a grin. "Are you serious?"

"I don't know, should I be serious?" Anders asked, standing beside her, his eyes fixed on her face and delicate features. He was actually enjoying himself, but her smile had started to get a little 'wooden'.

"Why would I want you to get serious?" Hawke asked. Anders could see she was struggling to keep her voice light. He turned his head and saw Isabela elbowing Varric. Turning back, he grinned stupidly at Hawke, who was now looking around the Wounded Coast. If Anders ventured a guess, she was probably wishing for some bandits to appear. _Anything to get herself out of this conversation, right?_

"Now _that_ is something only _you_ can answer," Anders's grin deepened.

She passed a hand over her forehead nervously, then turned to continue walking, but Anders's hand shot out and grabbed her arm.

"I want to know more about you. I hardly know anything. Andraste's knickerweasels! I don't even know your name!"

"My name is Rhianna," Hawke replied quickly, struggling to disentangle her arm from his grasp. "There. Are you satisfied? I'm here on a _job_, you know! _A job_! You get coin after doing it? You're familiar with the concept, I hope?"

"There's no reason why we shouldn't talk along the way, as long as nobody attacks us," Anders commented with a lopsided grin, letting her arm go. "Rhianna is a lovely name. It sounds…exotic. I like exotic things!"

"I don't like speaking about myself," Hawke frowned.

"How are we going to be best friends if we don't know more about each other?" Anders teased.

Her brow furrowed. "There's nothing to know."

"Oh, I think there is. For example, I want to know about your father. You've never mentioned him," Anders shot back.

"Uh, oh," Varric said behind them as Hawke stopped in her tracks and turned to face him again, the flush on her cheeks reaching an interesting shade of red.

Merrill, who was with them this time around, said nothing, but gazed out to the sea, lost in happy visions of fantastic tales of pirates and sea monsters. Isabela was fidgeting around, but looking at them closely, waiting for Hawke's reaction. Aveline hadn't come, because she was busy at the barracks, Bethany had stayed at home studying a spell tome that Hawke had given her, and since they had found Fenris lying drunk and unconscious on the floor of his mansion, he wasn't with them either.

"My father?" Hawke echoed - her eyes suddenly sad. She bit her lower lip and Anders's eyes flew down to them, the urge to kiss her reaching unbearable heights. His eyes then flickered back to hers and held her gaze.

"Yes, I want to know why you never talk about him," Anders insisted. He doubted she would answer, since she was taking so long to do so, but he had to give it a shot. "Bethany told me I reminded her of him."

"He's dead," Hawke finally replied after a long while of uncomfortable silence. "He was an apostate healer who died protecting my sister from a couple of templars who were trying to rape her."

Anders's eyes widened and he closed the distance between them to take her in his arms, but Hawke backed away, her eyes brimming with unshed tears. She shook her head and resumed her walk, not looking back.

"Nice work, Blondie," Varric muttered to a shocked Anders as he walked past him.

…

Hawke was visibly still shaken from her chat with Anders. She flung herself at every single Tal-Vashoth she saw, hacking and kicking and backstabbing almost blindly, with Anders right behind her with his heart in his throat most of the time. When they had finished dealing with the Tal-Vashoth leader in a cavern full of Tal-Vashoth, _and _miraculously escaped the jaws of death when a Saarebas almost cast a deadly electricity spell on all of them, she simply wiped her daggers clean on a patch of grass and calmly walked out – avoiding Anders's gaze.

By the time they reached the Arishok and Javaris at the Qunari compound in the docks, Hawke was clearly angry, and ready to bite anyone's head off. To make matters worse, Isabela had left in a hurry, saying that she had to be somewhere else.

Since nobody dared talk to her and Javaris was the only one who did, she fixed her angry gaze on the unfortunate dwarf who made the stupid mistake of complaining to her that she was late and that he had been waiting there for hours.

When the dwarf turned to her for help in convincing the Arishok to sell him the explosive powder, she merely sneered at the dwarf and her words caused him to blink back in confusion.

"I killed all the Tal-Vashoth as you asked me to. I merely want my payment, dwarf. I don't really care about your deal."

Javaris frowned. If she wasn't willing to back him up, this meant that he was doomed. He looked up at the Arishok, who was staring down at him sternly and attempted a smile. The dwarf then tried to convince the Arishok that he had planned everything carefully, but the Arishok wasn't fooled. To make matters worse, Hawke told the Arishok she had been promised coin and Javaris hadn't paid her.

The Arishok demanded the dwarf pay Hawke, and she bit her lower lip, but this time Anders guessed it was to avoid bursting out laughing as her eyes were twinkling up a storm. The dwarf paid her and left muttering angrily, but she didn't care. She had four more sovereigns and she smiled and winked at Anders as they left the compound.

"That was clever," Anders remarked as soon as they were safely out of the compound.

"He wanted to drag me into his lie," Hawke replied. "Even if the Arishok is a Qunari, nobody deserves to be lied to. Besides, it was the easiest way to ensure I would get paid." She chuckled, looking very pleased with herself.

"Do you have enough coin for the expedition now?" Varric asked hopefully.

"More than enough, yes. But I want to work on other jobs as well. Since I'll be away for weeks, I'd like to leave some coin with Mother, so that she has enough to get by until I return."

Anders felt himself melt at her words. He pursed his lips trying to get a grip on himself. Looking towards the right to hide his face from her, he caught Varric looking and him, a wide predatory grin on his face.

Anders felt the blood rush to his face as he picked up the pace leaving Varric behind.

_Shit! What the fuck is wrong with me? _

…

Another week passed without much to say or do. Hawke had stopped coming to get him before embarking on missions that would earn her more coin. When he realized she wasn't coming to get him, he slid into a depression of sorts, the yearning to see her again burning in his heart like a brand.

_Deep breaths. Get through the day. You'll make it!_

Even though he tried to convince himself everything was fine, he continued to mope around, the darkness inside the walls making it hard for him to breathe. He shook his head and left the clinic one morning, locking the doors securely before heading up to one of the lifts.

He usually avoided the Gallows, but this time he wanted to get more Embrium and Spindleweed, and the vendor in Lowtown had none. So he found himself taking one of the boats crossing the harbor to the Gallows, confident that the vendors there would have both herbs in stock.

He felt uneasy when the boat docked and he left it behind, his eyes darting around to check where the templars were.

On this particular day the place was full of mages and not a whole lot of templars to guard them. He frowned unable to comprehend why this was happening and continued to frown as he made his way to Solivitus's shop. Then he saw the brand on a mage's forehead and realized why there were hardly any templars around. The truth of the matter was that nearly all the mages walking around the Gallows courtyard were the ones that had been made Tranquil and therefore did not need templars around to control or guard them.

He continued to walk, careful enough to blend into the crowds in the Gallows. He didn't want to get caught, so he moved using the Tranquil and other mages as protective shields to hide him from templar scrutiny.

"Anders!" Solivitus smiled when he reached the stall shaking his hand heartily. "It's been a while!"

Anders's smile was earnest, even though he was feeling uneasy and looked around nervously while he talked.

"I need some plants and herbs for my potions. The vendor in Lowtown has run out of them."

"Certainly, my friend. What do you need?" Solivitus smiled pleasantly.

"Some Embrium and Spindleweed will do nicely. Though I'm not against going through your stock to see if I need anything else," Anders grinned.

Solivitus had picked up the ingredients Anders had asked for very quickly, wrapping them up in a package which he handed over to Anders. Anders paid for the herbs with a smile, then fixed his gaze on the chest that he knew was full of all sorts of interesting ingredients.

"Go right ahead and look through the chest. I'm sure you'll find something else you can use," Solivitus said.

Anders was still smiling as he knelt in front of the chest to look through all the herbs, plants and roots. He became absorbed in his task and nearly jumped out of his skin when a hand touched his back gently.

He stood up rather quickly, his staff now in his right hand and his left extended before him as he stood at the ready.

"Nice reflexes," Hawke grinned. "I didn't know you shopped here…"

Anders relaxed having put away his staff as soon as he saw it was Hawke. "Hunting for potion ingredients yourself, right?"

"Yes. I make my own potions. Father taught me," Hawke grinned, her eyes on the herbs and plants in the chest.

"That's new," Anders quipped, stepping closer to her. "I would have thought only mages made their own potions."

"Father thought we should all know a little about anything that could potentially save our lives," Hawke said with a smile. She scooped up some Spindleweed herself, smiling at Solivitus as she paid for it. She turned to walk to the next stall, and Anders fell into step beside her. He never knew what prompted him to say what he said to her next, but he spoke without thinking.

"So...do you make your own salves to cure sexually transmitted diseases as well?"

Hawke quickly turned to look at him, but found only warmth in his brown eyes. She then burst out laughing at his comment.

"I have a potion for that," she said, her eyes twinkling like twin stars. "_You_ should know very well what is best to use, right?"

"Well, I use a salve which I make myself. But yes, I do know and use that salve a lot," Anders grinned. He paused as his eyes roamed over her beautiful face, lingering on her full lips. "It was nice to meet you here. I haven't seen you in a while."

"I've been busy, working hard for when the expedition leaves," Hawke replied. "I want to give Mother as much coin as possible before I leave."

Anders nodded, his eyes now fixed on hers. "We always seem to bump into each other, don't we?"

Hawke nodded, her smile turning into a grin. "Must be fate," she murmured.

Anders chuckled. "I don't really believe that. I believe we make our own destiny."

"I used to think that, too, before…" her voice trailed off as she stared into the distance, evoking a memory from the past. She shook her head and smiled, looking up at him. "It doesn't matter."

"Is there a reason why you haven't been around to take me on your adventures?" Anders asked, the words tumbling out of his mouth.

Hawke frowned and opened her mouth to say something, but whatever it was, he never knew because at that very moment he bumped into someone and he cursed under his breath, stopping still in his tracks.

"Excuse me," the man he'd bumped into said in a monotone. "I was not looking where I was going, it's my fault."

The voice was devoid of emotion, and Anders's eyes widened when he looked at the man's face. The look of surprise changed into one of horror as he recognized none other than his friend from Ferelden, Karl Thekla - the brand of the Chantry on his forehead.

Karl Thekla had been made Tranquil.

…

"Karl!" Anders exclaimed. "Why did they do this to you?"

"Anders," Karl replied. "I should not have written to you. The templars do not want us to correspond with apostates."

Karl turned to leave, but Anders grabbed his arm.

"If you do not let go, I will call the templars so that they finally catch you," Karl said calmly.

Anders let go of his arm quickly and stepped back, turning to run. He had completely forgotten that Hawke was with him and the only thing he could think of was to get as far from the Gallows as he could.

When he reached the docks, looking frantically for a boat to take him back to the other side of the bay, Hawke grabbed his arm and he turned around to face her for a few moments.

"Anders, calm down. There is no one following you. I checked myself," she said in a soothing tone.

"I need to get out of here," Anders shook his head. "And fast!"

Hawke paid for a boat to take them back and they boarded it and watched the Gallows as they crossed the bay in silence. As soon as they reached the docks on the other side, Anders got out and started to walk away quickly towards the lift that would take him down to Darktown with Hawke following close behind.

As soon as they reached the clinic, he unlocked one of the doors and rushed in, directly to his tiny room at the back.

"What are you doing?" Hawke asked when she saw him going through some things in a chest.

"I'm looking through my things to pack only what I need," he said in a hurry. "I need to get out of Kirkwall."

"What?!" Hawke exclaimed in a loud voice. "You're going to pack and leave just like that?"

He sighed and shook his head as Hawke knelt next to him, grabbing one of his arms.

"I can't stay," Anders replied. "I've stayed here far too long. The templars will find out where I am and capture me. I want to be free."

"So your solution to this is to run away and keep running for the rest of your life?" Hawke asked.

"What other solution is there? I've been running all my life. If they catch me now, they will brand me – make me Tranquil. Quite frankly, I like my emotions just fine, thankyouverymuch!"

"Because the templars run around Darktown looking for apostates all the time, don't they?" Hawke commented sarcastically.

"They do make their rounds here every now and then, but not very frequently. The refugees have been kind enough to hide me when that happens," Anders said, turning back to the chest.

"Stop that!" Hawke cried out, grabbing his arm again. She tugged rather hard, trying to pull him away. "You can't go!"

Anders stood up, breathing heavily as he tried to take her hand off his arm. "Why shouldn't I leave? What is keeping me here? Tell me why I should stay!"

"I can't go on the expedition without you! I need you…" Hawke said, choking at her words, her eyes shimmering with unshed tears.

"That's hardly a reason to stay," Anders said firmly, his eyes pleading for her to speak up.

"I – I can't do it without you! I won't!"

"Why?" Anders shot back. "Tell me what you don't want to say!"

"This is ridiculous!" Hawke cried, her grip tightening on his arm for a split second.

"Hawke…" Anders began but she immediately dropped his arm and took a step or two back, shaking her head.

"_You_ are a Grey Warden! _You_ can sense darkspawn, can't you?" she asked frantically. "I need your magic too! Bethany is still learning! I _need_ a healer!"

There was a hysterical note in her voice that both puzzled and pleased him - though he couldn't say why. He stepped closer to her and grabbed her by the waist, looking down at her with a mixture of longing and desire. Hawke stopped talking, her eyes widening slightly.

"No!" she said, violently disentangling herself from his grasp and taking two steps to the door. "We can't do this!"

"Why not?" Anders shot back at her. "Why can't we? Would it be so terrible if we did?"

"I – I don't want to hurt you," she replied, looking at the floor.

"Why would you hurt me? I –"

She interrupted his words, her eyes once again holding his. "Who was that man? I can see he was Tranquil, but who was he?"

Anders faltered, and blinked back at her question. He also felt himself getting annoyed. "He's…someone I know from the Circle in Ferelden. A…friend of mine. He and I had something back in Kinloch Hold. He was sent to the circle here and I sent him a letter, letting him know I was in Kirkwall. I didn't know what else to do or how to help him."

"I'm sorry," Hawke said quietly. "I know that being made Tranquil is terrible. Does he know you have a clinic in Darktown?"

Anders shook his head. "No. I never told him anything about that. I informed him I had arrived, and he wrote back, telling me how badly they treated the mages in the circle here. I never wrote a reply."

"Then the templars don't know where to look," Hawke said with a sigh of relief. "Even so, we'll leave for the Deep Roads very soon. If the templars come to Darktown again, you won't be here for a few weeks at the very least."

Anders paused, looking at her intently. He slowly came to realize what she had just done. She had cleverly maneuvered the conversation so that he focused on Karl instead of what he had just asked her. His annoyance quickly escalated to anger.

"I see what you've done here," Anders scowled. "You've refrained from answering my question, thinking I'd forget if we talked about something else that was important. I haven't forgotten! I want an answer!"

"I don't know what you mean," Hawke replied, her eyes flashing angrily for a split second.

"Then there is no point for me to stick around, is there?" Anders replied, the anger in his eyes evident as well. "I should leave as soon as possible!"

"Remember when Bethany said you reminded her of my Father?" Hawke snapped. "She was wrong!"

She turned around and left, disappearing into the shadows.

"Fuck!" Anders cried out angrily, lashing out with his fist against the wall. "Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!" He ground his teeth as he felt the bones in his hand break.

Sinking into his cot, he healed his hand and shook his head, all traces of his anger vanishing completely.

_I'm an idiot! I'm an idiot because I can't get her to trust me!_

He sighed, draping an arm over his eyes, suddenly tired of everything.

_I'm an idiot because I know I won't be able to leave…I just can't leave her!_

…


	7. Chapter 7

_**Let me start off by apologizing profusely for not updating sooner. My health and a bad case of writer's block prevented me from doing so. Also, I want to thank my lovely reviewers: Trilobiter, Apollo Wings, CouslandSpitFire and anesor for their lovely reviews and to all of you who have now included this fic in their favorites and are now following it. **_

_**A few things about this chapter: First of all, as this is mainly AU (or totally AU), I won't be following the events of the game regarding Anders and Hawke's romance. It's completely different in fact, as you may notice while you read this chapter. Secondly, I think the Deep Roads part at the beginning where they set off to find another route, was much longer than they make it to be in the game, so I'm including stops for them to eat and rest in this chapter and the next one as well. (Well, at least ONE stop). Also, Bartrand is an evil bastard in this fic, too. Just wanted to point that out, haha! **_

_**I hope you enjoy reading this! I hate the Deep Roads…and the only thing I hate more than the Deep Roads in the game is writing about it! :P **_

_**Sorry if there are any typos or spelling mistakes in this chapter! My lovely betas are very busy at the moment, so this is all me! :D **_

_**Also, please don't hesitate to PM me or write a review if you want to! I love feedback! :D**_

_**My disclaimer as usual: Bioware owns everything! I swear! :D**_

Chapter 7

Anders wasn't surprised to see both Varric and Isabela in his clinic a few days later. He knew that Hawke wouldn't go to the Deep Roads without him, even though they had fought and had both been angry at each other. He couldn't stay angry at her for long, however. Maker help him, he was actually hoping to see her soon in fact.

He was in the middle of healing an old woman whose granddaughter had brought over to the clinic. The granddaughter was a lovely redhead with freckles and a rack that made Isabela stare jealously and flirt with her as well.

Both Varric and Isabela stood very close to Anders watching his glowing hands go over the old lady, his brow furrowed and forehead covered in a light sheen of sweat.

"Do you mind?" Anders said through clenched teeth. "I need some space to work here!"

"Not on your life, Blondie," Varric whispered. "We were told not to be far from you. Frankly speaking I wouldn't have told her that you've escaped the circle seven times, she wants us to make sure that you aren't going anywhere."

"He didn't tell her that, I did!" Isabela said, now winking at the redhead with pouty lips.

"I saw her first!" Anders hissed at Isabela. "And thanks a lot, Isabela. I'll make it a point to _not_ tell you anything about my life ever again."

Anders squeezed his eyes shut, reaching into the Veil again and focusing completely on the old lady. He successfully managed to block everything else out, including Isabela's catty reply to him. The grandmother soon opened her eyes and smiled feebly at Anders who helped her up gently.

"Remember, keep her in bed. I'll be over tonight to see how she is doing, although I know she'll be just fine," Anders told the attractive redhead with a wink. The girl dissolved into giggles, thanking him profusely.

"I'll be expecting you, then and will thank you _properly_ when you arrive," the redhead promised as she left the clinic, holding her grandmother's arm tightly and leading the way. Anders watched her swaying hips with a smile.

"You lucky dog," Isabela whispered darkly beside him. "How you always get them to fall for you is a real mystery to me."

"I'm charming," Anders grinned.

"I hate to be the one to tell you this, but you won't be paying her a house call at all. We're leaving for the Deep Roads in two hours, and Hawke told us to bring you even if we had to tie you up," Varric sighed.

"What! I can't refuse to go there? Who does she think she is?" Anders demanded, heading towards his tiny room at the back to pack some potions and salves for the journey.

"She won't take 'no' for an answer," Isabela smiled, her eyes twinkling as she watched him pack extra smalls, soap and a towel.

"This is an outrage to freedom as we know it!" Anders proclaimed as he finished putting in some more things and closed his backpack with a grin.

Varric shook his head with a chuckle. "You know, both you and Hawke are meant for each other. You're both totally insane."

"Lead the way," Anders announced with a lopsided grin, swinging his backpack over his right shoulder and sheathing his staff. "I'm ready."

…

There were a couple of wooden wagons outside the Merchant's Guild that were being filled up with food and supplies. Anders followed Varric and Isabela inside and past a dwarf at a desk who was scribbling something away and did not even look up at them. They made their way down a corridor, past doors leading to other rooms and passages until they reached the end of the corridor. Varric then took a right and stopped in front of a set of huge double doors.

"Now don't say or do anything to interrupt what is going on, Blondie," Varric hurried to say. "Hawke and Bartrand are just going over details and studying the map you gave us."

"I'd _never_ interrupt," Anders protested with an innocent expression on his face.

Varric rolled his eyes and opened one of the doors, stepping inside a lavishly-furnished room. There was a fire burning in the huge fireplace against the left wall and a heavy wooden table with chairs right next to it. Anders followed Varric into the room, his heart somersaulting when he saw Hawke sitting at the table with a blond dwarf who sported a long braided beard. Isabela said goodbye, saying she had an appointment to keep and disappeared the way they had come.

Hawke did not look up, but a smile tugged on the corners of her mouth when she heard them entering the room. She then nodded to something Bartrand was saying. Sitting beside her, Anders noticed Bethany, who was looking up at him adoringly. He winked at the younger sister and she blushed, turning her head to the right.

Both Hawke and Bartrand continued talking about something in hushed tones. After a few moments, they shook hands and Hawke stood up, looking directly at Anders with a smile on her face. She walked slowly to where Varric and Anders were standing with Bethany close behind.

"I thought you were halfway to Tevinter by now," Hawke grinned at him happily, her eyes shining like twin stars.

"I don't like the mages there much," Anders quipped. "But the people here in Kirkwall are both extremely attractive and interesting to say the least."

Hawke burst out laughing. She was standing so close to Anders that he had to muster every ounce of willpower to keep himself from kissing her. She did not look away, but held his smoldering gaze.

"I'm glad you think so," she replied in a sultry tone.

"Is it suddenly hot in here or is it just me?" Varric interrupted. Hawke turned to the dwarf with a smile and winked.

"We're leaving shortly," Bartrand said as he walked towards the door. "You should pack up your things along with the rest of the stuff we're taking."

At that moment, Leandra Hawke entered the room. She looked totally flustered and blushed as she asked to speak to both Rhianna and Bethany. Bartrand agreed and walked out of the room, grumbling to himself.

Anders stepped away to give them privacy, but in a couple of minutes both of them couldn't help but hear the entire conversation as Leandra ended up crying stormily, begging Rhianna to leave her sister behind.

Bethany refused and Rhianna argued that she needed Bethany. Leandra had no other option but to leave after embracing her youngest daughter and giving Rhianna an accusatory glance. Rhianna looked away, her eyes falling on Anders, who was watching her closely. She shrugged and led them all outside, where they met with the rest.

"Personal drama over with?" Bartrand asked the sisters. Rhianna nodded, looking straight ahead, an uneasy feeling coming over her. "Good. Let's be on our way."

…

Anders hated the Deep Roads. Not only did it remind him of his fear of being in dark places, but also gave him a feeling of foreboding and despair. Being a naturally optimistic person, he had to struggle to overcome the fear and despair, which made it difficult for him to focus on happy thoughts. It was all a circle of unending unpleasantness to him.

"Are you all right?" Hawke asked, interrupting his thoughts. "You're sweating and you look a lot paler than usual."

He managed a weak smile and nodded. "Just my fear of dark, underground places. Nothing to worry about," he gave her a wooden smile. "I hate the Deep Roads."

The concern in Hawke's eyes was good to see. "Let me know if you need anything," she said. "I'm right here."

Anders gave her a genuine smile this time. "Beauty and compassion in the same package? I must be dreaming!"

"You must be…_better_," Hawke smiled. "You're joking again!"

One of the dwarves ran up to Bartrand to tell him the way into the deeper part of the Deep Roads was full of rocks and rubble. Apparently there had been a collapse that was blocking the way. Bartrand had a fit right then and there and ended up punching the unfortunate messenger.

"We'll check out the side passages for you and find another way through," Hawke offered. Anders groaned at these words and fidgeted nervously.

_Of course she would say that. Why wouldn't she? She loves killing stuff after all…_

Bodahn, the merchant who was traveling with them came up to them wringing his hands nervously, a sad expression on his face. He then informed them that his son Sandal was lost. Apparently, Sandal had disappeared into one of the side passages. Hawke promised to find Sandal and bring him back. She turned and glanced at Anders who was looking properly horrified. She stepped up closer to him and without thinking, took his hand.

"You look really scared. Is there anything I should know?"

Anders looked down dumbly at her small hand now intertwined with his. Her touch was firm and soft at the same time.

_Am I dreaming?_

"Anders?" Hawke's voice cut through his thoughts again.

"Oh! Um…I might as well tell you the whole story. You know I escaped the Circle of Magi seven times," Anders began, looking deeply into her eyes. "Well, the sixth time I escaped, when I was captured I was put into solitary confinement for a year in a dark dungeon. No human contact whatsoever," he shuddered and Hawke gave his hand a gentle squeeze. He smiled and carried on. "I did have company, though. The circle mouser, Mr. Wiggums. Poor Mr. Wiggums. He turned into a rage demon and was killed by one of the templars…"

"We need to get going if we want to find a way through," Varric interrupted. Hawke dropped Anders's hand and nodded, leading the way.

"Gee, thanks Varric," Anders whispered to the dwarf. "Don't you want to win the bet?"

"Shit! I had forgotten all about that, Blondie! Although with you two, it's hard to say who will cave in first…interruptions or no!"

…

They were ambushed by several groups of darkspawn along the way. Anders was mildly happy this happened, as he was able to focus on the fighting which helped him overcome his claustrophobia and desperation. After having dispatched a rather large group of darkspawn, Hawke announced they would be setting up camp to rest for a few hours and get something to eat.

Even though the ground was actually a stone floor, they managed to find coal in abundance and Anders lit the braziers that were still standing in that particular area. Hawke also managed to arrange some pieces of left-over wood she had found in the rubble along with some coal and they soon were all sitting around a fire of sorts.

Bethany got a pot out and reached into the Veil to bend the air and elemental forces around her and great chunks of ice appeared inside the pot. She smiled as she focused on some fire next and the ice melted and turned to water. Both Varric and Bethany then busied themselves cooking a vegetable soup with the vegetables they had brought along for the journey, while Anders left heading towards an underground spring that snaked around their makeshift camp.

Hawke watched Anders go, her violet eyes glinting eerily in the half-light. Varric smiled to himself and sat beside her as the soup bubbled in the pot over the hot coals and the fire.

"He looks better than he did when we first entered the Deep Roads," Varric commented.

Hawke started, lowering her gaze immediately. "He certainly does."

For a while, no one spoke. Bethany stirred the contents in the pot and both Varric and Hawke seemed to be lost in thought.

"Well, I'm actually relieved that you two have apparently gotten over your differences. Especially since he seems to adore the ground you walk on…" Varric finally said.

Hawke seemed taken aback and could only blink at him repeatedly. She quickly recovered however.

"I don't – understand what you mean…"

"Oh, come now, Hawke. I'm not Anders. You don't have to pretend with me," Varric chuckled.

Hawke shook her head a little more violently than was necessary. "You of all people know better than to tell me these things, Varric." She looked sad and Varric frowned, glancing down into the fire for a few seconds.

"I don't see where anything could possibly go wrong – "

"You _know_ he'll only end up getting hurt or worse, so drop it," Rhianna interrupted, getting up and stretching. "I think I'll set up the tents."

Anders arrived from his bath, smiling and looking relaxed. "Need any help with that?" he asked Hawke with a grin.

"I can manage, though you're more than welcome to help," Rhianna smiled.

Varric could only smile as he watched them from the fire. The bond that was quickly forming between them both was certainly interesting to watch. It was becoming really difficult to see who would jump who at this point.

They were both falling head over heels in love with each other even if they both denied it.

And Andraste's tits, did they ever deny it!

…

They encountered giant spiders that made Anders want to run away screaming in terror. When a monstrous spider fell from the ceiling and attacked Rhianna, he forgot about being scared and fought with everything he got. He was gulping down the lyrium potions like water for that fight, if only to heal Hawke over and over.

They also found Sandal and were pleasantly surprised to see he was surrounded by dozens upon dozens of darkspawn corpses. The boy was a bit simple, but Anders could feel something different about him, something he couldn't quite put his finger on…almost as if there was hidden magic working inside him. The point of the matter was that Anders was quite intrigued by him and made a mental note to get to Hightown more often to study the boy closely.

There were more rooms with locked chests and stupid loot inside. Anders blinked back at Hawke with a grin when she discovered 'torn trousers number ten' inside one of them.

"I'm guessing you can sew them all together to make a new tent?" he offered hopefully.

Hawke rolled her eyes and chuckled throwing the offending trousers to the side, like she had done with the other nine pairs. They advanced into the ruins, and soon came upon a vast chamber. They all stood at the entrance, completely dumbfounded.

The ceiling was nowhere to be seen. Literally. Anders tilted his head back as he peered up into total darkness. He then turned his head down to glare at Varric.

"You guys are dwarves. D – W – A – R – V – E – S. Why did you want to build everything so tall and high in the first place?" he complained.

"Shit, don't look at me, Blondie! I wasn't even born in Orzammar! Personally, I think all my ancestors were insane," Varric retorted.

"Shhh!" Hawke said. "Quiet everyone! I thought I heard something!"

"I heard it, too," Bethany whispered, but loud enough for everyone to hear. "Sounded like…flapping…"

"Flapping?" Anders asked with a sinking feeling. "Like wings?"

They heard a roar that echoed across the vast room and a huge dragon dropped down from wherever the damn ceiling was to face them, breathing fire. The stone ground actually shook a bit when it landed.

"What in blazes is a DRAGON doing _here_ of all places?" Hawke complained, whisking out her daggers.

"Oh, champion! I always wanted to be roasted alive!" Anders shouted already dipping into the Veil for ice in huge quantities.

A lithe figure dressed in robes yelled at the dragon from the far end of the room. Anders frowned as he hurled his first strong spell of ice at the dragon and Hawke leaped forward, slashing at its frozen form.

"You shall not win, you foul creature!" the figure – all cracked and glowing blue – now bellowed in a strange booming voice. Anders's eyes widened with surprise when he saw that it was an elven woman with blond hair and a staff in her hand.

Things could not get any better: a dragon and Velanna were in the same room.

_We're all going to die! _

…


	8. Chapter 8

_**Thanks SO much BlessedArrow, Apollo Wings, anesor, Morninglight and CouslandSpitFire for your awesome reviews! I'd also like to thank those of you following the story and those who have put it on your list of favorites! :D Ice cream for everyone who has! :D **_

_**A few things about this chapter: Velanna is even more insane AND Hawke and Anders draw closer. YES! It's not all about smexy, smut, ok? LOL! **_

_**Huge thanks to my WONDERFUL betas, Eynla and CouslandSpitFire! You two ladies ROCK! :D **_

_**My disclaimer: Bioware owns! I just play with the characters! :D **_

Chapter 8

The fight was brutal – there was no other word to describe it.

Anders had been in other terrible fights with dragons before, sure. But this one was _huge_: the dragon was _huge_…and had a _huge_ number of dragonlings backing it up that appeared and attacked as well. Of course, they had three mages on their side – powerful magic was good – but Velanna hardly counted. She was flinging fireballs like they were flowers, not caring if they burned every single _person_ in Anders's group. Anders soon lost count of the number of times he had to stop his offensive attack in order to heal Hawke's burns. And Varric's. And Bethany's. He was consuming a lot of lyrium potions and feverishly hoped that he had enough to last him the entire fight.

The dragonlings were sneaky, even though they weren't that hard to kill. The problem was that they continued to seemingly materialize out of nowhere – the room they were in was incredibly large and Anders couldn't see a way out from where he was standing. The fiends attacked repeatedly without warning and had a knack for suddenly appearing behind you when you least expected it.

Unpleasant, to say the least.

The first real relief he experienced was when Hawke finally ran up the huge mother dragon's back and sliced it below the neck. The blood gushed out everywhere, spattering all of them, but the dragon went down.

_Andraste's tits! I'll have to get new robes now! And…boots!…Again!_

There were about two dozen dragonlings left, thank the Maker! One minute the creatures were all moving to face the whole group. Then, after another one of Velanna's fireballs, the remaining dragonlings suddenly decided Velanna was a major threat and all of them turned and ran to her, viciously attacking at once.

She went down after killing another three.

Hawke did what Anders thought she would do…she ran off to help Velanna.

Anders groaned and sprinted after her, followed by Varric. Bethany had already reached a spot that was closer to Velanna and had flung her first offensive fireball at some of the dragonlings, which were almost instantly burned to a crisp.

_Ha! I don't think Velanna will appreciate that there is a mage whose fireballs are more dangerous than hers! _

He suddenly realized what he was thinking and burst out laughing as he finally reached the area where Bethany was standing. Bethany turned a puzzled look at him, but Anders shook his head and waved her off, still laughing as he used his staff on the creatures, a lightning bolt hitting the ones that were closer to Hawke.

Meanwhile, Hawke had literally cut her way to where Velanna's quiet form lay, and thanks to Bethany and Anders, most of the dragonlings were dying very quickly. Varric did a number with Bianca that had the rest of them slowing to a crawl, which Hawke made short work of as she became a blur, vanishing and reappearing to quickly and effectively slash as many as she could.

When there were only a few left, she actually laughed manically, which at the moment made Anders laugh again in spite of the seriousness of the situation. He quickly flung a powerful ice spell on the surviving creatures, making it easy for her to finish them off.

Velanna was still unconscious and Anders finally took a good look at her, noticing that she was not glowing blue any more. She looked very peaceful and harmless in fact, since she wasn't snarling at all. But Anders knew she would certainly snarl - and worse - when she came to, so he quickly grabbed Hawke's arm and pulled her away from the figure on the stone floor.

"Remember the insane Dalish elf I was telling you about?" he said in a rush, the words tumbling out. "That's her!"

"_This_ is the elf you were referring to from the time when you were with the Wardens in Amaranthine?" Rhianna asked curiously and rather incredulously, Anders thought.

Anders could only nod at her words.

"Whatever she is, she needs to be healed," Hawke said firmly.

"I don't think you understand what I'm –"Anders began, his throat suddenly becoming dry when he realized that Rhianna would not change her mind.

Her violet eyes were now firmly and angrily fixed on his brown ones and they spoke volumes. Worse, Bethany was now kneeling in front of the delicate unconscious form on the floor, and she was already trying to heal Velanna. At the same time, Varric was saying something behind him that sounded like "I can't believe you won't heal her, Blondie!"

Anders turned his head to stare at Varric for a few moments. "Varric, this is _NOT_ Merrill! She is _nothing_ like her!"

A moan came from the unconscious form and Anders saw Hawke digging in her backpack for a health poultice. He shook his head and grabbed her arm again.

Without saying a word, he knelt beside the bleeding Velanna, and ran his hands over her; the golden glow emanating from his fingers growing in intensity as the open wounds magically stitched themselves together. Within minutes, he had successfully stopped the bleeding, and he poured out more healing magic into her to heal her burns. He noticed something else while he was working on her, too. There was something there – a force he did not quite understand.

Frowning when he was done, he stood up and faced Hawke. "Something is _off_ about her. I can't quite understand what it is…"

"But you've healed her, right?" Hawke asked, clearly concerned.

"Yes. I've done what I could for her now, but she's lost a great deal of blood. In order for her to be completely healed, I'll have to watch over her and heal her repeatedly until she comes to. I suggest we set up camp here for the moment," Anders said, resigning himself to the fact that Velanna had successfully duped Hawke, Varric and Bethany. "After I've rested and eaten, my mana will regenerate completely and I'll be able to apply more healing magic so that she recuperates faster."

What Hawke did after he said those words totally surprised him, huge butterflies coming to life somewhere inside his stomach and his knees suddenly feeling weak. She stood on her toes and kissed his cheek, her violet eyes shining at him like twin stars.

Anders didn't think twice about what he did next. He swept her up into his arms and captured her lips in his.

She was so surprised at this that she froze, but after a few moments her lips parted softly and she kissed him back with such fervor and passion that he tightened his grip on her slightly. The kiss was everything he had imagined it to be and so much more. But then, without prior warning, she inexplicably broke away panting a little and hurriedly disentangled herself from his arms, her eyes wide with…was that _fear_? _What the heck is she so afraid of?_

"Why did you go and do _that_ for?" she demanded, her eyes flashing angrily for a few moments. "Don't you understand what 'no' means?"

Without waiting for a reply from a stunned Anders, she quickly turned on her heel and walked away, only to throw her backpack to the ground and start setting up the tents without a backwards glance at any of them.

Anders felt slightly dismayed at her reaction, but could not utter a word. He just sighed and turned to reach for his backpack that was now lying on the stone floor behind him, his eyes momentarily falling on Varric who was staring at him with open annoyance.

"What the fuck are _you_ so upset about?" he asked, slightly nettled.

"I lost! Thanks a lot, Blondie!" Varric sighed as he walked off towards Hawke to help her with the tents.

…

Anders never thought that he would ever find himself in the position he was in at the moment. During the long hours that dragged silently on, he sat beside Velanna, periodically pouring healing magic into her. She did not seem even close to opening her eyes, so he took a break, his eyes automatically looking for Hawke in the makeshift camp they had set up.

He saw that she was walking towards him with a bowl of food, soup most likely, and smiled as she handed the bowl over to him. He didn't say a word until the bowl was securely in his hands: he didn't want hot soup all over him if he said anything to upset her.

"I'm…um…sorry to have offended you," he murmured as he started on the soup, keeping his eyes on the bowl for the time being.

When Hawke didn't reply, he looked up to glance at her. She was sitting in front of him, staring down at Velanna.

"What's the story behind her?" she asked quietly, her eyes still on the unconscious Velanna. "I want to know the whole truth."

"The Warden-Commander took a group of us to the Wending Wood, a forest near Amaranthine, to figure out why merchant caravans using the road that cuts through it were attacked there. When we arrived, and after battling some bandits, we discovered that it was a woman," Anders gestured towards Velanna, "…um…it was _she,_ who was responsible for the attacks. She attacked us, too, of course. We were human, you see. Well, everyone except for Sigrun, who's a dwarf." Anders finished his soup, his warm brown eyes fixed on Hawke.

"Was there another reason for her attacking everyone besides the fact that the Dalish generally hate humans?" Hawke asked.

"There was, actually," Anders nodded setting down the empty bowl in front of him. "There was a Dalish camp there, but most of them fled as the darkspawn entered the forest and lingered around. She thought that the humans had attacked the Dalish and had taken her sister. She was wrong. The darkspawn had planted some weapons at her camp to make her believe this. So, she attacked every single person she could, until the Warden-Commander showed her an Elven trinket she had found on one of the darkspawn. The Warden-Commander asked her if there was any underground place where the darkspawn could be hiding out and she replied there was an abandoned silverite mine not too far away. Then she asked to come with us. She wanted to help us because her sister was missing, and she was convinced the darkspawn had taken her. The Warden-Commander agreed and she joined our party. Personally, I thought the Warden-Commander was crazy when she let her join us."

"I hope you didn't tell the Warden-Commander that you thought she was crazy?" Hawke asked with a smile.

"Oh, no. The Warden-Commander would have laughed if I said that anyway. She's the Queen of Ferelden – she married King Alistair, who also is a Grey Warden," Anders grinned.

Hawke nodded with another smile. "I know that they were the ones who stopped the Blight. The Warden-Commander killed the Archdemon, didn't she?"

"Yes, she did. She dragged me along everywhere while she was in Amaranthine. You remind me of her, as a matter of fact," Anders chuckled.

"Really?" Hawke finally turned to look at him.

"Yes. She was also a rogue, like you. You fight almost the same way she does. Of course, she didn't have a death wish like you. Well, not one as _pronounced_ as yours," he added thoughtfully.

"I do _not_ have a death wish!" Rhianna protested.

"I beg to differ," Anders replied calmly with a grin. "I think you do. And a HUGE death wish as a matter of fact. But I digress," he said as he glanced over to Velanna who was still out cold. "The fact of the matter was that in the end, Velanna wished to become a Grey Warden and fight the darkspawn. We eventually _did_ run into her sister. But her sister was ensnared by the Architect and looked like she was a half-ghoul to everyone, too. She had already been…tainted."

"The Architect?" Hawke asked interestedly.

"He was the first of the talking darkspawn. A powerful emissary, which is really a fancy word for 'darkspawn mage'. He led a faction of darkspawn. The Warden-Commander killed him and The Mother, who was the leader of another faction of darkspawn. These two factions were at war with each other after the Blight."

"I've never heard of darkspawn fighting each other," Hawke muttered with interest.

"We never had either," Anders smiled. "Unfortunately, the Architect's plan was a little shady, and so we never saw Velanna's sister again after the Warden-Commander killed the Architect. Velanna was angry at the Warden-Commander for some time, but they actually did manage to work out their differences. Then the Warden-Commander had to leave to return back to court, and the new Warden-Commander arrived from Orlais."

"An Orlesian Warden-Commander in Ferelden? I'm sure many resented that," Hawke commented, her eyes twinkling now.

"Oh, yes, I'm sure they did," Anders gave her a lopsided grin. "But the worse thing he could have done was to call for templars to watch over the mages in the Keep. Five templars as a matter of fact! Since Velanna and myself were the only mages around, well…you can imagine our reactions!"

"You attacked the Templars?" Hawke asked, her eyes widening slightly.

"Me? No! I happen to like living, thankyouverymuch!" Anders was quick to reply and Hawke chuckled at his response. He then grew serious, although his eyes were still twinkling. "Velanna, however, reacted very badly. Especially since the new Warden-Commander had just finished telling us that we could only cast magic while we were fighting and that magic was essentially a curse."

Anders shook his head and sighed.

"Ugh! So he was one of _them_!" Hawke said looking a bit annoyed.

Anders laughed. "If by '_one of them_' you mean a twit, yes! He was! He was also an idiot, but I'm sure you've figured that one out on your own by now."

Hawke burst out laughing and Anders laughed along with her.

After a while, he continued to speak. "The new Warden-Commander also wanted me to get rid of my cat. I took him off my Satinalia gift list for that!"

"I thought Mr. Wiggums died?" Hawke asked with a chuckle.

"Oh, no! Not Mr. Wiggums. The Warden-Commander, um…the _Queen of Ferelden_ Warden-Commander, gave me a cat in Amaranthine. I called him Ser Pounce-a-lot. The new Warden-Commander said he made me too soft," Anders frowned. "He was such a brave cat! He scratched a Genlock in the Deep Roads once and actually drew blood!"

"Did he die, too?"

"No. I had to…give him to a friend in Amaranthine, because I kind of left in a hurry," Anders said sadly, remembering his goodbye to Pounce.

"What do you mean, you _kind of_ left in a hurry?" Hawke asked curiously.

"Well, the –"

At that moment, Velanna sighed and stirred – a smile on her lips as she opened her eyes. Anders froze and looked down at her and Rhianna did the same. Velanna's eyes widened when she saw them and she sat up, looking around for her staff, a totally confused expression on her face.

"Uh, oh!" Anders said, standing up quickly and pulling Hawke up, then pushing her behind him protectively.

_Now why did I just do _**that**_? _

Hawke started to protest, but Velanna suddenly adopted a defensive pose as she faced them both, her hands suddenly extending to the sky as she reached into the Veil. Anders and Hawke found themselves ensnared in roots that had sprouted from the ground, breaking through the stone floor. Velanna spied her staff, lying on the ground a short distance away and ran to it, grabbing it just as Bethany and Varric, who were sitting around the fire in front of the tents, stood up and ran towards them.

"Prepare to die!" she snarled at the four of them, pointing her staff at each one in turn.

"I told you she was crazy," Anders said to Hawke as he struggled to break through the roots. "No one ever listens!"

…


	9. Chapter 9

_**Thank you so much Eynla, GryphonFeather II, Morninglight, CouslandSpitFire and anesor for your awesome reviews! Special thanks to those of you who have put this fic in your favorites and those who are now following! :D **_

_**I also want to thank my lovely betas, CouslandSpitFire and Eynla for helping me out with this chapter! You girls rock! **_

_**Before I forget AGAIN, the name for my Hawke was suggested by a friend of mine, Callia/LadyDarksbane. I want to take the moment here to thank her so much for her help in this, because in my case, I always choose the same names for my Hawkes, and wanted something totally different! :D **_

_**My disclaimer as always: Bioware owns! :D **_

Chapter 9

"Velanna!" Anders yelled, still struggling to free himself. "It's Anders! Don't you remember me?"

Velanna was pointing her staff directly at Bethany and Varric. She gave no indication whatsoever that she had heard Anders.

Varric had Bianca out in front of him and was wearing his no-nonsense face. Bethany had placed her staff on the ground and was holding up her hands in front of her, palms facing Velanna and a pleading look in her eyes.

"We aren't going to hurt you!" Bethany exclaimed. "We just saved your life! Don't you remember you were attacked by dragonlings?"

"Silence!" Velanna screamed. She then turned at glanced at Anders. "What are you doing here, Anders? I thought you hated the Deep Roads!"

"I could ask you the same thing, but I'm afraid of getting burned, Velanna," Anders said. "I'm already a human tree…"

"Stop joking," Hawke hissed right next to him. "And stop giving her ideas!"

"Play along. I know her…or at least I _hope_ I do," Anders whispered back.

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?" Hawke asked in a low voice.

"You know very well what I'm doing in the Deep Roads, Anders! Your pathetic Warden-Commander made sure I would never find my sister, didn't she?" Velanna spat. "Well, I'll just continue to look!"

"_My_ Warden-Commander?" Anders started saying, but Hawke elbowed him and he was instantly quiet.

"If you say anything else, Anders, I swear I'll hit you!" Hawke hissed into his ear. "You'll only make her angry!"

"She isn't angry now?" Anders whispered back. "Huh! I could have sworn she is!"

"Listen!" Varric said, putting down Bianca in front of him. Velanna regarded the dwarf suspiciously. "We don't want to hurt you. We just want to talk…"

"You are one of the Children of the Stone. What are you doing with these shemlen?"

"I'm their friend," Varric said with a hint of a smile. "Why would you want to attack us if we just saved your life?"

Velanna lowered her staff a few inches, her blue eyes fixed on Varric. "I – I don't trust humans. I believed in one once. And she betrayed me!"

"How did she betray you?" Varric asked, genuinely interested.

Anders sighed heavily. "He shouldn't have asked that," he whispered to Hawke.

Velanna's brow furrowed angrily. "Because she killed the Architect! And the Architect was the only one who could take me to my sister! You ask too many questions!"

"I'm a storyteller," Varric grinned. "I'm inquisitive by nature."

"Velanna!" Anders called out. "Do you truly believe the Architect would have given you your sister back? Don't you remember what happened in the silverite mine? Don't you remember what happened at Drake's Fall? Do you –"

"Silence!" Velanna cried out her skin starting to crack open, blue light filtering from the cracks. Her eyes suddenly started to glow blue as well.

Anders stared at her, unable to talk.

"We aren't trying to upset you. We helped you a few moments ago," Hawke said quietly.

"I had everything under control!" Velanna spoke in a guttural, booming voice.

"Yes, you did! That's why you almost died, right?" Anders retorted, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

"You never could keep your mouth shut, could you?" Velanna boomed at him. "Where is that feline of yours you carried around? Where is your slave? Or did you finally allow him to be free?"

Anders's eyes widened in shock and he gasped. "I can't believe this! Justice? Is that you?"

As suddenly as the blue glowing light had appeared, it suddenly disappeared. Velanna shook her head and then her shoulders drooped slightly. With a flick of her hand she released both Anders and Hawke, the roots suddenly disappearing. Hawke toppled over Anders who caught her in his arms to keep her from falling.

"Yes. Justice and I merged before the templars arrived to control us at the Keep," Velanna eventually said, her voice tired. "He promised to help me find Seranni. I promised him to aid him, too. He has his own reasons for merging with me. Reasons I cannot and will not reveal…"

"Justice?" Hawke asked curiously. "What the fuck is going on here?

"Something you should _not_ ask about, shemlen!" Velanna hissed at Hawke. "You know nothing of what it means to be an elf, enslaved in an alienage! You know nothing of Chantry templars who try to control people who are born with the gift of magic!"

"You're right. I don't," Hawke replied. "But my sister Bethany is a mage and lives in constant fear of the templars taking her to the circle. My father was an apostate mage, he escaped from the Circle. I've spent my whole life protecting my sister from the templars. I understand what you're talking about."

Velanna's eyes widened slightly and she shook her head again. She glanced at Anders ever so quickly and frowned. "I appreciate your aid with the dragonlings. I'll leave you be."

Velanna turned and walked away. Hawke advanced a few steps and called out to her eliciting a groan from Anders who was standing behind her.

"Wait! Where are you going?"

"I'm going to find my sister," Velanna replied without looking back. "And I hope, for your sake and mine, that we never see each other again."

She disappeared into the darkness and Hawke stopped in her tracks.

"I think it's time to tell me all about Justice," Rhianna turned to look at Anders. Both Bethany and Varric stood behind Anders, waiting for him to speak.

"Well then, I suggest we all sit down. It's not a very short story!" Anders smiled.

…

After having told Hawke, Varric and Bethany about Justice, Anders suggested they move on. They discovered a flight of stairs leading up to another path. Varric smiled and said that this was the way and that they had found a side route for Bartrand. So they all returned to Bartrand with the good news. Bartrand was exceedingly grumpy, as Hawke and her group had spent slightly over three days looking for a side road that had not collapsed.

"Your brother is annoyingly rude," Anders commented.

"No shit, Blondie!" Varric sighed. "At least when he's busy doing something he isn't so bad!"

They passed Bodahn and Sandal and he stopped Rhianna and shook her hand repeatedly, overjoyed that Sandal had returned to him unharmed.

"You found him and showed him the way back! I've been waiting for you to return, Serah, to express my thanks!" Bodahn cried out with emotion. "I'll find a way to repay you, Messere! I swear!"

Hawke blushed a little and Anders's heart did its stupid somersaulting all over again.

"You don't have to thank me. I'm just glad Sandal was alive and I could help," Rhianna smiled, her rosy cheeks an indication of how she really felt about the whole thing.

"Say 'thank you' to the nice lady, Sandal, for saving your life," Bodahn said to Sandal.

Sandal's lower lip wobbled. "Thank you."

Hawke smiled and gave him some of their weapons to enchant. She also looked through the supply chest and found more lyrium potions, which she readily paid for.

They walked on with Bartrand and the rest of the workers until they reached a weird-looking thaig. The walls were covered with glowing blue and red lyrium. Anders felt slightly dizzy.

"So much lyrium around here makes me want to hit something," he said under his breath.

"Holy shit!" Varric commented.

Hawke turned to Bartrand. "Is this what you expected to find?"

"I thought a lost thaig…something worth the find. But this? What _is_ this?" Bartrand said in awe.

"How did you ever know about this place?" Hawke asked.

"Old scavenger tales," Bartrand replied, still staring at the scenery before him. "A week below the surface, they said. But nobody believed them…"

"Looks like they were right!" Varric exclaimed.

Bartrand ordered everyone to set up camp and Hawke walked over to where Bartrand was standing. They started talking about the thaig, and Anders stood by, feeling the hum of the lyrium nearby. Some of the workers had already started to hack away at the raw lyrium in the walls. If they didn't find anything here, the lyrium itself was worth a fortune, as it was sometimes sold illegally in quantities by dwarves and smugglers alike.

Soon, they decided to explore the ruins further in and Hawke let Bartrand know what they were going to do. Then the group went down a flight of stairs and was promptly attacked by a golem and several shades.

It didn't take long for Anders to freeze the golem solid and reach into the Veil for his electricity spells to disable the shades. Hawke slashed through them, finishing them off.

"There's a door down there. This is going to be fun!" Hawke called out to the rest, nearly skipping to the great metal door happily.

"Famous last words," Anders sighed behind her.

…

_MAKER HELP US! This is just fantastic! Varric's brother shut us in this stupid room. And now we have to find another way out. The stupid Dwarven door doesn't open from the inside. Inside as in 'where we are now'. INSIDE the stupid room with the altar where we found the stupid idol made of stupid lyrium. _

_Stupid._

"'_Stupid Bartrand took the stupid idol!'_" Hawke read over his shoulder. Anders slammed the journal shut.

"This is private!" he said between clenched teeth.

"Then write when I'm asleep," Hawke grinned. "Personally I think it's cute you keep a diary! My sister keeps one as well!"

"This is NOT a diary! It is a JOURNAL!" Anders retorted, looking slightly miffed. "And I use it to preserve my mental health!"

Hawke burst out laughing and Anders glared at her.

"Did you write anything about me?" she finally asked, still giggling.

"What? No!" Anders retorted, his cheeks a bright pink.

"Hahaha! You did!" Hawke teased, reaching for the journal. "Let me see!"

"No! This is PRIVATE! It isn't some book I'm writing!" Anders protested in a loud voice as he held it high above his head.

"Hey, Blondie!" Varric shouted from where he sat. "Just show her so I can add it to my story."

Anders shoved the book into his backpack, glaring at Varric. Bethany suppressed a giggle and gazed at Anders and Rhianna with twinkling eyes.

"You're doomed now, Anders," Bethany chuckled. "She won't give it a rest until she reads it."

"Why don't we just continue to try to find a way out? I don't want to die here," Anders said, still very much annoyed.

"There's a door over there on the left. I have a feeling whatever is behind it must be hostile! Let's go kill something!" Hawke exclaimed happily, as she sprang to her feet.

"Ah, 'Killer Hawke' is back. What joy," Anders deadpanned.

She opened the door to reveal another stone golem and more shades. Anders groaned inwardly.

_Golems and shades must really get along with each other! They're always together!_

"Use ice spells, Bethany!" he called out. "If the golem is frozen, he'll be easier to destroy!"

"Yes!" Bethany had already cast one of her stronger ice spells on the creature and Anders followed suit. Meanwhile, Varric used his crossbow to shower the shades with arrows, stopping them in their tracks. Anders smiled, readying an electric bolt that would jump from shade to shade, as Hawke literally whizzed around each enemy slicing into each one quickly.

The shades kept coming. Bethany reached into the Veil for fire. The fire fell upon the creatures like a firestorm, the fiery explosions finishing them off. Hawke yelped, jumping out of the way. "You could have warned me, you know!" she yelled.

"Sorry, sister!" Bethany shouted back, running forward to inspect Hawke's burns.

The shades were dispatched and Anders stepped forward to heal Hawke. Bethany stepped away, looking worried.

"Anything wrong, Sunshine?" Varric asked.

"No…no, nothing," Bethany stammered, shaking her head.

But Varric could not shake the feeling that she was lying.

…

They ran into some strange creatures next. The stones scraped on the floor as they formed: creatures made of stone, which had a glowing skeletal interior. Nobody knew what they were, but Varric suspected they were rock wraiths. The creatures used electricity and Anders immediately knew that he couldn't use his own electricity spells to harm them so he fought them off with ice. Bethany used fire and ice as well, and they fortunately were able to finish them off.

They stopped to set up their tents and had something to eat.

"So, any story you'd like to share of Amaranthine?" Varric asked Anders eagerly.

"I've already told you about Velanna and Justice. What else would you like to hear?" Anders said munching on some ham and cheese at intervals.

"If you keep on eating like this, we'll be full out of rations before we can find a way out," Hawke said with a disapproving look.

"I'm so sorry!" Anders said, as he wrapped up their provisions. "It's my Warden appetite." He focused on a spell that conjured up ice shards and soon the ham was encrusted with ice crystals before he stashed it in the backpack they used for food.

"I hear they have a lot of appetite for other things and the stamina for them as well," Hawke commented in a sultry voice.

Anders grinned, his eyebrows shooting upwards. "I can show you if you'd like," he kept his voice as low as he could, but Varric chuckled and shook his head.

"You two are so much alike, it's unreal," Varric commented. "Hawke, if you don't want Anders to kiss you again, stop flirting!"

"It's impossible to do that sometimes, Varric," Hawke replied with a grin. "It's in my nature."

"A girl after my own heart, then," Anders teased.

"Well, let's catch some sleep. We'll need to rest to continue our trek tomorrow!" Rhianna stood, stretching before she headed towards her tent. "Varric, why don't you keep watch with Anders for the first couple of hours?"

"I'll keep watch with Varric," Bethany offered. "I'm…not very sleepy!"

Rhianna glanced up at Bethany and her smile vanished.

"You look so pale, sister. Are you all right?" She asked with a worried frown.

"I'm just tired, Rhianna, don't worry about me," Bethany responded, giving her the smallest of smiles. "Go, get your rest. I'll be fine!"

Hawke could only frown as she once again felt the uneasiness she had felt when her mother had given her that accusatory glance before they had even set off on their journey.

There was something amiss with Bethany and she didn't like it one bit.

…

Anders woke her for the second watch and she smiled and stretched on her bedroll.

"Bethany has already gone into her tent," he informed her. "Varric is lying on a bedroll just outside it."

She followed him out of the tent, sitting around the small fire on the floor. Varric had managed to find more coal and wood from broken crates at the side of the road, so Anders fed that to the flames and the fire flared up for a moment. He looked a bit pensive when Rhianna sat next to him, a small smile on his lips.

"Bethany doesn't look so good. I…ah…woke up before their watch was over and offered to examine her but she didn't let me," Anders said in a low voice. "I'm kind of worried about her."

"I noticed that too," Rhianna was quick to respond. "I hope it isn't anything serious. Mother would kill me if anything happened to her."

Anders shook his head, then glanced at Rhianna. "I daresay you wouldn't forgive yourself, either," he commented, pushing the last piece of wood into the fire, which was already dying down. He glanced around and found one of the braziers that adorned the thaig they were travelling through from time to time, and stood up, walking towards it. He used magic to light it. At least they would not be left in complete darkness when the fire died out.

He walked back to Rhianna and sat next to her, a smile on his face.

"Those things we've been fighting. They're harder to kill, but they must have a weakness," Rhianna commented.

"They do. Apparently, ice can damage them far more than I've seen it damage any other creature. Fire doesn't as much," Anders responded.

"Do you think there is a way out of here?" Rhianna asked wistfully.

"Oh, yes. I'm convinced in fact," Anders replied. "The Dwarves must have built another exit or entrance into this thaig."

"Well, I hope you're right," Rhianna said. "Who knows how long we've been in here already. You can't really tell if you can't see the sun."

"True," Anders replied with a frown. "We can only guess."

They both fell silent and then Hawke turned to him with an inquisitive look.

"So, what other companions did you have back in Amaranthine?" she asked curiously with a smile. "I'm sure Justice in Kristoff's body and Velanna weren't the only ones."

Anders laughed and shook his head. "No, you're right. Well, let's see. There was Sigrun. She was a Dwarf and in the Legion of the Dead."

"Legion of the Dead?" Hawke asked.

"Yes. It's a group of warriors and casteless dwarves in Orzammar who bond together to fight the darkspawn and defend Orzammar. It's like a military organization and they accept anyone in their ranks. We travelled to a long lost thaig called Kal'Hirol with Sigrun. We found out that there were two factions of darkspawn battling each other there. We also discovered a broodmother nest and the Warden-Commander killed them all by breaking the chains that held a massive lyrium storage container above them. When the chains were broken, the heavy container fell on the broodmothers and crushed them."

"What are broodmothers?" Hawke asked.

"Darkspawn monsters," Anders frowned. "I'll not say anything else, as it's a very disagreeable topic. Don't you want to find out more about me, for example?" He wiggled his eyebrows.

Hawke burst out laughing. "You just don't know when to stop, do you?"

"Neither do you," Anders shot back quickly with a grin.

"Well, at least tell me about the Architect and the Mother then?" Hawke said, her violet eyes twinkling.

"You really want to know, don't you? How about if I tell you about my seven escapes from the Circle? Would that do instead?" Anders chuckled.

"That sounds interesting too!" Hawke agreed. "All right. Tell me about your escapes and then you can tell me more about what happened in Amaranthine, deal?"

"Deal," Anders responded as he stretched his legs out in front of him and began his tale.

They never noticed the fire had died down and the red-orange glowing embers of the coals were the only things that were keeping them warm. They talked and laughed quietly for a very long time. Hawke also opened up to him a little more, telling him about what their lives had been like in Lothering. Anders smiled as she talked, watching her closely, her every gesture and eye twinkle bringing her closer to his heart as she spoke.

He learned that every time she wanted to say something funny and remain serious at the same time, her eyes nearly always gave her away. He learned that she could smile at him slowly when she was pleased at something he had said. He also felt his heart somersault every time she looked at him with twinkling eyes when she flirted. He had discovered almost from the moment that he met her that she had a good heart. But he was reminded of that and more when he saw how touched she was upon hearing the story of how they had defended the people in the City of Amaranthine against the darkspawn.

"You miss your cat a lot, don't you?" she said softly hours later, when Varric finally had awoken and she stood up to wake Bethany so that they could continue on their journey. "Ser Pounce-a-lot…"

"Yes," Anders replied sadly. "I miss him a great deal, in fact."

"Well…" she said, giving him a lovely smile. "We'll just have to fix that, won't we?"

…


	10. Chapter 10

_**Thank you SO much BlessedArrow, CouslandSpitFire, anesor, Apollo Wings and Morninglight for your awesome feedback! I also want to thank all of you who are now following the story and those who now have it on their list of favorites as well! Cookies for everyone! :D**_

_**A special thanks to my lovely Betas: Eynla and CouslandSpitFire who also have written awesome fics of their own! Be sure to check their fics if you can! (The links are on my list of favorites on my profile!) :D**_

_**Ok, this is one of the chapters that isn't totally AU, because I HAD to include Varric's line about stepping over Bartrand's corpse along the way – I just love it! Also, nothing very different about the whole Deep Roads thing, except for the fact that Velanna makes an appearance. I apologize for the lack of originality! It's just that I really HATE the Deep Roads and wanted to smoothly sail in and out, but discovered to my horror that it took me three chapters to do that! O.o So, sorry about that, too! **_

_**My disclaimer as always: Bioware OWNS! :D **_

Chapter 10

They reached an area that was higher than the rest of the places they had been to so far. Hawke turned to Varric to ask him if he knew where they were and a very loud scraping sound behind them interrupted their chat. Anders's eyes widened as the biggest rocks around them continued to scrape against the stone floor until a huge rock wraith stood in front of them, its skeletal interior glowing and pulsating menacingly. For a moment it just stood there, balancing precariously on what could have been its legs, except for the fact that they were a couple of jagged rocks. Then it laughed – the ominous sound filling the chamber and echoing off the distant walls.

"We're _so_ dead!" Anders muttered as he dipped into the Veil for the strongest ice spell he could focus on. He did not fail to notice Hawke's blurry form as she sped forward to attack it, and felt his heart somewhere in the vicinity of his throat as fear gripped him hard. "Damn it, Hawke, get out of the way!"

Anders's yell was interrupted by Varric's scream as the monster flung an electric bolt at the dwarf that threw him clear across the room. He quickly applied a healing spell on him and Varric stood right up again, firing three deadly bolts directly at the giant. The creature screamed in pain and suddenly disappeared under the ground - reappearing on the group's far left. The rocks had somehow fallen from its skeletal core and Hawke now leaped toward it, hacking in earnest, as Bethany ran forward, a cold misty fog shooting from the tips of her hands which froze it solidly – if only for a few minutes.

Anders finally managed a well-placed ice spell as well, giving Hawke more time for her to continue her attack on it. She slashed at the thing mercilessly as Varric sent out more bolts that tore into the monster. The ice melted and the wraith finally shuddered, as the rocks started to scrape against the floor, slowly adhering to the skeletal interior and forming the protective shell around it once again.

Hawke saw it taking shape and took cover behind one of four massive pillars in the room, practically dragging Bethany with her. She called out to Varric and Anders to do the same. The four of them huddled behind the pillar and at that moment, the great monstrous wraith ended up turning into a huge ball of rock. The thing sent out a blinding ray of red light that enveloped everything in the room, except for the four friends that were behind the stone pillar. One of Anders's arms shot out, planning to cast another ice spell at it, but he screamed in pain and quickly drew it back to his side again. He applied some healing to himself as the rest watched him with concern.

"I can safely say you saved our lives, Hawke," he managed after a few moments. "That red light seems to suck on any life force it can, probably as a regenerative measure."

"I really had no idea of that, you know. It was just pure, dumb luck," Rhianna smiled warmly at him. "But I guess that it's safe to say we can all dart behind one of the pillars for cover if we see it about to change shape."

He could have kissed her right then and there – he certainly wanted to, but the bloody monster had stopped emitting the red light, an indication that it was fully recovered.

"I have a plan, which was the real reason I pulled you all here to begin with," Hawke quickly said as she noticed smaller rock wraiths taking shape around the monster. "While it's like this, just hit it with ranged spells as much as you can. If it seems to be changing shape, which we can tell because it starts shuddering and pulsating like crazy, then run for one of the pillars and take cover behind it! Can you do that?"

"Aye, Captain!" Anders saluted, and then grinned as he stepped out from behind the pillar. Twirling his staff playfully he shouted, his combat cry reverberating against the walls.

"Destructive forces of nature, coming right up!"

…

They were exhausted when the monster and its minions finally fell, but Anders had fared worse and was now kneeling on the floor, his breath coming in short gasps. He had had to deal with offensive as well as healing spells throughout the entire battle. He briefly wondered if he would ever be able to get back on his feet again.

"You look like you could use a drink," Rhianna said with a smile as she handed him a water skin. Anders took it with a smile and drank deeply. Sighing happily, he passed the water skin back to Hawke. Bethany had stayed behind, sitting up against one of the pillars and Varric handed them some ham and cheese, which he had taken from the backpack where they kept the food.

"Your sister isn't eating, Hawke," Varric said, shaking his head.

Rhianna frowned and put back the piece of cheese she had been holding in her hands as she stood up and went to Bethany.

Her eyes were closed and she looked like she was sleeping, so Hawke turned to leave, only to be interrupted by Bethany's melodious voice.

"I'm so glad you finally dealt the killing blow, sister. That thing was taking its toll on all of us."

"Indeed," Hawke said in a low voice, a frown on her face. After a few moments, she cleared her throat, kneeling in front of Bethany. "What's wrong, sister? And don't tell me it's nothing – I just _know_ something is very wrong…"

"You aren't easily fooled, are you?" Bethany commented with a sweet smile, still keeping her eyes closed. "I'm just tired, sister, I promise. I'll just rest here for a while; I can hardly keep my eyes open…"

Rhianna stared at her, trying to find any clue that would tell her what the matter was. After a few moments, she shook her head and smiled at her sister as she got up. "All right. I think all of us need a break. I'll let you know when we're heading out."

"Thank you, sister," Bethany replied, her eyes still firmly shut. But when Hawke left, Bethany opened them. If Rhianna had stayed behind, she would have seen a cloudy film starting to creep over her sister's irises.

Bethany sighed deeply, finally accepting that what she was feeling could only be the product of having fought the darkspawn while she was too close to her sister. Some of the blood must have surely spattered on her, and she must have inadvertently swallowed it. She knew that even the tiniest of a drop could taint any living creature.

It would only be a matter of time now, as she very well knew. Her mind envisioned Aveline's husband, Wesley, begging to be killed rather than turn into a monster. She sighed again, shutting her eyes tightly.

Bethany had been tainted and probably only had a few more days to live.

…

The following morning, they packed to leave and literally stumbled across treasure on their way to a door, which was conveniently locked.

"Treasure? Here?" Anders asked, the surprise in his voice making Rhianna smile.

"Well, Varric said that this was probably the Vault. It makes sense," she replied as she opened the first chest. Hundreds of gold pieces glittered in the half-light of the lit braziers. Lying on top of the gold was a bronze key.

"Aha! A way out of here, maybe?" Varric grinned as he spotted the key. "Shall we fill our backpacks with everything we can carry?"

"Sounds like a plan to me," Hawke chuckled.

As soon as they finished stashing away as much gold and gold objects as they could, Hawke tried the key on the door. Moments later, they heard the familiar 'click' that told them it was unlocked.

"I'm willing to bet this is the way out," Varric grinned.

"You're always betting on things, only to lose horribly afterwards," Anders laughed.

"Only once!" Varric protested. "I can just picture Isabela's face when we get back."

"I hope I'm there," Anders said with a chuckle. "Don't want to miss _that_!"

"What bet are you two talking about?" Hawke asked as she walked, and Varric shook his head.

"Nothing!"

"Ah, if you only knew about the bet," Anders teased. "Why don't you explain it to her, Varric?"

"Bianca's twitching something awful, Blondie," Varric retorted. "Why don't you just drop it before she coughs up a bolt and fires it at you?"

Anders burst out laughing. "Uh, oh! Don't tell me you're actually going to hurt me?"

"Just don't push your luck, Blondie!" Varric said. "I've only just forgiven you for telling me you knew how to play Diamondback!"

"But I _do_ know how to play Diamondback!" Anders exclaimed.

"Very badly!" Varric added with a grin.

"Now there's an idea! Once we're back in Kirkwall, we should make plans to get together at The Hanged Man to play Diamondback!" Hawke exclaimed happily. "I bet I can beat you all easily!"

"And I bet you can't beat me," Anders shot back, wiggling his eyebrows. "I _know_ what you do when you bluff."

"Really? Have you been studying me, then?" Hawke giggled.

"If you're trying to make me blush, it's not working!" Anders replied with a laugh. "I'm not the kind of person who blushes easily!"

"Well, I already did that before, so no!" Hawke announced, turning to face him, her violet eyes shining merrily. "But I can ask you to pull your trousers down again so we can all see you blush!"

Anders broke into a sweat as the images flooded his brain. The bright vermillion on his cheeks made everyone burst out laughing.

_Maker help me!_

"Hahahaha!" Hawke laughed, the tears streaming down her cheeks as she pointed to his red cheeks.

Even Bethany, who had been quietly listening to their playful banter, was laughing.

"Oh, I'm going to get you for this," Anders mumbled, shaking his head. "Just you wait!"

"I can't wait!" Hawke said with a grin. "I'm all-a-tremble!"

"Oh, you'll tremble all right!" Anders teased.

"Well, I can safely say we're on the right track. All the stairs we are running into so far seem to be taking us upward, which is where we need to go," Varric announced with a chuckle as they went up a flight of stairs.

"That's good to know," Hawke replied with a smile. "How long to get back, do you know?"

"If we're unlucky? Five days at the most," Varric replied.

"And if we're lucky?" Hawke asked curiously.

"We'll stumble over Bartrand's corpse along the way," Varric said through clenched teeth.

They all burst out laughing at this as they walked on, a spring in their step and hope in their hearts.

…

They continued on their journey, talking to each other and joking from time to time, stopping only to set up camp, eat, and rest when they were tired. None of them really knew how much time had passed, but Varric actually managed to figure it out and would let them know whenever they asked him. No shades or profane popped out to get them, and they were thankful for that.

They finally reached an area they recognized and stopped to look around. It looked like the vast chamber where they had fought the dragon and dragonlings what felt like a million years ago.

"This looks familiar! Isn't this the place where we fought the dragon and all those dragonlings?" Hawke said excitedly.

"Could we…stop? I – I feel so… ill…" Bethany said behind her in a weak voice.

Fear grasped Hawke's heart and stopped her reply as she turned to get a good look at Bethany. Pieces of her skin were missing and her eyes were covered in a misty white film. Bethany fell to the floor and clutched at her throat as she gasped for breath.

Hawke cried out her name and ran to her, kneeling beside her as she took her in her arms. Anders rushed over, his heart in his throat as the tingling sensation of the Taint suddenly overcame him. He immediately knew what was wrong with Bethany and frowned, a concerned look in his eyes.

_Why didn't I see this sooner? Maker!_

"She's been tainted," He said softly. "I can feel it…"

Hawke cursed under her breath, rocking Bethany gently.

"Why didn't you say anything?" she asked her sister, her eyes bright with unshed tears.

"Well, we were trapped at the time, and you couldn't do anything about it, could you?" Bethany replied with a small smile. "I'll be just as dead as poor Wesley, won't I? It's coming on faster!"

"There _could_ be something we can do," Anders said, remembering where he had gotten the map. "I stole the map from a Warden that was here in Kirkwall. I thought he had come here looking for me, but discovered that the Wardens were actually mounting their own expedition to the Deep Roads."

"And that helps us _how_, exactly?" Rhianna asked, a hint of annoyance in her voice.

"Well, if the Wardens are here, we could take Bethany to them," Anders began.

"And what? Become a Grey Warden?" Bethany finished off for him. Anders nodded.

"Is becoming a Grey Warden a cure?" Hawke asked, looking up at Anders hopefully.

He nodded, but sadly. "I suppose you could say that, yes, but…"

"But what? Spit it out!" Hawke demanded.

"Well, becoming a Grey Warden is _not_ easy. _And_, it may also mean you'll never see your sister again," he replied sadly.

"But what about you? You're not with the Wardens anymore!" Hawke countered.

"You think I got away from them?" Anders shook his head sadly. "I have no illusions about that, Rhianna. I know that maybe someday either they or the Circle will drag me back. Of course, I would probably escape again, but…you really can't get away like you may be thinking," he replied, the sadness in his voice making Hawke want to burst into tears.

"This just keeps getting better and better," Varric grumbled in a sad voice beside Anders.

"I'm to become a Grey Warden, then? Is that the only option for me?" Bethany asked Rhianna.

"I see no better option, Bethany. Do…do you think you can stand?" she asked her gently.

"I can help with that," Anders said. "I know a healing spell that can magically sustain her – keep the Taint at bay, so to speak," his hands glowed golden for a few minutes as they hovered over Bethany. "We'll have to move faster, though. I can sense the Wardens, so locating them won't be much of a problem."

Rhianna nodded and helped Bethany up, as Anders took the lead. They moved quickly down a side passage, and after a short while, Anders stopped as he felt the familiar tingle all over his body, but not as weak as with Bethany before. This could only mean a large group of Wardens or…

"What is it?" Rhianna asked.

"Hmm…" Anders tilted his head slightly. "I think they're nearby…" the tingling was getting even stronger and felt very wrong to him. He instantly knew what was at the end of the corridor and quickly unsheathed his staff from its holster on his back. "Or…it could be darkspawn!"

Anders was right. Just up ahead was a really large group of darkspawn that immediately attacked them – an Emissary commanding them. Hawke disappeared from view as she quickly ran among the fiends to attack the Emissary first. When she reappeared, she was stabbing the thing in its back. Bethany extended her hands, pulling into the Veil for a spell that made the emissary cringe in horror so that Hawke could finish it off. Anders, meanwhile, had sent out a bolt that ricocheted off each of the darkspawn – most of them dying instantly. The rest of them jerked around on their feet, unable to move, giving Hawke another opportunity to kill them easily. He yelled a warning to Hawke, who leapt out of the way to avoid the electric bolts that were still hitting everything in their path. Varric had been firing bolts at the darkspawn and was waiting for Hawke to come back to fire a rain of arrows upon them, but he needn't have bothered.

"Hurry, up sister!" Bethany cried, urging Hawke to come to where they were standing. "I want to use fire to finish them off!"

She waited until Hawke was beside her before dipping into the Veil to shower fire down on the remaining darkspawn. The fiery explosions did the trick, and soon they were all fried to a crisp, their corpses littering the floor. One of them, however, had managed to get away and was sneaking up behind Anders.

Anders turned quickly, flinging one of his deadlier electric bolts at it and as the darkspawn fell, found himself face to face with Stroud and a group of Wardens.

"Hey, Stroud!" he grinned at the surprised Warden as he sheathed his staff. "Did you miss me?"

…


	11. Chapter 11

_**Thanks so much to anesor and Apollo Wings for your awesome reviews! I also want to thank my betas Eynla and CouslandSpitFire for all their help and Blessed Arrow for her help as well! **_

_**This is not a happy chapter – Hawke is a complicated character, as you all will soon see. **_

_**I'll try to upload a new chapter once a week – I'm sorry this hasn't been the case lately, but my health hasn't been cooperating! **_

_**My disclaimer as usual: Bioware owns everything! I just play with the characters. :D **_

Chapter 11

Excerpt from Anders's journal:

_Bethany is now a Grey Warden. I don't know if that's good or bad. When I became one, it was mainly to escape the Circle. Knowing what I know now about the Wardens and about how we eventually end up in that hellhole of the Deep Roads – it makes me feel guilty about taking Bethany to Stroud. _

_Rhianna was thoroughly depressed for a few months and saw no one. Then, she received the news that Bethany was alive and hurried to The Hanged Man to tell us all. She was so happy that she actually jumped up and down while she was talking to us. I couldn't bring myself to tell her how her sister would meet her end, either. I didn't want to cause Rhianna more pain. I – dammit! I don't even know why I'm writing all this! What I do know is that I've not spoken to Rhianna in a while and it's driving me up the wall!_

_I miss her. I need to see her, even if it's only to go on missions with her. She's living in Hightown now. Everyone has been to see her there, except me. She's avoiding me like the plague!_

_This journal is the only thing that is keeping me from drooling and laughing at myself in dark corners while I babble endlessly about the color of the walls and the dirt on the floor. Hmmm…maybe I was right and having a journal __**does**__ do a lot for my mental sanity! _

He shut the journal with a sigh and lay back down on his cot, staring up at the ceiling. He had successfully managed to throw a quill up there during one of his moments of intense boredom, and it had embedded itself in one of the beams. Whenever he focused on the quill, it would keep his thoughts away from Rhianna Hawke and her charms. This was good, because whenever he thought about her, he would end up with a painful erection nine times out of ten, and the only thing he could do then was masturbate. It wasn't that he was against pleasuring himself at all – it was the fact that lately he just ended up feeling more frustrated than before.

He needed the real thing.

Sighing, he turned and closed his eyes as he felt sleep overcome him. Then, there was a loud knocking on his door that made him scramble out of bed quickly, wondering briefly why he wasn't up there with the quill since the pounding had scared him shitless.

He barely managed to jump into his trousers and made his way to one of the doors in a mad rush, flinging it open with an annoyed expression on his face.

"It's about time you opened the door, Blondie!" Varric grinned. "We – ah, need your services at The Hanged Man."

Anders blinked back at him, the pounding in his heart gradually returning to normal. He gestured at Varric to come inside, the relief of knowing that nobody had died washing over him.

"Don't tell me – Fenris got drunk again and started something?" Anders replied as he walked back to the back room to put on his robes – Varric following him.

"Um, no, not really. It's um…Hawke, this time. When I left them to come here looking for you, Fenris _was_ drunk, though. And Rivaini was laughing her head off, so I guess you could say she was drunk too, but I'm not a hundred percent sure of that."

"You were all at The Hanged Man getting drunk and didn't invite me?" Anders remarked, the disapproval in his voice evident. "Do I smell or something?"

Anders looked at himself using the small mirror he had on one of the walls and took out his dagger to give himself a quick shave.

"You're a rotten card player, so we try hard to avoid telling you," Varric chuckled. "Do you have to shave right now? Things were really convoluted when I left."

"I've learned to do this very quickly," Anders replied, drawing some water from one of the barrels to work some soap into lather.

Varric shook his head. "I really think you should come with me right now, Blondie. Before it gets ugly…"

He turned to look at Varric, one of his hands still holding the dipper and dripping water over the floor and himself in the process.

"Things are _that_ bad, huh?" Taking a quick look at himself in the small mirror, he saw that the stubble on his chin wasn't as horrible as he thought and shrugged.

"Well…not _that_ bad…yet…" was Varric's reply.

"All right…just let me throw some potions into my pack and we'll be off."

…

When Varric and Anders walked into The Hanged Man, the cheers and cries coming from the patrons was deafening and the noise they made was so loud that you couldn't even hear the person who played the lute in the evenings. His eyes soon found the reason for their applauses and caterwauling.

Rhianna Hawke was on top of one of the longer tables…and she was _DANCING_.

His eyes quickly spotted Fenris looking up at her adoringly. Isabela stood next to him, a seductive smile on her face as she stared at Hawke. The rest of the people were all crowded around. Rhianna was taking turns dancing and kneeling in front of each man in front of her, wiggling her shoulders and bending over backwards.

Anders heard a noise that sounded like a cross between a sigh, a gasp and a scream and was surprised to discover it was coming from him. He stood rooted to the spot for a few moments and in the meantime, Rhianna had decided it was a fantastic idea to stand up and unbuckle her armor, letting it fall onto the table as she started to strip for her audience.

She had nothing under her leather jerkin but her breast band and smalls. The men went crazy. Anders hurriedly reached into the Veil and cast a spell that quickly put everyone to sleep – including Fenris and Isabela.

"Help me carry her to your suite before the spell wears off, Varric," he muttered as he hurried across the room with the dwarf following closely behind.

...

"How the heck did this happen?" Anders whispered to Varric. They had successfully managed to get her inside Varric's suite and lay her on his bed. Anders then had applied healing magic on her, so that she wouldn't wake up with a hangover.

Isabela walked into the room and winked at Anders, who groaned. He didn't want to chat to anyone – he just wanted to sit quietly beside Hawke and watch her as she slept.

"Is Hawke all right?" Isabela asked with a chuckle.

"You're laughing at this? She was going to take _all_ her clothes off!" Anders exclaimed.

"Why would that be bad?" Isabela laughed.

"Unbelievable!" Anders muttered.

"My! Why so serious all of a sudden?" Isabela remarked in a singsong voice. "We were just having a little fun."

"_Fun_ she says!" Anders looked up at the ceiling with a sigh, the exasperation in his voice not lost on Isabela.

"You used to have fun! Not long ago!" Isabela protested. "You used to _be_ fun! What happened?"

"You really have to ask, Rivaini?" Varric interrupted with a grin. "Can't you see Blondie is _smitten_?"

"What?! No! I – "Anders backed away, shaking his head.

"Oh, that's no fun at all!" Isabela smirked. "Get yourself a drink, Sparkles. That should lighten your mood!"

"I'm _not_ in a bad mood!" Anders continued to protest.

"Well, it isn't a _good_ mood," Isabela retorted.

"Ack!" Anders exclaimed. "I give up! See to it that she drinks a lot of WATER, Varric, can you do that?"

Varric chuckled at him. "Yes, Ser healer mage, the _best_ healer mage of them all…"

Anders sighed. "I see that you probably will forget this tomorrow. I'd better stay here, just in case." He turned to Isabela with a scowl. "If you're going to continue making all that noise, then do it elsewhere. She needs to rest!"

"Oooh! Sparkles is angry!" Isabela snorted. "Well, I'm leaving. I'll see if Jethann is available! Ta-ta!"

"Where am I going to sleep?" Varric asked with a frown.

"Go ahead, get some rest," Anders gestured to the bed. "It's big enough for the both of you. I'll just sit down and wait for her to wake."

Varric chuckled and lay down on the empty side of the bed.

"You just have to admit you have feelings for her, Blondie. The sooner you do, the better you'll feel," Varric commented.

"I didn't ask for your advice," Anders muttered darkly. "I'd sooner kiss an ogre than do _that_."

"Too bad, Blondie," Varric mumbled. He yawned and soon he was fast asleep.

…

"Anders?" Her voice woke him. He had fallen asleep on the chair, as exhaustion had finally overtaken him. "What am I doing in Varric's suite?"

"You, you had a little too much to drink," he yawned, rubbing his eyes.

Varric walked into the room. "Isabela hasn't returned, but that probably means she's still having a good time. Good morning, Chuckles. Glad to see you're doing fine."

"I wish I could have my memory back," Hawke frowned as she rubbed her forehead. "What am I doing in my smalls? And stop gawking at me!" she said to Anders whose eyes had travelled to her breasts that were straining to break free of her breast band.

"The whole tavern was gawking at you last night and you're bothered about _me_ looking now?" Anders smirked. "Now that's just not fair!"

Rhianna pulled a sheet up to cover herself. "What do you mean by 'the whole tavern'?"

"You, um, decided to dance on the table for everyone and took off your leather jerkin. That's when Blondie here intervened," Varric supplied, grinning widely.

"I did what?" Hawke asked, a surprised look on her face.

"You were drunk," Anders smiled. "I arrived just in time to put a sleeping spell on everyone in the tavern, and get you up here."

Hawke burst out laughing. "Protecting my honor, were you?" she asked shaking her head. "That's funny."

Anders blinked back at her a look of confusion on his face. "The men were out of control when you did that. I couldn't let them – "

"What? Rape me?" Rhianna spat out. "You didn't have to, really. There is nothing you can do for me because I'm nothing but a whore. You're wasting your time…"

Anders was stunned to silence. It wasn't the first time she'd done this to him – stun him into silence. He didn't recover fast enough this time, however.

"Hey now, Hawke," Varric said, the sorrow in his voice apparent. "No need to beat yourself up, you know."

"What? You, too?" Rhianna turned to Varric. "You should know better, Varric…in fact, you DO know, don't you? So why don't you two just shut up and leave me alone? I want to get dressed and leave!"

"Come on, Blondie." Varric said quietly. "Let's go so she can dress."

Anders stumbled out of the room, his mind still reeling.

"She's been raped, hasn't she? Don't lie to me about it, Varric. I've healed rape victims before, so I can tell."

"You should probably have this conversation with her, Blondie. I'm not going to talk about it. I don't want to and I can't," Varric said in a low voice.

"I won't talk to her now," Anders replied. "I don't want to end up with a dagger in my back."

The door opened and Rhianna stepped out. She walked coldly past them, the look in her eyes sending chills up and down Anders's back. The lovely spark that was always there was gone.

Her eyes looked dead.

…

Anders spent the rest of the week in his clinic, healing everyone that came to him and thinking about Hawke all the time.

A few days later, she appeared at the door of his clinic.

"I need your assistance. There are some gangs that are robbing and killing people in Hightown. I need to put a stop to it. We're meeting at my house tonight and will set out from there. Can I count on you to join us?" she asked tersely, her eyes darting around the clinic.

"Of course you can," Anders smiled.

"Good. I'll expect you around at sunset, then." She turned to leave, but Anders's hand shot out and grabbed her arm.

"You can always talk to me, you know. I'm here for you." The words tumbled out before he could stop himself.

"I don't need your pity," Rhianna said coldly. "Let go of my arm, please."

"I feel no pity for you," Anders was quick to say. "If you talk about it, you might actually feel better."

Rhianna burst out laughing and he took a step back, confused by her outburst.

"Really, Anders? Talking won't accomplish anything! But if you must know, I'll tell you, since it's clear you _do_ want to know!" she said as she yanked her arm away.

"I _don't_ want to know. But I _do_ know that talking helps," Anders retorted. "You don't have to say another word. But I just want you to know I'm here if you need a friend…"

Rhianna said nothing to this and bowed her head for a few moments. Then she nodded.

"We – we're meeting at sunset. You've never been to the mansion, so maybe it would be better if you go to The Hanged Man instead and ask Varric to show you the way," she finally said.

His eyes followed her as she reached the door. He could feel the pain emanating from her in waves and it was killing him.

She turned to face him before she left, her eyes shining brightly.

"Thank you," she whispered.

Anders watched her disappear into the shadows and sat down, clenching his hands. When had he signed up for all of this? It would be easier for him to leave and start a new life where he didn't have to put up with all this drama.

He sighed and shook his head. He was in too deep. He shut his eyes finally admitting what he didn't want to admit – what he had been trying to ignore for some time now.

He had fallen deeply in love with her and he would die before he left her, Maker help him.

And _that_ was the end of that.

…


	12. Chapter 12

_**Thanks so much to all my wonderful reviewers: Philliwolf5, Eilonwycousland, Apollo Wings, Violet Enigma and anesor. I would also like to thank those of you who have included this fic in their list of favorites and those who are now following it! :D Huge thanks also to my lovely betas Eynla and CouslandSpitFire! :D **_

_**Time for a little bit of smut…not much though! :P So be warned, this chapter is SLIGHTLY NSFW! **_

_**Things are getting a little bit complicated. Let me know what you think! Your feedback is VERY much appreciated! :D **_

Chapter 12

_Kirkwall = Madness_

Anders lay down his quill and sighed as he looked at the two words he had just written. He was so exhausted, he simply could not even pick up the quill again to continue writing. The images of what he had just been through kept popping up in his head and he groaned.

Rhianna Hawke hadn't been kidding about the thugs that were parading Hightown in the evenings. They had been around every single nook and cranny and had successfully eliminated every single bandit they could find.

This, of course, hadn't been enough for Hawke and her bloodthirsty disposition.

Instead of heading home and thanking everyone as she should have done, she had immediately taken the bridge down to Lowtown, looking for any of the gangs that patrolled the empty streets there. Anders silently prayed the bandits had all dropped dead suddenly, so they wouldn't have to continue fighting, but sadly, this had not been the case. To top it all off, the bandits had had mabari dogs fighting with them.

It wasn't that he hated dogs – but a great big mabari hound snapping at your family jewels was exceedingly frightening.

After dealing with those, Hawke had burst out laughing. Isabela was standing next to her and shook her head, rolling her eyes. When Rhianna had announced that it was time to go to the docks to weed out the gangs that operated there, Isabela had protested.

"I'm tired of this!" the Rivaini pirate had pouted. "Why don't we go have some fun?"

Hawke had ignored her comment completely, nonchalantly wiping some blood off her right cheek with her hand. Then, she had made her way to the stairs that led to the docks, without even looking back to see if the rest followed.

The gangs at the docks had been the worst of the bunch. Fortunately, they had managed to kill them all in the end. Anders was not surprised at all to see the sun peeping out over the horizon when they were done. They had been fighting non-stop all night long. Even though Rhianna had suggested heading over to The Hanged Man for drinks, everyone had been quick to mumble some kind of excuse. Rhianna had then waved her goodbyes to all of them heartily, and disappeared, happily skipping up the stairs leading to Hightown and her estate.

_I had to go and fall for a woman who not only has a death wish, but thrives on bandits for dinner and breakfast!_

He rose from his chair and stretched, then headed directly for his tiny room. Flinging himself on the cot face down, he fell into a blissful, dreamless sleep.

When he woke up, he noticed that the day had turned to night and groaned, sitting up quickly. After a few moments, he decided to make his way over to The Hanged Man to take a relaxing bath and go back to sleep. At least that was the idea he had while he was shaving. As soon as he was done, he smiled at his reflection in the mirror and patiently combed and tied his hair back, then turned and entered the main room of the clinic.

He froze when his eyes fell on the object of his affection, who was standing in the middle of the room holding his journal.

"See? I read it. It was only a matter of time…" Rhianna smiled triumphantly at him.

…

The woman crawled a bit further ahead, pausing only to gather her strength. Her breathing was coming in short gasps and she was covered in blood. She had seen an opening in the distance and was determined to reach it.

_Mages. Demons. Shades. _

The woman groaned and grunted with each movement she made, until she finally reached the opening, the bright light blinding her momentarily.

_Mages. Demons. Shades. You must prevail!_

She took in a breath of fresh air, mixed in with the aroma of flowers and green grass. That breath gave her the strength to open and shut her eyes repeatedly, until the glare of the light stopped hurting.

_Mages. Demons. Shades. Prevail! Prevail!_

A streak of lightning crashed down from the sky, and thunder rumbled nearby as dark clouds rolled in. A storm would be upon her soon. Instinctively, she knew she had to make it to some kind of shelter, away from the rain. In her weakened state, a storm would prove to be another hardship for her – one that she might not overcome easily.

She opened her eyes. One of them was so swollen and bruised, it refused to open all the way. The rain was falling over her fast, and was washing away some of the grime and blood, but she was still bleeding from her multiple wounds.

_Mages. Demons. Shades. Prevail! LIVE!_

There was an elderly woman bending over her. A woman with kind green eyes and white hair, golden tattoos on her face that glistened as the raindrops fell over her. The woman frowned and then was gone.

_Mages. Demons. Shades. Prevail! Live! Live to fight another day!_

She struggled to stay conscious, but blood was still flowing from her wounds, her life force ebbing away. The dark clouds had now turned the day to night, and the storm was coming down on her relentlessly and cruelly.

"Don't be afraid, Da'len. You are safe now," the old woman said. She had returned to her with two more people, who lifted her up. The last thing she heard before the darkness enveloped her completely was the old woman's voice again.

"Everything will be all right…"

…

"What in blazes are you doing here?" Anders demanded crossly as he yanked the journal from her hands. "And does the word 'private' mean _anything_ at all to you?"

"Aww!" Rhianna chuckled. "Wittle Anders is angwy. Wittle Anders finks he can –"

She never finished her sentence. Anders's lips descended on hers angrily, one of his hands yanking her head back by pulling on her dark tresses – his journal, now forgotten, falling to the floor with a thud. Rhianna gasped into his mouth as he hungrily devoured her lips. His head was swimming, his erection painfully straining against his smalls. The sweetness of her lips intoxicated him. He waited for her brusque reaction, but it never came.

Instead, she kissed him back with fervor, her passion only fueling his own. A whirlwind of emotions invaded his brain and the blood roared through his veins, setting his body on fire. One of his hands caressed the nape of her neck and the other travelled slowly down her back. Her hands laced themselves in his hair and the tie holding it back flew off, landing somewhere on the floor. His blond hair cascaded over her hands, falling against his cheeks and she moaned into his lips, causing him to hold her against him tighter.

One of her hands had made its way to the front of his trousers and brushed against his erection, and he ground himself against her as he trailed kisses down her cheek to the delicious curve of her neck. He steered her expertly against one of the walls and his hands now fumbled at the straps that held her leather jerkin in place as he kissed her lips again, while she worked at the lacings on his trousers.

Anders then lifted his head, fixing his eyes on her face and found her smirking at him – a look that he wasn't expecting to see. And when she caught him looking at her, she threw back her head and laughed.

He released her instantly.

"Why are you stopping?" she asked calmly, still smiling up at him. "We were getting to the 'good' part."

"I know what you're doing here, Rhianna," he replied softly. "I'm not going to bed you, only to have you run to another as if nothing happened."

Her smile vanished. "I thought you liked having fun."

"I did and I do," he replied, spotting his tie on the floor and walking over to retrieve it. He turned back to look at her sadly. "But you are not the kind of person I would have 'fun' with…"

She was frowning now and her violet eyes flashed angrily at him. "It's just sex!"

"No. If it's you and me, I don't want it to be 'just sex'," Anders shot back, feeling his stomach plummet to the ground. "I'm sorry."

She looked down and for a few moments did not speak. "Then, I'll go and not bother you again," she finally said as she adjusted her leather jerkin, fastening her straps securely.

"You think something will happen to me if you have feelings for me, am I right?" he asked, hoping for an answer – any answer.

She turned and opened the door, ignoring his question completely and disappeared into the gathering darkness outside the clinic.

Anders stood there for a few moments, staring into the darkness beyond the door. His heart was still hammering in his chest, but his breathing was back to normal. Breaking free of his desperation and sadness, he turned and went back into his tiny room where he collected his coin purse. He left the clinic and walked straight to The Blooming Rose where he got himself a girl.

Then, when his passion was spent, he headed to The Hanged Man where he applied the salve to a nice hot bath. While he lay in the hot water, he forced himself to think about nothing at all, but the image of Rhianna haunted him mercilessly. He gave up trying to relax and washed himself hurriedly, anxious to get back to his clinic and sleep. He smiled at Corff on the way out and walked slowly back to Darktown. Upon arrival, he automatically undressed and lay on his cot, hoping to fall asleep.

But sleep never came to him that night.

…

He didn't see Rhianna at all for two weeks, but he was the one who avoided her this time around, staying away from her favorite spots, including The Hanged Man. He even changed his daily bath routine to early in the mornings when he knew Varric and Isabela would still be sleeping to avoid running into them or Rhianna.

He continued to heal his patients whenever necessary, but there wasn't much to do these days, except walk around gathering ingredients and listening to the refugees' small talk during the day. He also managed to find some chamomile and valerian root, which made him smile, as he knew it would solve the problem of his sleepless nights.

He went to Lirene's store and discovered that she had recently acquired some spell tomes and books and his eyes widened when she handed them to him.

"How much?" he asked her, his lopsided grin making her smile back at him.

"Oh, nothing. I don't need them, I'm no mage," Lirene replied.

"But they must have cost you something. Let me repay you with something at least!" Anders protested.

"You can continue to heal our countrymen as you do," the woman responded with a nod. "That will do."

"Thank you, Lirene. As soon as I have some coin, I'll pay you for these," Anders said, his eyes shining with gratitude.

"Then drop the money in the collection box, don't pay me," the good woman said.

"You have yourself a deal, my lady," Anders replied with a bow. Lirene giggled and shooed him off, as she turned to a pair of refugees that had only just arrived.

Anders carried his books to his clinic, a happy spring to his step. He was the kind of person that enjoyed reading a lot and he looked forward to a quiet evening with a nice cup of hot tea and some ham, cheese and bread for supper.

There were a few refugees in his clinic when he arrived and he quickly attended to them, eager to get to the books and his supper. Then, when the last person had left, he went out to extinguish the lanterns outside his clinic and lock the doors for the night.

"Hey, Blondie!" Varric called out cheerfully from the shadows as he approached the door.

"Hey, Varric," Anders grinned. "What brings you here?"

"Before you start hovering over me like a worried mother or something, I'm not sick or wounded," the dwarf replied with a smile. "I haven't seen you around and I know you come to The Hanged Man for your bath every night. Have you been avoiding me?"

Anders chuckled. "No. I – um – have been doing a lot of healing lately, so I get there late, and your door is always closed."

"You're a terrible liar, Blondie," the dwarf smirked as he sat down on a chair that Anders had dragged over for him.

"Not really, no," Anders grinned, sitting down himself on another chair directly opposite Varric. "But it seems I can't lie to you."

"It's Bianca. She tells me when a person is lying and never gets it wrong," Varric said smugly. "So, what's up?"

"I – I'm trying to avoid an awkward situation," he started to explain lamely, avoiding Varric's eyes. "But I can't really tell you the details because I honestly don't know what to do about it at the moment or what the outcome will be."

"We missed you the other day," Varric said thoughtfully. "Broody was helping Hawke with a job and we got ambushed by Tevinter slavers who wanted to take Fenris away."

"Really?" Anders leaned over with interest. "I'm not going to ask if you managed to get through the whole thing because you're sitting right here."

"No shit, Blondie," Varric grinned. "There we were…staring at death in the face! There were crazy mercenaries, shades, demons and a blood mage involved. No sign of his former master though. The elf went ballistic. I personally thought he was glowing more than he ever had glowed before. But it was worse when it was all over with!"

"What do you mean it was worse?" Anders asked.

"Well, Hawke tried to comfort the elf, and he turned around and yelled at her. He actually snarled! Then, he ended up saying something about how magic had ruined his life – I can't remember the exact words right now. Thing is, he ran off, leaving us behind. But Hawke grinned herself silly and thought it was 'hot'!" Varric shook his head. "That girl has some serious mental problems!"

Anders stood up quickly, walking towards a table where he kept his potions and food. "I was just about to have some dinner when you arrived. Care to join me?" he asked, keeping his back to Varric as he magically heated some water in a cup.

"Oh, no, I ate already. Truth be told, I only wanted to tell you we'll be heading out to Sundermount tomorrow and thought you should join us," Varric said standing up and moving towards the door. "Hawke asked me to let you know, as a matter of fact."

"I'll see if I can," Anders turned back to face him with a smile on his face.

Varric had already realized what was going on, and the smile Anders had on his face had just confirmed it for him. He didn't press Anders to tell him, though, but waved a goodbye at him with a grin on his face.

"It'll be good to have you with us again, Blondie. We leave at daybreak," the dwarf said as he left the clinic.

Anders sat back down with a frown, sipping his herbal tea thoughtfully, the butterflies in his stomach making it nearly impossible for him to eat. Nearly impossible. He devoured his food anyway, knowing that the Taint would never allow him to skip a meal for as long as he lived.

The tea he had brewed had the special herbs in it to soothe his nerves and he had no trouble falling asleep that night. Rhianna Hawke once again haunted his dreams, however. He made love to her and told her that he loved her. She told him that she loved him over and over, filling his heart with joy.

When he woke up the following morning, he had been so happy for the first few seconds…

…until he realized it had all been a dream.

…


	13. Chapter 13

_**Thank you so much karebear, Apollo Wings and anesor for your awesome reviews! I really appreciate your feedback! Thanks so much to my two lovely betas as well: CouslandSpitFire and Eynla. You two are positively awesome! **_

_**NSFW Warning: The first section of this chapter in italics describes a rape scene. If you think you can't handle it, or you feel it will be offensive to you, just skip and continue below the break. You have been warned! I decided to let you all take a look into Rhianna's thoughts and feelings in this chapter, so that you get a better picture of what she is made of, so to speak. **_

_**This chapter isn't a very happy or funny chapter. Sorry about that! I'll strive to write funnier stuff in the next one! **_

_**My disclaimer as usual: Bioware owns everything – I just play with the characters! :D **_

Chapter 13

_The two girls thought they were alone in the barn as they worked, carrying the hay and setting it on the floor into piles. A noise startled them and when they turned, they saw a templar standing behind them. _

_The templar sneered, looking directly at the more voluptuous girl of the two who was standing in front of him. The other girl he ignored completely – she was far too thin and scrawny. _

"_I'm so going to enjoy this," he said, his speech slurred. "I want you to undress. Take your clothes off and come to me…" _

_The lyrium binge he had been on had taken the euphoria he now felt to limits he thought weren't possible. The taste of the thing in his mouth made his speech slurred, but still comprehensible. Lyrium was the reason he had known there were two girls in the building – he had picked up the 'singing magic', as he liked to call it, coming from the thinner girl of the two and had stumbled forward into the area where they had been working. _

_The older girl's eyes widened and the templar smiled when he saw the fear in them. He felt even more powerful than he had ever felt before. The younger girl started to cry. _

"_Shut up! SHUT UP!" the templar shouted, and the older girl turned to her, begging her to be quiet. The younger girl pursed her lips and held her hand over her mouth to stifle the cries as she continued to sob, her chest heaving with every breath she took. _

"_If I do this, will you leave my sister alone?" the older girl asked, her eyes staring directly into the templar's._

"_I will leave her alone, and I won't inform anyone that she is a mage, I promise you," the templar licked his lips in anticipation, already untying the buckles that held his codpiece in place. _

"_Look away, Bethany," the older girl said as she took off her clothes. "Please shut your eyes and promise me you won't look…"_

"_Oh, sister!" the eleven-year-old girl sobbed. _

"_Promise me!" _

"_I promise," her sister replied in a soft voice as her sister turned away. _

_Rhianna Hawke shut her eyes as the Templar forced her on her knees first, putting his cock into her mouth. She nearly gagged and the Templar growled, forcing her to open up wide. He thrust inside her deeply, and then suddenly withdrew, forcing Rhianna on her back on top of a pile of sweet-smelling hay. His lips descended on her roughly as he flung his gauntlets to the side. One of his hands roughly massaged a breast, the other one forced her legs apart as he positioned himself above her. _

_When he entered her, he did so in one movement, breaking through her maidenhood roughly and eliciting a scream of pain from Rhianna. He thrust in and out, uncaring…faster and faster until he withdrew at the last minute and spilled his seed all over her stomach. _

_Rhianna kept her eyes tightly shut, the pain keeping her from uttering a single word. When it was over, the templar stood up and put on his gauntlets, then adjusted the rest of his armor, a look of smug satisfaction on his face. He looked down at the girl uninterestedly, but when he saw she was bleeding, he threw a piece of cloth at her. _

"_Clean yourself up," he muttered. "And I expect you here tomorrow night if you want your sister to live!"_

"_Live?" the girl whimpered._

"_I'll tell the rest of the templars that your sister is a blood mage and have her executed. I know what your father is! I'll have him arrested and executed, too!" the templar snarled back. "So you be good, and be here or your sister and father will pay!"_

_Fifteen-year-old Rhianna Hawke could only nod as she gently cleaned the blood away. The templar left and she sat up carefully. Bethany ran up to her and knelt at her side, crying even more when she saw her bruises. _

"_Sister! We have to tell father!" _

"_No! You heard what he said!" Rhianna protested. "You must promise me, Bethany! Promise you won't ever tell!"_

"_I promise, sister," Bethany sobbed. "I promise!"_

_She helped Rhianna put her clothes back on and then hugged her. Rhianna hugged her sister back, vowing to protect her from the templars for as long as she lived. _

…

Rhianna Hawke woke up breathing heavily, covered in a light sheen of sweat. It had been some time since she'd had that nightmare. She dreaded sleeping because of it, which is why she pushed herself way past her limits so that she could return to the house and fall asleep instantly. But now, the past had suddenly come back to haunt her and she shook her head, forcing herself to think of her friends instead.

The image of Anders's face instantly came to her and she sighed. If only she could love him freely as he deserved! She would love him as nobody had ever loved him. She would comfort him and strive to make him happy – as he deserved to be. The sadness in her heart nearly choked her. She could not let him love her! She would fight to get him to hate her if it was the last thing she did!

Dear, sweet Anders…

The memory of the fateful night when she had been raped once again invaded her brain, vividly, because of her nightmare. Try as she might, she could not push it away. She frowned in the darkness as she sat on the huge bed where she slept, ransacking her brain for something to take her mind off that painful moment.

The painful moment that had taught her that she was just a thing to be had – an object that men would abuse and then throw away as they saw fit when they got tired. She remembered the nights that followed the incident – remembered how she had been forced to have sex not only with that templar but with his friends as well. She remembered all that she had been through to protect her sister and her father. Shuddering and shaking with disgust, she pulled the blankets up to her chin as she sat there, unable to make the images go away.

She hadn't gotten pregnant – the templars had always avoided spilling their seed inside her for some reason. She had, however, collected some herbs that would prevent any unwanted pregnancy. She boiled the herbs and drank the infusion every morning.

After a month of shame, pain and silent pleas to the Maker, the templar that had raped her was sent somewhere else and his friends were relocated as well, but the damage was already done.

Rhianna Hawke had been scarred for life.

…

Tempers were frayed when they set off for Sundermount that morning. Fenris stood at Rhianna's side and glared at Anders repeatedly. Isabela informed Anders in a whisper that Fenris and Rhianna were in some kind of 'relationship', so Anders glared back at Fenris jealously. Varric rolled his eyes and grinned, itching to get back to his suite to sit down and write about it all.

"It's hot today," Rhianna suddenly complained, her voice an octave higher than normal. "I wish it would rain again."

Fenris kept his eyes on her, silently gazing at her every move and gesture. Anders found himself clenching his fists and turned to look at the scenery. Beside him, Isabela snickered.

They reached the Dalish camp and Rhianna turned to them.

"We're here because I want to check in on Feynriel, and I also want to go up the mountain to see if there is anything lurking around that needs to be killed," she informed them. She then gave them all a brilliant smile and walked into the camp.

The Keeper was standing next to one of the aravels, but Feynriel was nowhere to be seen. Rhianna made a beeline for the Keeper, presumably to ask about Feynriel.

Anders spotted a familiar-looking woman dressed in frayed mustard-colored robes who was standing next to the Keeper. He frowned slightly as they approached and stopped dead in his tracks when he recognized the woman.

His hand shot out, grabbing Rhianna by the wrist and pulling her back, and she gave a surprised cry as she turned to face him.

"What the blazes are you doing?" she whispered angrily, her violet eyes flashing at him.

"Velanna is here! She's standing next to the Keeper!" Anders exclaimed.

"So?" Rhianna replied, her nostrils flaring slightly. Anders was about to let go of her, but noticed Fenris seething jealously as he came to stand right next to Rhianna. Anders pulled Rhianna closer with a smile.

"I'm sorry. Don't you remember her from the Deep Roads?" he asked.

"I do. And if she's standing next to the Keeper, she can't be _that_ bad, can she?" Rhianna shot back at him.

"Just be careful," he replied. "Justice was a spirit, but we don't know what the merge could have done to him. I was never comfortable when I spoke to him. He was too righteous, too close-minded. Velanna is crazy. I have a feeling that she won't be any saner now."

"Well," Rhianna said with a smile. "I guess we'll have to find out, won't we?"

She squeezed his hand and he smiled down at her. "You're right, of course. But I don't trust either of them, so I'll have a spell at the ready."

Rhianna burst out laughing, her eyes twinkling. "It's so good to know I have a nice, handsome mage who'll protect me!" she exclaimed, and Fenris bristled visibly as she spoke. Then she turned to continue walking.

Anders winked at Fenris, who glared at him angrily. Varric chuckled behind Anders and Isabela rolled her eyes.

"I wish I had at least brought some parchment and a quill," Varric said to Anders as they followed Hawke. "I'll never make _that_ mistake again!"

…

To Anders's surprise, Velanna was mellow. He had never seen her mellow before and cast a suspicious glance at the Keeper. It seemed to him that it had a lot to do with a potion to calm her than anything else. She certainly was not herself, and was looking down at the grass the whole time that Hawke talked to Marethari.

He kept a cautious gaze on Velanna the whole time, ignoring most of the conversation. But when he heard the Keeper mention her, he quickly turned and paid attention.

"She was half dead; crawling out of the entrance to what we thought was a cave. It turned out to be an entrance to the Deep Roads. She had encountered and fought the darkspawn. From what I could understand, her sister had turned into something terrible – she repeated the word 'broodmother' several times," Marethari said sadly.

Even though Anders was terrified of Velanna and thought she was crazy, he felt sorry for her. He certainly felt that she didn't deserve to see her sister become a broodmother at any rate. Nobody deserved that.

"A broodmother sounds terrible," Anders said softly. "I'm sorry, Velanna."

She gave no indication that she had heard him and Marethari cut in.

"I've given her a potion to calm her nerves – her grief was making it impossible for me to heal her. Several demons attacked her when she struggled to get out of the cave… before she collapsed at the entrance and we found her. I don't know how she could have survived all this. It's a miracle she is alive."

"I'm sorry," Anders said again, glancing at Hawke who was watching Velanna closely with the saddest expression he had ever seen on her face.

"Is she still hurt or did you manage to heal her completely?" Rhianna asked with a concerned look on her face.

"I have done my best," Marethari replied, glancing at Anders meaningfully.

"I'll gladly take a look," Anders smiled, then glanced back at Hawke who was smiling softly at him – the look in her eyes surprising him. Her smile vanished when she noticed that he was looking at her, but it didn't matter because that look she had given him had said it all.

It was a look of affection – true affection. He didn't dare hope it was love, but it was close enough for him and hope fluttered in his heart.

So healing Velanna was something he did quite happily.

When he was done, she stole another glace at him only to look away quickly, but the whole thing made his heart flutter and put a lopsided grin on his face. He was a grown man, but he felt like a giddy teenager who had fallen in love for the first time. Then, he realized that it _was_ the first time and chuckled under his breath.

"Thank you so much," Marethari grinned. "I'll take her into the aravel so that she can rest."

"We'll look around to see if there is anything up the mountain that we can kill for you," Rhianna said cheerfully and Marethari smiled, amused by her words.

Anders was still floating in the clouds and followed Hawke up the mountain with a smile until Varric jabbed him with his elbow.

"Wake up, Blondie!" Varric exclaimed. "Shades right in front of us!"

…

The trip back was uneventful, considering that all of them were exhausted from fighting a dragon at the top of the mountain. Anders's robes were slightly singed and he sighed as he considered getting himself new robes to replace these. He hated spending the money he had just earned, especially since he needed to restock the clinic, but there was no way he would continue to wear these things as they were close to disintegrating completely soon from all the wear and tear he had put them through.

"I just remembered I have something for all of you," Rhianna cut through his thoughts and he smiled as he glanced at her. "I found some chests full of stuff in the unused wing of the estate. Apparently, the Amells liked to store swords and armors in chests for future use. Some of them were in bad shape, so I threw them out, but there's one chest in particular that has things that look brand new. Why don't you all come to the mansion with me and poke around? You can take whatever you want!"

She grinned at them, but her eyes lingered on Anders the longest.

"I'm quite content with the sword you gave me yesterday," Fenris said with a smile. Rhianna smiled back rather seductively at him and Anders looked jealously at the elf. Isabela snickered, and shook her head.

"I have a date at the Blooming Rose," she purred. "Otherwise I'd be delighted, Hawke." Isabela waved goodbye and disappeared.

"Point the way, Hawke," Varric grinned. Anders knew exactly what he was thinking, though. It wasn't that Varric wanted anything in the chest. It was only for the chance to see what happened between Hawke, Fenris and himself.

"Anything for your story, huh?" Anders muttered at Varric.

Varric burst out laughing. "I'm hurt, Blondie! I enjoy the company of my friends!"

"Yeah, riiiight," Anders said, shaking his head. Then he followed Rhianna and Fenris into the Amell Estate.

…

It turned out that Rhianna had a small treasure cove of armor and weapons, handed down from her relatives and there even was a chest that had some of her father's things that they had managed to bring with themselves from Lothering.

Anders found a staff that he promptly fell in love with, which had belonged to her mother's uncle twice removed - or something like that. A note that accompanied the staff explained that the man – obviously a mage – had constructed the staff from scratch and called it 'Illumination'. When Anders took it in his hands, it 'sang' to him – the magic pulsating and filling him entirely. He also noticed that it had three rune slots, which was an extra plus. Grinning he turned to Rhianna, who was watching him closely with a smile on her face.

"Can I?" he asked her, his eyes shining hopefully.

"Of course! Take anything you want!" Rhianna replied with a laugh. She turned to Fenris who had found a huge greatsword and was brandishing it – then bringing it down again in a sweeping arc. The pleased look on Fenris's face made Rhianna laugh again and she quickly told him to keep it.

Anders then found three sets of robes and actually burst out laughing.

"I needed new robes! What luck!"

"Well, there you go!" Rhianna beamed. "Take them! And look, feathered pauldrons on two of them!"

"But if these belonged to your father, wouldn't you like to keep them?" Anders asked gently, with a soft expression on his face.

Rhianna shook her head. "You deserve them. Besides, there is nobody I can think of that is so like my father than you…You'll do them justice," she added softly.

Varric, who was standing in the shadows watching their every reaction and gesture with a smile, groaned inwardly when he saw what was happening between Rhianna and Anders.

"I'll have to bring a spare quill and some parchment with me whenever we travel," he muttered to himself as he shook his head. "Otherwise I'll end up shooting myself for being so stupid!"

…


	14. Chapter 14

_**So, this chapter is lighter in tone, hoping that it takes the bad taste that the previous one left for some. It's also lighter because what comes next is not very happy at all, but you all will probably have guessed what comes next by the time you finish reading the chapter, so I won't say anything else. **_

_**Thanks so much anesor and Apollo Wings for your reviews! I also want to thank my lovely beta Eynla for her suggestions and help! **_

_**My disclaimer as always: Bioware owns everything! I only play with the characters. **_

Chapter 14

_Raiders! Raiders on the cliffs! And she goes ahead and tries to kill them all, ignoring the fact that they surround her! So, I have to put myself between danger and her and end up bleeding profusely! AND I need another pair of boots now! _

Anders set his quill down with a shaking hand. This time, the enemy had made it a point to try to kill Hawke before attacking the rest of the group and he had felt extremely afraid. That wasn't so different from his normal reaction, except for the fact that he hadn't been afraid for himself but for Rhianna. It surprised him because that fear for another person hadn't exactly been one that he had experienced before.

Was _this_ what it was like? Love? The fear of losing your loved one? The recklessness that he had felt while protecting her fiercely in the face of danger not caring if he died in her stead? A desire to protect her at all costs?

He sighed and rubbed his eyes as he pondered on how he had felt today – particularly because he thought his heart had stopped beating when one of the assassins working for that stupid blood mage Fell Orden had backstabbed her, and she had slumped unconscious to the ground. Fenris had let out a bloodcurdling scream in what sounded to him like the Tevinter language, followed by "I will not allow it!" and had hacked the attacker into pieces while Anders's own scream had drowned out the rest. He had then rushed forward and fallen on his knees to tend to her while Varric, Aveline, Isabela and Fenris had finished the rest of the raiders off. "Don't be dead, please!" he had whispered as he searched for a pulse frantically. He found it, and remembered sighing with relief as he brought her back from the brink of death.

Her sweet violet eyes looking up at him and her smile…Anders grabbed the quill again and continued to write, the memory of her filling him completely and causing him to tremble slightly.

_I can't take this anymore! I'm not here to be a hero or a love-struck knight in shining armor! I don't bloody well own a white horse and can't wield a sword, let alone carry a shield! _

Anders wrote the words angrily, underlining the last five.

_I'm a mage! Not a bloody warrior! Besides, she already has a warrior! Fenris! _

Upon writing the elf's name, he threw the quill onto the floor, the jealousy he was feeling making him stand up and pace the main room of the clinic angrily. The walls of the clinic felt like they were closing in on him and he grabbed his staff – the one that Hawke had given him not two days ago – and walked out of the clinic into the shadows.

He walked up to Lowtown breathing in the night air and feeling a lot better. He considered stopping by The Hanged Man for a drink for a moment, but then decided against it, realizing that he would probably run into Hawke if he went inside. He didn't want to see her so he turned, bumping into Merrill who was just arriving.

"Oh, sorry! I didn't see you, Anders," Merrill apologized hurriedly.

"Hello, Merrill!" Anders managed a smile. His eyes widened slightly when he saw who Merrill was with and he took a step back.

Velanna sneered at him and cocked an eyebrow. "You weren't expecting to see me, were you?"

Anders turned to look at Merrill who was smiling.

"You two know each other, right? From Amaranthine?"

"Uh…" Anders managed to say, his eyes now glancing back at Velanna.

"I see you still gape at others and lack proper conversational skills. Some things never change, do they?" Velanna gave a derisive laugh, which sounded like a bark to Anders.

"What are you doing here?" Anders asked, his speech returning suddenly.

"Why should I answer that question, human?" Velanna shot back at him, her eyes flashing angrily.

"Oh, it's only Anders! If you'll be working with Hawke, you're going to have to get used to seeing him!" Merrill said with a smile, oblivious to the hostility that emanated from Velanna in waves. "He's our healer!"

"I know he's a healer!" Velanna exclaimed with a sneer.

Merrill burst out laughing. "Oh, I forgot you would know! You've worked with him before, right?"

Anders couldn't believe his eyes or ears. Merrill kept on talking nonsense, and ended up inviting him into The Hanged Man. He shook his head vigorously, taking another step back.

"I – ah…have other things to do!" He turned slightly, glancing in Velanna's direction once again, who was eyeing him scornfully at the moment. "Bye, Merrill!"

He walked away rather quickly, his head down, expecting to be fried by one of Velanna's fireballs, but when he looked back, the street was empty. They had stepped inside the tavern and he was alone again.

Velanna? Working with Hawke? He felt dizzy all of a sudden and cursed under his breath. How could he let that happen? Velanna was dangerous to be around. And now that she had merged with Justice, there was no telling what would happen. She was a walking bomb that was ticking, ready to go off at the slightest provocation.

He shook his head and sighed heavily. Without knowing how or why, he found himself standing in front of the door that led into The Hanged Man. And without thinking, he turned the latch and walked inside.

He spotted Hawke instantly at a table that was near the door, sitting with Fenris – of course – and Isabela and Varric. Both Isabela and Fenris were staring curiously at Velanna. Merrill sat next to Fenris and Velanna sat next to Merrill.

Anders blinked at the scene before him, wondering where his common sense had gone to. Under the tables, perhaps? He was debating whether or not to sprint out of the place or walk out, when Hawke raised her eyes and saw him.

The look she gave him turned his knees to jelly and all thought of escape suddenly vanished without a trace. His lopsided grin and the elation he felt made him walk right up to her, and he gazed down at her longingly.

"Well, hello, Anders!" she said cheerfully, her violet eyes twinkling up a storm. "Why don't you sit right here beside me? We're planning our next mission and I'd love to have you along!"

There was an empty chair on her left and Anders took it, giving Fenris – who was sitting on her right – a playful wink. Fenris glared angrily at him and turned back to inspect Velanna. Anders suddenly brightened considerably as it dawned on him that Fenris would not appreciate having yet another mage in the group. In fact, Fenris would be extremely on edge if the mage in question had a spirit inside her.

"Fenris," Anders called out happily and the elf turned back to him with a scowl. "Velanna is a Grey Warden like me, you know!"

"I wouldn't have guessed," Fenris said in a monotone, narrowing his eyes at him.

"Oh, there is more to her than meets the eye, wouldn't you say, Hawke?" Anders said with a chuckle.

"Stop talking about me as if I wasn't here!" Velanna spat out, glaring at Anders and then at Fenris, who was now eyeing her suspiciously.

"Yes, ah, I might have neglected to tell you – "Rhianna began with a frown, capturing Fenris's attention once again, but at that moment, Velanna rose from the table angrily.

"I came with Merrill because she told me there was a job. I need money to live. I'm an experienced mage, and handy with fire. I also heal. If you have any need for me, I'm staying with Merrill for the moment. I don't have to sit here and listen to your senseless gibberish. I've had enough of it!" Velanna snarled. Without waiting for an answer from Hawke, she stalked out of the tavern and left the rest sitting at the table gaping after her.

"What is it that you neglected to tell me, Hawke, besides the obvious self-righteousness and arrogance that oozes out of her?" Fenris asked Rhianna who was still frowning.

Anders sat happily back in his chair, enjoying himself immensely. Once Hawke told Fenris about Justice and Velanna, this would effectively draw the attention _away_ from him. It wasn't that he didn't love attention, but coming from Fenris it was downright dangerous. Besides, if they were _very_ lucky, Fenris might lose his temper altogether and kill Velanna. As far as he could see, it was a win, win situation.

Anders smile turned into a grin when he heard Fenris yell "_What_?!" It was nice to know he still hadn't lost his touch…

…

Hawke entered the clinic while he was healing, so she had to stand in the shadows watching him while he smiled at his patient and stole glances at her. He could see she was angry and braced himself for the inevitable. As soon as his patients and some refugees left the clinic, Rhianna planted herself firmly in front of him, her hands on her hips and her eyes flashing angrily.

"Why did you have to go and do that for?" she demanded.

"Do what?" he answered, wiggling his eyebrows at her.

A half-growl escaped her lips and he smiled at her smugly. "Don't you dare insult me with the idea that I don't know what you've just done with Fenris!"

Anders chuckled. "I assure you I've done _nothing_ with Fenris. Although, he _does_ look like he's a sexy beast and must be very good in bed…"

A cry of impatience burst forth from Rhianna's red lips and his eyes glanced at them hopefully. What he wouldn't give to kiss those red lips of hers right at this very minute…

"You know what I mean! Now he's going to glare at Velanna, and she isn't the kind of person who can control her anger!"

"Noticed that, have you?" Anders grinned.

"You're impossible!" she cried, stomping her foot to emphasize her words. "Don't you know that the battles we fight are dangerous enough without having Fenris wanting to kill someone in our group?"

"I think she's dangerous. To herself and to our group," Anders replied calmly. "Fenris would probably do us all a favor if you ask me."

"Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you, but he _won't_ go and kill her. I've made him promise not to!" Rhianna replied shrilly.

"And I'm sure he'll keep his promise," Anders commented, his smirk infuriating her even more.

"I know why you did this," she said, her breathing suddenly slowing down. "You resent Fenris keeping an eye on you, don't you?"

"It makes no difference what I feel," he shrugged sadly. "It seems you and Fenris are an item, and there is little I can do about that. Did you tell him it was a one-night-thing for you and not a happily-forever-after?"

Her eyes widened at the sudden change of subject and she took a step back, not knowing how to respond to that at first. She quickly recovered, however.

"What I do is none of your business!"

"Obviously," he agreed with a gentle shake of his head.

"What do you want from me?" she huffed.

"I want to love you," he responded easily, watching her take yet another step back. "But you won't let me. You don't want to love and you don't want anyone to love you." He paused, closing the distance between them until he was standing right in front of her. "Does Fenris know this, I wonder?"

Her eyes were fixed on his, large and beautiful, a deep, royal purple in the half-light of the room. Without a second thought, he took her face between his hands and kissed her.

She melted into his kiss, which surprised him at first, and then kissed him back. A soft sigh escaped her lips and he felt the rush of his love and passion burning inside him as he kissed her again. She broke away eventually, breathing heavily.

"What am I going to do with you?" she asked in a soft voice.

"Love me back."

Rhianna shook her head sadly, her eyes on the ground for a few moments.

"I can't," she whispered, the sadness in her voice filling him with grief.

"Why, Rhianna? Could you at least tell me why?" he nearly begged.

"Everyone I love dies," she replied this time, suddenly looking vulnerable and defeated. "I don't want you to die…"

He moved to take her in his arms, but she backed away, shaking her head.

Then, she was gone.

…

They walked to the keep accompanying Hawke who had an appointment with the Viscount the following morning. Fenris was glaring at Merrill at first, but as Velanna was with them as well, he kept his eyes on her instead.

Velanna was quiet the whole trip to the keep. Anders kept a watchful eye on her. She was looking around Hightown interestedly as if making a mental note of where everything was. He didn't like that she was quiet. That wasn't the Velanna he knew. He wondered briefly if Justice had anything to do with her apparent calm.

They met Aveline at the entrance to the keep and she joined the group after Rhianna told her why she was there. When they reached the Viscount, he went on about a Qunari entourage disappearing from his doorstep and Hawke sighed heavily when he asked her to speak to Seneschal Bran.

Rhianna disliked Seneschal Bran.

Aveline perked up when the Seneschal mentioned that he didn't understand how four Qunari could have disappeared as they left the keep when there was a guard stationed at the door. She quickly asked the Seneschal if any guards had failed to report and the Seneschal replied that there had been a few that were missing, adding in a condescending tone that he didn't know where they could find a guard that had been paid money to capture the Qunari delegates.

Anders, Fenris and Aveline quickly responded to that: The Hanged Man was the obvious place to look for the offending guards.

Rhianna thanked the Seneschal coldly and turned around, her group following behind closely as she made her way down the stairs and out of the keep. Anders stole a look at her and smiled inwardly to himself in spite of the seriousness of the situation. He couldn't help himself, really. She looked so beautiful when she was dangerously angry.

…

Excerpt from Anders's Journal:

_OF COURSE I hate templars! They locked me up in solitary confinement for a year! And I'm NOT going to write about that RIGHT NOW - I'm not! So yes, I hate templars! Does Rhianna know I hate templars? Sure! Also, she probably hates them more than I do! But Rhianna goes and takes us right into the Chantry to ask the Grand Cleric about the missing Qunari, her chest heaving admirably. I couldn't enjoy __**that **__view as much as I wanted to because there were around half a dozen templars looking directly at us. (Maker, I hate templars!)_

_Even so, it turned out we never got a chance to speak to the Grand Cleric. Sister Petrice – an old acquaintance of ours that wanted us dead – showed up. It turned out that Sister Petrice, now a __**Mother**__, (I strongly suspected the Maker was having a laugh when I heard her say she was a Mother) was the one that had arranged it all! _

Anders sighed, reading what he had just written. It occurred to him that he hadn't even bothered to explain who this damned Sister/Mother Petrice was. But try as he might he couldn't write it down. Mere words could not describe the evil that emanated from this Chantry mother in waves. He shook his head and squared his shoulders, picking up his quill again.

_I can't shake the feeling that Velanna is not really herself. She took a very noticeable interest in the Chantry and looked around, her eyes taking in all the details. That really bothered me, especially considering how she protested the very first time she was in one, years ago back at Vigil's Keep. The Commander – now Queen of Ferelden – had taken us there to complete a mission and Velanna complained non-stop all the way back to the keep. Therefore, I really felt that it was slightly suspicious that she was taking it all in stride now and not saying a word about the Chantry or the templars, who were looking at every move we made. Maybe she had changed after finding her sister? I mean, her sister had turned into a broodmother – that was a tragedy right there. Could this have been enough for her to change like this? _

_Maybe she has some kind of hidden agenda? _

Anders chuckled at the words he had just written. Velanna really didn't need a hidden agenda because she had Justice, didn't she? Anders continued to write, a smile playing on the corner of his lips.

_So that malevolent sister…er…MOTHER, gives Hawke this address and invites her to go there to see the unrest the Qunari were causing first hand. She tells us that her former bodyguard, Varnell, is to blame and tells Rhianna she would meet us there. _

_It didn't matter anyway. The place we had been so generously 'invited' to was full of fanatics and that foul templar who used to be Petrice's bodyguard. The four Qunari were still alive when we arrived, but Maleficarum Templarus, also known as Varnell or 'former bodyguard', made sure they died. He actually smiled while he cut their throats. We could only look at the whole gory scene before us, frozen in fear. Well, maybe Rhianna was not afraid, but I was. If Maleficarum Templarus had just gone and murdered four Qunari in front of a room full of fanatics who were against the Qunari, I knew we would be next on the list so I readied an ice spell that would hopefully freeze his balls off. _

_No big deal. Only about eighty people wanting to kill us this time! I gritted my teeth and waited for the first wave to attack. _

_And… nothing really happened. Nothing as in: no fighting, no injuries whatsoever on our side, no one died. The stupid mother pointed a finger at Rhianna, who looked like she wanted to slash her into hundreds of little pieces. Then, Petrice bolted. Disappeard. Vanished. No Petrice anywhere. At first I thought it was because she was scared of Hawke, but then I turned and Velanna caught my eye. Only then did I realize it wasn't because of Hawke after all. _

_Unfortunately for the stupid brainwashed fanatics, they had never heard of Velanna and her mighty fireballs. If they had, they would have run away screaming in terror. In fact, when her skin cracked open and glowed blue, I half expected all of them to run in terror at that moment. Petrice did. They did not. Maybe because they were half-crazy and very stupid? Did I mention this before? Well, they were. It was all __**KILL, KILL, KILL **__for them. _

_It came as no surprise to me when Velanna/Justice flung her first fireball at the group right next to MT (Maleficarum Templarus) and fried them all to a crisp. Then she turned to unleash fire at a group of twenty more rushing in to kill us. Within minutes, every single one of the people who attacked us (or tried to attack us) and wanted us dead had vanished and only ashes remained, littering the whole floor of the vast room. _

_Sometimes it's good to have a powerful spirit fighting on your side._

…


	15. Chapter 15

_**Thank you anesor, Apollo Wings, BlessedArrow and Philliwolf5 for your fantastic reviews! I also want to thank all those of you who have put this fic on their list of favorites and are now following it! :D **_

_**My disclaimer as always: Bioware owns everything! I just play with the characters…**_

Chapter 15

The world had surely turned upside down. It couldn't be that this was really happening, could it? Anders rubbed his eyes quickly, just to be sure, but the scene before him was still there.

Rhianna's mother was advancing slowly, on legs that seemed wooden to him – but he knew why she was walking that way. There were stitches all over her body, showing where the monster who had done this to her had sewn all the different body parts together. He turned slightly to look at Rhianna, and her expression made it difficult for him to breathe.

Rhianna gave one bloodcurdling scream, a scream that seemed to come from the depths of her soul and then everything had turned into one unending nightmare when the dead rose from the ground and the abominations attacked them.

Everyone reacted pretty much the same without skipping a beat – they parried, slashed, burned and froze where necessary – all in unison – fighting to stay alive and protect one another, working as a team should work. Nobody paused to think – nobody even turned to look at anyone else. They worked seamlessly, effortlessly, until every single demon, shade and abomination had been sent back to the Fade where they belonged.

The silence that followed the battle was deafening to them as they stood catching their breaths. Anders had his eyes fixed on Rhianna as she threw a dagger at the last undead that attacked and then pulled the blade out from the putrid face where it had embedded itself, wheezing slightly as she sheathed it. She then took two steps back, wiping some blood off her forehead with the back of her hand as she caught her breath.

There was a shuffling noise that broke the silence in the room and not only did Rhianna turned to face the source, but the rest of her friends as well. The broken figure of Leandra Hawke advanced towards her daughter, each step more difficult than the last, until she fell forward, only to be caught by her daughter who put her arms around her.

Both daughter and mother slid to the ground and Rhianna held her gently in her lap, trying to keep her mother's mutilated body as comfortable as she could. She cradled Leandra's head in the crook of her arm with utmost care, keeping her as close as she could, away from the filthy floor. She gave a faint cry when her mother tried to touch her face lovingly, but gave up because she was too weak to raise her arm.

"There's nothing I can do," Anders mournful words tumbled out, breaking the silence of the room. "His magic was keeping her alive."

"Mother," Rhianna cried, the sobs now making her voice crack and break at intervals. "I tried to find you!"

"Shh, darling," Leandra said softly. "That man would have kept me here as a prisoner forever. Now I am free. I get to see your father again, and Carver. But you'll be here all alone…"

"I should have watched over you more closely, I should have – " Rhianna sobbed, her voice an octave higher as the tears choked her.

"I love you," Leandra whispered. "You've always made me so proud…"

Leandra Hawke's eyes dimmed, and the sweet smile on her face was the last thing Rhianna saw before she closed her eyes and her cries filled the room. Aveline made a strangled sound and walked a few steps to the right to try to compose herself, while Varric wiped a few tears from his face. Isabela stood dried-eyed and perfectly still, the sadness on her face betraying what she was truly feeling.

Anders knelt beside Rhianna, one of his arms around her shoulders, his heart breaking into a hundred little pieces as he held her close. He couldn't speak – nothing that he could say would take the pain away.

Nothing at all.

…

Fenris walked quietly into Hawke's room, hesitating slightly when he saw her.

She was sitting on the edge of her bed, looking at the floor, her tear-stained face as red and swollen as her eyes. He advanced slowly, unsure of what to say, feeling sad and forlorn – and strangely uncomfortable when she finally lifted her face to look at him.

"I don't know what to say," he admitted lamely, shifting his weight with a frown. "But I'm here."

Rhianna shrugged, her eyes now downcast, staring at one of the floor tiles intently. She didn't say anything at all for a long while and Fenris's discomfort grew as he stood there, looking down at her.

The door opened again, and Anders walked into the room. He stopped when he saw Fenris, not wanting to intrude.

"I'm sorry, Fenris." Anders's contrite voice surprised the elf, and Fenris blinked back. "I didn't know you were here and just wanted to see if she was doing alright. I'll be downstairs if you need me…"

Fenris nodded once, his dark green eyes unreadable from where Anders was standing. The mage turned to leave, but stopped at the door when Fenris spoke.

"I know she hasn't slept at all," the elf said. "And it's been two days. She hasn't eaten either. Could you help with that?"

"She's in shock," Anders turned, as he replied in a low voice. "I'll tell Orana to make some broth and will bring it up once it's done, if that's alright with you?"

"Yes. That's fine," Fenris replied, keeping his eyes on Hawke who had not moved at all, her eyes still staring blankly at the floor. "What about sleep?"

"I can help with that," Anders sighed. "After she eats something."

A few moments of silence and then, "Thank you, Anders."

Anders turned and walked out, closing the door behind him. He knew Fenris would never trust him, but it was the first time that he and the elf had been more than civil to each other.

It was also the first time he had called him 'Anders' instead of 'mage'.

Even though he was terribly worried about Hawke, Anders couldn't help but smile as he went down the stairs to look for Orana.

…

Fenris left for his mansion after both he and Anders force-fed her some of the stew. After a while, Anders cast a sleeping spell on her and told Fenris he would stay and keep watch over her.

He settled himself in the only armchair in the room, his eyes on her lovely face, watching her as she slept and dozed off after a few hours. When he woke, Rhianna was awake and had her eyes on him. Anders smiled at her as he stretched in the chair.

"Hello," she smiled back. "You look younger when you sleep."

"Are you implying I'm an old man?" Anders protested with a look of mock indignation. "I'll have you know I'm still in my prime!"

She gave a chuckle, then the smile left her face abruptly as she turned her head and stared down at the bed covers.

After a few moments, Anders broke the silence between them.

"It's alright to smile – even to laugh, you know."

She immediately looked up and held his gaze. "I don't know about that. Mother is dead."

"Yes. Your _mother_ is dead – not _you_," Anders retorted a little too fast. He thought he saw something in her eyes, but couldn't tell if it was anger. "I'm sure she liked your smile," he added a few moments later.

Her eyes flicked up at him again and there was something new in them when they met and held his. Something that looked a lot like amusement, but he didn't want to spoil the moment, so he said nothing.

"I'm a bit hungry," Rhianna said slowly. "Anything solid to eat?"

"I'll bring you something," he grinned, relieved to see she was better. "Any preferences?"

"Yes, but you don't want to have sex, so food will be just fine," she shot back – the old familiar twinkle back in her eyes.

"If you continue bringing that up, then maybe next time I'll forget that I told you I don't want any sex," he murmured as he walked towards the door.

"I heard that!" she called out to him in a loud voice.

"Good."

…

As it was, when Fenris returned to the mansion later that day, he found Hawke smiling at Anders and sitting up in bed, eating a ham and cheese sandwich. Although he was happy to see the improvement, he was also jealous of the way she was looking at the mage, which led him to snarl at Anders as he asked him to leave. Rhianna protested angrily and a few moments later, Anders stood up and left anyway because the elf had started to glow and he didn't want his heart ripped out of his chest.

He didn't mind much, because he knew he would be returning later. If he was lucky, Fenris would be gone. If not, he'd just keep on trying until Rhianna was alone.

Without realizing it, he found himself at The Hanged Man. It was early and he should have gone straight to the clinic, but he felt like a drink would help him keep his emotions in check, as he was feeling rather happy that Rhianna was on the road to recovery.

"Hey, Blondie!" Varric called from one of the tables where he sat with Isabela, Merrill, and – Anders groaned when he recognized Velanna.

"Hey, Varric and company," he grinned at them as he sat, avoiding Velanna's eyes.

"Why are you here and not in the clinic? How's Hawke doing?" Varric asked a little anxiously.

Anders smiled. "She's doing so much better, I wanted to celebrate."

"That's great news!" Isabela said and Varric chuckled, nodding his head.

"Was Hawke ill?" Merrill asked with a worried frown. Velanna said nothing, merely crossing her arms, her gaze fixed on Anders.

"Really, kitten? Her mother just died!" Isabela told Merrill with a smile.

"Oh, that! I thought she was ill!" Merrill hurried to reply.

"She's eating now, and slept a little last night, so I imagine she'll be up and about soon," Anders informed the group happily, as he took a swig of the ale Norah had brought to the table for him.

"I'm glad she's on the road to recovery," Varric nodded with a grin. "Things are a bit boring without her around."

"So, why are you all here instead of in your suite, Varric?" Anders asked curiously.

Varric was spared replying to Anders because at that moment, Velanna spoke and everyone turned to look at her as if she had sprouted two heads since she hardly spoke at all.

"You run a clinic?"

Her question was valid for Anders had never said anything about running a clinic in her presence. Nevertheless, he blinked at the question for a few moments, extremely surprised that she would be interested in a clinic to begin with.

"Yes, I do. I heal the people in Darktown, but I also have patients from Lowtown and even Hightown nowadays."

"He's known as the '_awesome_ Kirkwall Healer'," Varric added with a grin.

"Probably because _you_ call me that," Anders said with a shake of his head and a chuckle.

Velanna said nothing, so the rest ignored her politely and continued to tease Anders.

"Kitten," Isabela told Merrill as she brought out her cards. "Are you ready for another lesson?"

Merrill clapped her hands eagerly and her face lit up as she nodded vigorously, while Velanna sat beside her quietly, a thoughtful expression on her face. Varric counted himself in and soon the cards were dealt all around – with the exception of Velanna who shook her head and Anders, who took the present card game as a cue to leave.

"As much as I enjoy the company," he said with a smile as he finished his ale, "I have to get to the clinic and see how things are doing around there."

"See you later, Blondie," Varric waved him off. "Don't be a stranger."

…

A few days later, Rhianna stood at one of the doors to Anders's clinic. She watched him work, her heart thumping in her chest all the while. It was late, so there were enough shadows around for her to blend in easily and remain unseen, which is what she wanted at the moment.

She had been trying to deny the feelings she had for him for some time now, but realized that it was all in vain. Since her mother's death, her feelings for him had intensified. Try as she might, she could not keep the image of Anders away, and seeing him now as he worked - oblivious to her presence - made everything even harder.

When the last patient had been healed, Anders stretched and walked to the table where he kept his potions, putting away some bottles and using a cloth to clean the table afterwards. He turned to walk to the clinic door when Hawke stepped inside the room with a smile.

"Hey! I didn't see you there!" Anders called out in a cheerful voice. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm doing fine," Rhianna replied with a smile. Then her smile vanished and the look on her face puzzled Anders. "Well – no. That's a lie. I'm not fine."

Anders tilted his head, a worried look in his eyes as he stepped closer.

"What's wrong?" he asked as his eyes searched her face, a white-blue glow emanating from his hands as he made an attempt to check her for wounds.

"I have a – um…I'm feeling a – a certain 'discomfort' here," Rhianna pointed to her chest, in the general direction of her heart. "But it only happens when I see you…" she finished lamely, looking at the general direction of the floor with a slight flush.

Anders eyebrows flew up to his hairline and his eyes widened slightly, and then he felt the rush of the pleasant tingling of sparks that started in his stomach and ran up his body, causing him to tremble slightly. He had a lopsided smile on his face as he stepped closer, feeling giddy and a little dizzy.

"I see," he said, his voice a rumble. "Anything else?"

"I feel – I feel very warm and I just can't stop thinking…" Rhianna whispered with a flush.

"You can't stop thinking…" Anders echoed, now standing a mere few inches away – the heat he was feeling spreading all the way down to his groin.

"I can't sleep or think, or do anything, without yearning for you, Anders," Rhianna said, her eyes now lifting to meet and hold his, dark with desire, longing and – was that love?

Anders gave a gasp and closed the distance, capturing her lips hungrily, his arms pulling her into a tight embrace. Rhianna kissed him back fiercely, with a passion that matched his. His hands were now running up and down her back, and hers had found their way into his hair.

A moan escaped her lips and his grip tightened, one of his hands now buried in her hair at the nape of her neck. They continued to savor each other's lips as their tongues battled for dominance – their hands exploring each other desperately.

A few moments later, Rhianna broke the kiss breathing heavily and she looked deeply into his eyes.

"I want to love you back now, Anders – if you'll let me."

…


	16. Chapter 16

_**Wow! So many awesome reviews this time around! Thanks so much BlessedArrow, karebear, anesor, Morninglight, Eynla, Violet Enigma and Apollo Wings for your feedback! I also want to thank all of you who have put this fic in their favorites and who are now following the story! :D **_

_**Nope! No smut in this one! **_

_**Well, maybe a little teeny, weeny bit! :P **_

_**Bioware owns everything! **_

Chapter 16

Velanna stood in front of the Vhenadahl tree, her face a mask of sorrow. She reached out and touched the bark, her fingers glowing blue for a split second.

_The elves are slaves, they must be freed!_

The whole alienage was quiet. Some elves stood in a dark corner chatting happily, oblivious to their surroundings. Velanna glared at them momentarily, the anger burning inside her once again. Why is it that the elves here allowed the humans to treat them this way?

_Mages are slaves as well! Slaves of the Chantry created by man. _

"Worthless shems!" Velanna whispered angrily. "They enslave themselves stupidly when they let the templars take them to the circle!"

_The mages must be freed. The slavery of the elves, the slavery of the mages… slavery must not be condoned. Slavery must not be allowed to continue! _

She sighed at what she knew were Justice's thoughts – even if she could have thought the same about them on her own. A noise behind her made her turn around and scowl.

"Oh! I was looking for you. Dinner is on the table," Merrill said brightly.

"Do not fuss over me!" Velanna said harshly. Merrill's eyes widened briefly and she took an uncertain step back.

"But I wasn't!" she exclaimed. "I just wanted you to know!"

Velanna turned back to the tree. After a few minutes of silence, Merrill turned to go back inside the house, but Velanna's words stopped her.

"Do you know where Anders's clinic is, lethallan?"

"It's in Darktown!" came Merrill's cheerful answer.

"I know that, you foolish woman!" Velanna snapped. "I meant, where exactly in Darktown!"

"I do know, yes. I can take you there tomorrow, if you wish?"

"I want to go there," Velanna replied, turning to face Merrill.

"Oh! You mean right now?" Merrill retorted in a surprised voice. Velanna's eyes narrowed slightly at this and Merrill quickly pulled herself together. "I can take you there, then. If that is what you really want…"

"Yes. I think I need to see it for myself," Velanna replied, a shadow of a smile on her face. "We'll eat and then go."

…

Anders managed to close the door to the clinic behind them as she trailed kisses down the nape of his neck, making a purring noise at the back of her throat that sent another spasm of pleasure tingling throughout his body. His erection throbbed painfully as he gathered her in a tight grip. He lifted her in his arms and she quickly wrapped her legs around his waist. Carrying her straight to one of the huge pillars in the room, he pinned her against it whispering her name, one of his hands on the small of her back, sliding down to her buttocks. She moaned into his mouth as he kissed her passionately.

"Anders!" she gasped as his other hand fumbled with one of the buckles that held her leather jerkin in place.

At that moment, there was a knock on one of the clinic doors and they flew apart, their cheeks a bright vermilion. Anders stared at the door with wide eyes and for the briefest of moments wished the late visitor away. The healer in him protested, however, and soon he crossed the large room in long strides, flinging the door wide open.

"I'm sorry, Healer!" a small boy called out, his head tilting back to look up at his face. "My mother is very ill and I'm afraid she's dying, Ser!"

Anders nodded, quickly turning to retrieve potions and his backpack, glancing at Rhianna.

"I'll help, if I can," Rhianna whispered to him. "I know a lot about potions and I'm not bad with bandages and the like."

He didn't think it would be possible to love her more, but after those words, he discovered that he did.

"Thank you, love," he whispered back.

"But you'll have to come with me afterwards, directly to the estate," Rhianna added, her eyes twinkling.

"If I can take a bath there, then yes," Anders grinned as he flung his pack over his shoulders.

"For shame! Is that all you want, Ser?" Rhianna teased.

"Oh, I'll be sure to show you what I want," Anders leaned over and breathed into her ear. "You'll see…"

…

The boy and his mother lived in one of the many sewer tunnels that crisscrossed the entire area of Darktown. After several twists and turns, and walking to what seemed to them like an eternity, Anders and Hawke arrived at a small opening in one of the walls. The whole hovel was damp and stank of human sweat and garbage.

Rhianna's nose wrinkled slightly, but she gave no other indication of the disgust she was feeling. When she saw the poor woman lying on the floor in a corner, her expression changed to one of sadness and she frowned.

Anders was already kneeling beside her, his hands glowing blue and white at intervals as he scanned the woman who was wheezing and coughing – her mouth opening and closing repeatedly like a fish out of the water. He gave a sigh when he was done, reaching automatically in his pack for one of his stronger embrium potions.

"I'll need your help with this," he turned to Hawke who nodded and knelt right beside him. "We must make sure she swallows the potion…"

Anders uncorked the stopper and turned the woman slightly, so that she was lying on her back, while Rhianna now slid behind the woman's head and lifted it a bit so that Anders could pour the potion directly into the woman's mouth. The woman gagged, but Anders's hand was on the woman's throat and glowed softly as he helped her to swallow, while Rhianna held her head firmly.

Once the potion was down, Anders closed his eyes, and focused, his hands outstretched over the woman. The blue and white glow that emanated from his hands over the woman's chest pulsated and gradually increased. The woman stopped wheezing and gave a sigh, as she finally relaxed and her breathing got easier. Anders closed his eyes and squeezed them, beads of perspiration covering his forehead as the glow from his hands lit up the room completely. The woman sighed, feeling healthy for the first time in a while, and a smile appeared on her face.

Anders was smiling as well when he opened his eyes and looked down at the woman.

"Thank you, Serah!" the woman whispered. "You saved my life!"

He took another bottle from his pack and placed it in one of the woman's hands.

"You must drink this potion tomorrow," he said kindly. "I'll return in the evening to see how you are doing, alright?"

"Yes, Healer!" the woman replied.

Rhianna turned to the boy and took some money out of her purse.

"Here," she told the boy. "Buy something to eat tomorrow for your mother and yourself."

"Thank you!" the lady exclaimed. "He's a good boy. He knows what to get for us. He always knows how to take care of me."

"You mean this always happens to you?" Rhianna was quick to ask.

"Yes, Serah," the woman nodded. "We live in the poorest section of the Underground City. There is no light here, and many suffer from illness and disease. What I have is a disease that comes and goes. But this time it got bad. More terrible than the other times…"

Rhianna said nothing, but her heart went out to the woman and she grimaced sadly. She was quiet when they left the hovel and did not speak at all as they made their way up to the top floor of Darktown. Anders took her hand and squeezed it, and she turned to look at him with a smile.

"I wish I could do more for them," he said contritely. "But as it is, there is nothing I can do about their living conditions."

Rhianna nodded and squeezed his hand back, her eyes thoughtful. They rounded a corner and Anders stopped, his mouth dropping open in surprise.

"Velanna! Merrill! What in blazes are you doing here?" he exclaimed.

"Velanna wanted to see the clinic, but I got lost!" Merrill practically wailed.

"We've been walking in circles," Velanna rolled her eyes. She looked terribly annoyed, but there was no indication of Justice manifesting at the moment.

"I _think_ I can find the way back," Anders murmured to himself, but Rhianna heard him and turned.

"You mean you _don't_ know the way back?" Rhianna's eyes widened.

"I've never been in this part of Darktown before!" Anders explained defensively, looking at the various openings along the walls. "I mean, I've been to several of the sewer tunnels when I had to heal some patients, but never so far from the clinic."

The drip, drip coming from the steady trickle of sewage water running along the walls was the only thing that broke the silence of the area, which was darker than Anders would have liked. His eyes scanned the walls looking for something that would trigger his memory, but everything he could see looked pretty much the same to him.

"Well, we'd better just look around and try to get back," Rhianna finally said. "We won't accomplish anything by just standing around, will we?"

…

There was a light up ahead, and they quickened their pace. The tunnels had turned into a maze full of thugs and mercenaries a while back, full of caves and caverns, and it seemed like ages since they'd seen any proper light. They spotted an entrance that looked like a door that was open.

"What's a _**door **_doing here? Do the mercenaries have different areas they keep locked on occasion?" Anders wondered aloud.

"Your stupidity always fascinated me," Velanna barked back with a sneer. "_That_ hasn't changed either."

"At least you feel some sort of fascination, right?" Anders waggled his eyebrows at her and Velanna scowled.

They stopped when they heard voices coming from the open door. A girl was pleading to someone and they could hear laughter from a group of people as well. Hawke frowned and took the lead.

Rhianna walked through the door, followed by Anders and Merrill, with Velanna in the rear. The scene that met their eyes shocked them into silence at first and they froze.

A mage girl was on her knees – her hands outstretched before her, palms upturned as she begged. The bald templar in front of her had a sardonic smile on his face, his icy blue eyes glittering in the half-light of the area. At least a dozen templars stood around them, laughing at what the templar had just said.

"Please, Messere!" the girl cried out again. "I wasn't trying to escape the circle, I swear! I just wanted to see my mum!"

"So, you finally accept your attempted escape!" the templar exclaimed. "You _do_ know what happens to mages who try to escape around here, don't you?"

"No!" the girl screeched. "Don't make me Tranquil, I beg you! I'll do anything you ask!" the girl babbled frantically.

"That's right!" the templar purred. "Once you're Tranquil, you'll do anything I ask, won't you?"

The girl visibly blanched at the same time that Hawke hissed angrily, understanding the intent behind the words of the templar. She confirmed what she was thinking when the templar made an obscene gesture, grabbing his crotch while licking his lips, and then stretching out his hands towards the girl.

"Get your filthy hands off her!" Rhianna screamed angrily as she unsheathed her daggers. Anders immediately brought his staff out in front of him, and he heard Merrill gasp behind him.

Velanna, however, stepped forward in front of them all, her skin cracked open – her eyes brilliantly glowing, the blue light filling the room as some of the templars stepped back in fear.

"You fiends will never touch another mage again!" Justice/Velanna bellowed, the deep voice booming off the walls and reverberating across the room.

Anders groaned inwardly, a grim expression on his face as he watched Velanna slam her staff on the ground with such a force, it knocked some of the templars off their feet.

_All I wanted was a romantic night with Hawke, and I get this instead. Lovely! _

…

The battle wasn't easy, but it was easier to fight the templars than they initially thought it would be. Velanna herself probably killed six or seven, and fatally injured the rest. Anders was having a hard time trying to keep Rhianna away from Velanna's powerful spells, as he knew that when Rhianna was angry – as she was now – she would forget about the danger surrounding her in her eagerness to attack and maim. When the templars finally lay dead at their feet, Anders's smile and laugh was cut short by Velanna's glowing form now towering over the mage girl who looked up in terror.

Glowing Velanna slammed her staff right next to the girl who cowered and covered her face with her hands. The girl's cry to Velanna filled the room and Anders literally cringed when he heard her words.

"Get away from me, you vile demon!"

Anders's heart sank and he quickly opened his pack, his hand desperately seeking the bottle of lyrium potion he knew was there. If he did not find that bottle, this was going to end very badly.

"I am NO demon!" Justice/Velanna roared. "Are you one of them, that you would call me such?"

"Velanna! She's a mage! We just rescued her from the templars!" Rhianna yelled.

"She belongs to them! I can feel their hold on her!" was Velanna's reply as Anders gulped down the lyrium, praying fervently for his mana to replenish quickly.

"She's a circle mage! She isn't a templar!" Rhianna insisted. "If you kill her, you're killing a mage!"

Velanna's glow intensified as she raised her staff high, intending to slam it on the girl and probably impale or hex her – Anders didn't know or ask – and black smoke suddenly appeared around the blonde elven mage as she let out a yell and started to bring her staff down.

At that precise moment, Anders muttered the incantation for a simple sleeping spell and Velanna dropped her staff, falling to the ground fast asleep. The girl gave a scream and ran up a set of stairs behind her.

"Good call, my love," Rhianna murmured to Anders as she bent to inspect Velanna, who wasn't glowing anymore.

"It was fortunate some of my mana replenished after all. I really thought I wasn't going to make it," Anders sighed dramatically as he sheathed his staff.

Merrill also knelt beside Velanna and shook her head, a worried expression on her face.

"She'll probably sleep for an hour at least, Merrill," Anders said. "The spell will wear off faster than most sleeping spells, because it was such a simple one. I didn't have enough mana at the time to cast a better one, I'm afraid."

"I wish I could have thought of that!" Merrill said in a mournful voice. "I was too afraid to move or think clearly!"

"We can't stay here," Rhianna said. "Can we carry her to the clinic, Anders?"

"That won't be necessary," Anders replied with a smile. "My mana has fully replenished and I could try a rejuvenating spell on her, which would probably wake her up – if that's what you want. But I really prefer her this way. I've never seen her look so peaceful before!"

Rhianna chuckled at Anders's words. "She needs to be awake, so that Merrill can take her back home."

Anders nodded and cast his spell. Within minutes, Velanna woke up and blinked her eyes several times sitting up with a confused look on her face. Both Merrill and Anders helped her up.

"What happened?" Velanna asked in a shaky voice.

"You nearly killed a mage, Velanna," Anders shook his head. "I can't believe Justice would do something like this. He always wanted to protect others, not murder them."

Velanna frowned, her eyes sweeping over Anders haughtily. "If she is a slave of the templars, she is better off dead!"

And with those words, she stormed up the stairs that led up to the main floor of Darktown, with Merrill running to catch up with her after a quick goodbye to Anders and Rhianna.

"I don't like this at all," Anders said quietly.

"Why is that?" Rhianna asked, as he took her hand to lead her to the stairs.

"Justice wasn't at all like this. This…is something _different_."

"Do you think the spirit may have changed then?" Rhianna looked up at Anders briefly with a worried frown on her brow. "Is that even possible?"

"I don't know…Velanna _has_ always been a very angry person. I just don't like what I'm seeing, that's all."

…

They didn't see Velanna when they finally reached Darktown proper, but the mage girl that Anders had saved approached them as they walked towards the stairs that would take them up to Lowtown.

"You saved my life, Messere! I don't know how to thank you!" the girl curtseyed in front of Anders and Rhianna. "What was that…thing?" she added shakily.

"She's just a confused woman," Rhianna hurried to say, while Anders shook his head and chuckled.

"She's also a _bit_ insane," he muttered. Rhianna glared at him and he winked playfully at her.

"Can I go home to my mother, now?" the girl asked.

"Yes, but try to keep out of sight. I would leave Kirkwall if I were you," Rhianna said.

The girl nodded. "Thank you again, Serah!" Then she turned, sprinting into a run and was soon out of sight.

Anders took Rhianna in his arms. "I'm really dying for that bath, now!"

Rhianna gave him a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes, but she had to laugh when his stomach rumbled. "I wouldn't mind a bath myself. I see you're hungry, too!"

"I'm a Grey Warden. Grey Wardens have terribly big appetites," he said as he leaned a bit to give her a chaste kiss.

"Well, let's go to the estate. I can fix you something to eat while you take a bath," Rhianna said with a glint in her eye. "Does that sound all right to you, my wonderful healer?"

He laughed. "That sounds just perfect, my love."

"Let me pamper you and take care of you for a change," Rhianna grinned. "You saved that girl's life!"

"I'm looking forward to your pampering," Anders whispered in her ear as they took the stairs up to Lowtown, pulling her into a tight embrace.

…


	17. Chapter 17

_**Thanks so much Apollo Wings, Blessed Arrow, Morninglight, anesor, Violet Enigma and karebear for the wonderful reviews! Cookies and cake for all of you! I also want to thank all those of you who have put this fic on their list of favorites and are now following it! :D **_

_**A huge thanks to my lovely beta Eynla for her help with this chapter! **_

_**The beginning of this chapter has smut in it, so it's NSFW! If you feel it will offend you, then skip to the first break. You have been warned! **_

_**My disclaimer as usual: Bioware owns everything. I just play with the characters! **_

Chapter 17

Anders sank deeper into the hot water in the tub, closing his eyes briefly as he relaxed completely. He heard Hawke bump against something in the next room and her curses made him smile and chuckle softly.

He couldn't believe he was taking a bath and Hawke was waiting for him in the other room. Even though he didn't like what had happened with Velanna, things were really looking up again and Anders grinned at what was coming.

The marble tub he was in was fairly large – in fact, it could comfortably fit two. He imagined he would be taking a great many number of baths in it with Rhianna in the future.

_So relaxing! _

He didn't realize he had actually dozed off until the loud knocking on the door startled him and he sat up quickly. The once hot water was now lukewarm at best, and he shivered slightly, rubbing his eyes and yawning.

"What in blazes are you doing in there?" Rhianna called at the door. "What about _my_ bath?"

"Come on in, then!" Anders called. "I'd love to lather you really well. All. Over."

Hawke's laughter on the other side of the door caused his own laughter to fly freely from his lips. The happiness he was feeling at the moment was like a drug to him. He couldn't really remember when he had felt this happy before. Ever.

The door opened, and she appeared, her eyes twinkling, wrapped in a robe that was several sizes too big for her and her hair was wet, which told him that she had already taken a bath. He grabbed a towel and stepped out, wrapping it firmly around his waist as she watched, the desire in her eyes making him tingle with anticipation. When he finally stood before her, her perfumed scent reached his nostrils and he felt light-headed. It took a great deal of effort on his part not to sweep her up in his arms at that moment. Rhianna licked her lips seductively, causing his knees to feel weak.

"Your hair is wet," he said in low voice. "You lied to me…"

She giggled and stepped closer. "I had Orana prepare a bath for me in the guest bathroom. You've been in here for _so_ long! Are you trying to ignore me? I've been waiting practically forever for you to come out!"

"I'm going to have to punish you for lying to me." His low voice was a rumble and his brown eyes were dark with desire as he took her in his arms and pulled her close.

Their kiss was gentle, but not without passion. She broke it off and a half-growl escaped his lips in protest, but she took his hand, leading him to her bed.

They fell on the bed, still entangled in each other's arms, Anders now trailing kisses below her ear as his hands slowly parted her robe. She tugged at his towel, which fell around him on the bed.

Her eyes were fixed on his erection and just as she was reaching out, he grabbed her hand, shaking his head.

"No. You aren't allowed to do that yet," he whispered with a lopsided grin.

He devoured her lips, cutting off her response, and held her hands together over her head against the pillow with his left hand, while his right hand caressed her breast. Rhianna let out a moan that nearly did him in. A hiss escaped his lips as his mouth made its way to her lovely breasts. Pausing for only a few moments to glance at her, he noticed her cheeks were flushed and she was slowly arching her back. She had never looked more beautiful to him than at this moment. His tongue flicked over a hardened nipple and she gasped, her teeth biting her lower lip momentarily.

He let go of her hands and then moved to her other breast with his mouth as his hand traveled lazily south. Anders then focused, reaching into the Fade and sparks flew from his fingertips over her skin. She gave a cry of pleasure that made him smile. His hand slipped past her dark curls and instead traveled up and down her thigh playfully while she suddenly opened her legs wide and arched herself up to him again.

His erection throbbed painfully, but he held on to what little self-control he still had and even though he knew what she wanted, he ignored her wish completely and continued to caress and lick and suck everywhere else.

"Anders, please!" she cried out at last, and he smiled before his hand finally parted her folds. He began to tease her nub, sending sparks out at intervals. He then inserted a finger in her core and she mewled with pleasure and arched her back again, her hands falling on his head, her fingers raking through his hair.

He took his time, pausing and kissing; all his movements maddeningly slow until Rhianna grew impatient again and cried out. He ignored her, and inserted another finger inside her. She sat up with a growl, moving against his hand desperately – seeking the release he was denying her.

"Anders, please! I need you!"

"What do you want me to do, my love? Tell me…," he said in a low voice as his lips now reached her inner thigh.

She lay back and his thumb found her nub again, and massaged it. He took his fingers out of her, and she protested with a curse.

"Language, love!" he whispered in a mock, shocked voice.

"I – I want you, I need you! Please, my love," she begged.

He finally buried his face between her legs, and licked her nub, then suckled it. She gave a cry of pleasure as he inserted his fingers into her core again, in and out, reaching her sweet spot over and over until he felt her shudder and tighten around them. He lapped up her juices and loved the way she tasted, loved the sounds she was making at the back of her throat.

When he lifted his head to look at her as she lay on the bed, she was breathing heavily. Her beauty nearly left him breathless, and he had to force himself to look away to continue kissing her all over. She sat up to kiss him after a while. Her hand found his erection and he hissed with pleasure when she started to stroke him gently. The sparks flying from his fingertips continued to entice her and she kissed him again, and then bent down over him, eager to take his arousal into her mouth, but he stopped her.

"If you do that, I'll not last, love," he whispered. "Let me be the one to cherish you tonight."

Very gently, he positioned her in the center of the bed, and softly caressed her, whispering words of endearment as he touched every inch of her soft skin. He bent over her body, his mouth finding his way over to her breasts and her pink nipples. He spent his time there, gently teasing and caressing, licking and suckling until she moaned repeatedly, once again on fire from his ministrations.

He positioned himself over her, using his hands to keep his body weight from crushing her and kissed her passionately again, his heart thumping madly in his chest, his mouth making its way to her ear. "I love you," he whispered. "I love you so much…"

One of her legs suddenly encircled his waist, and she ground herself against his arousal, which caused him to moan with pleasure. She smiled as she looked into his eyes and held his gaze, and he gave a gasp and captured her lips again, his fingers lightly touching her, the sparks flying over her skin, making her sigh and cry out, calling his name.

He couldn't take it anymore. He had to have her. He pushed gently into her, sheathing himself inside very slowly, until he was completely buried to the hilt. She pulled him down for another passionate kiss and then another, unable to stop, the sounds she was making etching themselves into his very soul.

She was so hot and tight, he thought he was going to lose control completely and had to stop himself from thrusting in and out of her – he first wanted to savor the moment: the feeling of being whole, of being one with her, which caused him to look down into her eyes with adoration.

"I love you, Anders," she whispered.

A gasp from him as he pressed his forehead against hers, and he began to move in and out, each thrust bringing him closer to his release. She matched her movements to his, her hands running lightly along his forearms and reaching his shoulders.

"Rhianna," he gasped, his pace quickening when she started to moan, moving with him in unison.

"Faster, my love, please!"

This time, he did not ignore her request, and their pace quickened. When she finally tightened around him, a cry escaped her lips as she came. A few moments later, with a final thrust, he followed her over the edge, crying out her name as he released his seed deep inside her.

He sighed deeply, pressing his forehead into her shoulder – his feelings for her making him smile – the joy in his heart quite unlike anything he had ever felt before.

Maker, how he loved this woman!

After a while, he pulled her with him as he rolled over to lie on his back. She put her head on his chest and his arms went around her protectively.

They lay there catching their breaths and snuggling against each other. She had a smile on her face and he chuckled as he kissed the crown of her head gently.

"That was…perfect," she whispered. "It was…like nothing I've ever experienced before…"

"That's because we didn't have sex, love," he murmured back, his hand caressing her head softly. "We made love to each other. There's a difference, you know…"

She hugged him and chuckled, lifting her head to look up at him, her violet eyes bright in the half-light of the room.

"Hmmm?" he asked, his hand raking her hair gently – the look on his face tender and loving.

"Want a sandwich?"

…

The following day they stayed in bed long enough to make love and then bathed together in the marble tub in the adjacent bathroom. They had a late breakfast in the dining room, discussing what they would do during the remainder of the day. Rhianna wanted to accompany him to the clinic, as she wanted to visit the woman that Anders had cured the day before.

After breakfast, she led him down to the cellars with a smile and showed him around. Even though Anders had thought the place was huge, he didn't actually know how big until they walked around the cellar and finally ended up emerging from a door into Darktown, right across from the doors of his clinic.

"I'm impressed," he said with a smile.

"I'm glad. I wanted to talk to you about the cellars. Most of the rooms are empty and they could be put to good use," Rhianna grinned.

"Good use?" Anders echoed curiously.

"A place for the people like the lady you saved yesterday. It would keep her from getting ill all the time, wouldn't it?" Rhianna replied, her eyes holding his.

Anders blinked back, totally surprised. He took a step forward and took Rhianna in his arms, the slow smile on his face turning into a grin and then a chuckle.

"I like what I'm hearing, even though most of the people in Darktown are proud and do not take kindly to charity," he said.

"I know that well enough," Rhianna smiled back. "But there will be some who will accept and that is enough for me." She then took two keys from a necklace she always wore, and gave them to Anders.

"What are these?" he asked looking down at them.

"The big one is the key to the door here into the cellars. The other one is the door that leads up into the estate for you to use when you…come home every night," she ended up saying, her cheeks suddenly pink.

The words he had just heard made his heart thump a little faster. He captured her lips in his, holding her as closely as he could and thanked the Maker for her.

"I was about to ask you if you didn't mind my moving in with you," Anders said with a twinkle as soon as they came up for air. "I didn't think you could read minds."

"I don't think I could live without you," she replied.

"Maker, I love you so much!" he cried as his lips descended on hers again.

Two days later, the woman and her son were safely led to one of the rooms in the vast Amell cellar. Two more families joined her not a week later, and Anders came home to Rhianna every night, overjoyed to finally have a place he could call home.

…

A couple of weeks later, Hawke and Anders met with Varric at The Hanged Man for a game of Diamondback. It was the first time any of their friends would be seeing them as a couple, which they made evident to the whole group when they arrived holding hands.

"Well, well, well," Varric said with a smile. "I see you both finally decided to come see your friends?"

Isabela smirked and Merrill smiled, although it was hard to tell if she was smiling because she noticed what was going on. Fenris, on the other hand, gave Anders a murderous stare and scowled. Velanna, who was sitting next to Fenris, merely looked at Anders with a bored expression on her face.

"Hello to you, too," Rhianna laughed as she sat on one of the two empty chairs in the room, pulling Anders down so that he sat beside her. As soon as Anders sat down, he dragged his chair closer to her and draped an arm around her shoulders.

"We decided to come and join you in a game, but the real reason is that Hawke needs some help with a problem," Anders said with a smile.

"What's the problem?" Varric asked with a nod, an amused gleam in his eyes as he glanced at Fenris first and then Anders. He then proceeded to calmly deal the cards and nobody spoke for a while as they focused on the game.

"The Viscount has sent me a missive. Knowing the Viscount, it's probably something dangerous, so I'll need your help for whatever it is that he wants done," Rhianna said, looking at the cards she held in her right hand and then placing her bet on the table.

"We'll help in any way we can, you know this," Fenris said a little too eagerly. He met Anders's bemused expression with a frown, staring back at him, the hatred in his eyes apparent to all who were sitting at the table.

Rhianna smiled sweetly at Fenris and turned her attention back to Varric.

"Well, I was thinking that if you wanted to help, you could come with us to the keep and wait until I've spoken to the Viscount," Rhianna said reflexively then smiled.

"Count me in," Fenris quickly said, his voice a little bit louder than usual, causing Isabela to snort at his reaction. Fenris bristled at this and glared at her, but Isabela didn't even look at him.

"I'd like to go," Isabela replied, looking at Anders and then stealing a glance at Fenris. "I'm sure things will get…interesting."

A chuckle escaped Rhianna's lips and Anders smirked, more to himself than anyone else.

After playing quietly for a while, Anders suddenly cried out triumphantly, slamming his cards on the table with a grin.

"Two Queens and _two_ Priestesses," he smirked. "Can anyone beat that?"

Varric groaned a little louder than Isabela. "Andraste's tits! It's hard enough to get _one_ Priestess! I wish I hadn't taught you how to play, Blondie! It was so much better when you sucked at this game!"

…

The Viscount wanted Rhianna to convince his son, Seamus, to come home. Apparently, the boy had left to join the Qunari at the docks.

Rhianna's jaw nearly hit the floor when she heard this. She shook her head and then frowned.

"Your son is of age, Your Excellency," she said softly. "He should be allowed to decide what he wants to do with his life."

"You must understand, Hawke. I do want to let him live as he wishes, but for a person in my position…This would be terrible if people found out. He is in the Qunari Compound. Just find him and talk to him, please. At best, my opponents will claim that my office is now in Qunari hands. At worst, I lose my son."

"You know this will only end in trouble," Rhianna shook her head.

"Fitting," Dumar replied. "That's where it all started. My son is not foolish. He will listen to reason. Please. Just do what you can, Serah Hawke."

…

Excerpt from Anders's Journal:

_It's not that I like the Qunari, but I sure did dislike that Petrice and I know Rhianna felt the same way. Well, 'dislike' as in 'I want her dead'. Unfortunately, one of the Qunari showed up and shot her with an arrow – ah, I mean TWO arrows… Good aim, too! The first arrow landed in her chest, the second landed in her forehead, right between her eyes. _

_I glanced at Rhianna and I saw her muttering something to herself angrily. I knew she was angry because the Qunari had showed up and killed Petrice, beating her to it. I also knew because I had wanted to kill Petrice just as much as she did. Now Petrice lay on the floor at our feet, the blood pooling around her while we just turned to look at the Qunari in silence. _

_The Grand Cleric, who had turned her back on Petrice and was walking up the stairs turned to look at us then, and quietly asked us to get the Viscount. _

_The Viscount mourned his dead son and asked Hawke to leave, so we did. As we made our way down the stairs, we talked about what had just happened. Well, Varric and I talked. Liri was too busy scowling to offer any comment. He said good night to us and walked towards his mansion. The one he'd kept after Danarius left Kirkwall, rather…which I suppose was good enough for him. It would have been a nicer place if he cleaned it once in a while, though! _

_It's not that I disliked the elf. Well, maybe I did – just a little. I really wish he would stop staring at my Rhianna, already! _

_Just saying! _

_As soon as we got home, I took Rhianna up to our room (thrilling to write that) and pampered her. First, I prepared a bath for her, then I bathed her, and then I made sure she had something to eat._

_And then, I showed her just how much I appreciated having her in my life. _

_All night long, in fact. _

…


	18. Chapter 18

_**Thanks so much anesor, Morninglight, karebear, Violet Enigma, and Apollo Wings for your awesome reviews. You all rock and I love you all! **_

_**I'd also like to thank Apollo Wings for pointing out something about Aveline that had been bothering me for a while. I felt compelled to write about this as an outrageously cheeky and disrespectful Anders, who dares to question Aveline in this chapter. You totally rock, honey! **_

_**Very special thanks go to my lovely beta CouslandSpitFire for her suggestions and chats and everything else! She takes time off her busy schedule to help me out and I really, really appreciate it! :D **_

_**So, this is something that happens in the game which most of you already know about. There are a few tweaks and changes here and there, even if I did use some of the in-game dialogue! (Uh, sorry about that!) **_

_**Also, I did empower Rhianna a bit in this chapter. Notice this fic is actually something Anders is writing about in his journal, so he gives her hero-like qualities and will not cease to sing his praises about her. I probably won't need to point out that Bioware has the knack of empowering their main characters/heroes also, turning them to semi-gods, but just in case I'm mentioning it, too. This is a fantasy fic, after all. :D **_

_**Please feel free to write your feedback as a review or PM me about anything you want! :D **_

_**Bioware owns EVERYTHING, I swear! **_

Chapter 18

Anders woke up at noon and turned on his side with a smile, flinging an arm around where he thought Hawke would be lying. His arm flung over nothing and he frowned as he opened one eye. Hawke's side of the bed was empty.

Groaning, he got out of bed, and reached over to don the robe that Rhianna had worn the previous night. It wasn't very long, but covered the important parts, so he walked towards the bathroom first and a few minutes later padded across the room and opened the door.

The whole mansion was eerily quiet, but he thought he heard noises coming from the kitchen, so in he went. Rhianna was bending over the oven, chatting to Orana happily. He smiled and leaned on the wooden frame, crossing his arms and adoringly watching her every movement. Orana noticed him and curtseyed immediately, mumbling a greeting and Rhianna whirled around with a smile and some flour on her face. Her eyes were twinkling up a storm as she quickly walked towards him.

"Oh! I don't want you to see this! It's a surprise!" she said when she reached him, pushing him gently so that he would leave the room. He chuckled and grabbed her in the dining area, giving her a kiss that made her hum appreciatively.

"Good morning to you too," he whispered after the kiss, his brown eyes warm. He wiped the flour off her face and then ended up caressing it softly. "What's the surprise?"

"It's a secret," Rhianna chuckled. "If I tell you, I'd have to kill you."

"Then, I'll wait to be surprised! Why are you dressed? Are we going somewhere?"

"No, not really. No missives from the Viscount, or anyone, so we're free today!" Rhianna said.

"That sounds unbelievable," he said with a grin. "What shall we do, then? Besides the obvious I mean…"

He waggled his eyebrows at her and she laughed. "It sounds like you have something in mind," she flirted, batting her eyelashes at him. "Before you go and suggest what I know you will, I did want to go get some herbs for potions at Elegant's stall. Would you care to join me?"

"I would _never_ let you go alone," Anders murmured. "You're stuck with me."

"I wouldn't call that 'stuck', but I appreciate you are around," she purred.

"What about whatever you were making in the kitchen?" Anders smiled.

"I've told Orana what to do. It isn't hard, she only has to watch the oven and…take it out," she grinned.

"I'll go get dressed," he said with a smile.

…

They had spent the day together, laughing, making love, and eating an early dinner, with pie as dessert, which had been made especially for him. Anders pretty much felt like the luckiest man alive by the time he was done eating the pie Rhianna had made for dessert.

"I never told you this, but pie is one of my favorite things," he said around his second helping.

"Then, I'm glad," Rhianna replied with a smile.

"This was delicious," Anders remarked. He was smiling, but then he grabbed her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "No one has ever cooked a meal for me before. I really appreciate it, Rhianna."

There was a knock on the door and Rhianna turned to look at the open door that led to the foyer.

"And here I thought we would be getting a whole day to ourselves," she sighed, shaking her head.

Before she could stand up to see who it was, there was a second knock, and voices coming from the foyer. The voices changed to screams. She recognized Isabela's voice and frowned as she stood up, hurrying into the next room with Anders close behind.

Isabela and Aveline were shouting at each other, in the middle of an intense argument. She stood there, without uttering a word until she saw Isabela lifting a hand to strike Aveline.

"Are there any good seats left?" Rhianna interrupted, walking right up to the two women, with Anders right beside her.

"Hawke!" Aveline said, slightly out of breath. "The Arishok is sheltering two fugitive elves in the Compound, who have 'converted' to the Qun. I need you to come with me to convince him to release them. He's already feared because of Petrice. If people start to think that he can ignore the law –"

"I'm going to die!" Isabela cried out, interrupting Aveline. Rhianna turned to look at Isabela, her eyes widening slightly. "There. Got your attention. Real problem!"

"All right, why don't we start over?" Rhianna frowned. "What's this about?"

"Remember the relic that Castillon wants?" Isabela asked. "Remember he's going to kill me if I don't give it to him? Well, a man called 'Wall-Eyed' Sam has it. If you help me get it, I won't die. Please!"

"I'm trying to keep the entire city from rioting against the Qunari!" Aveline argued.

"What if you go to the Qunari and speak to the Arishok, and he reacts badly to what you're suggesting, Aveline?" Anders said, interrupting the ginger guard. "What then?"

Aveline turned to Anders with a frown, her eyes flashing angrily for a few moments. "What?" she sputtered out.

"I'm just saying that the Arishok seems to take his 'converts' really seriously. Are you sure you want to do that? He seemed to be pretty set on protecting the Viscount's son," Anders calmly said, draping an arm around Rhianna comfortingly and pulling her close.

Aveline's jaw dropped. "And what if the people riot against him? What then?" Aveline snapped.

"What if the Arishok starts a war just because _you_ want to take his 'converts' away? Who loses then?" Anders countered.

"We'll help Isabela first," Rhianna decided, interrupting them both before it turned into something nasty. "I don't want her to be killed by Castillon."

"Are you sure about this, Hawke?" Aveline asked.

"I'm pretty sure," Rhianna smiled. "Wait for me at the Qunari Compound. We'll retrieve the relic for Isabela, then meet you there."

Aveline nodded and walked out. Isabela's smile made both Anders and Rhianna smile as well.

"Let's pick up Varric on the way," Rhianna grinned. "He'll _never_ forgive me if we do this and he isn't around to witness it."

…

It turned out that Varric wasn't alone, but playing cards with Fenris, who offered to go with them as well. They arrived at the area where Wall-Eyed Sam was supposed to be, and found a large group of Qunari waiting for them. Rhianna frowned and narrowed her eyes suspiciously.

"Halt!" The leader of the group said in a commanding voice. "You will surrender the relic!"

"I don't have your stupid relic," Isabela replied haughtily.

"The bas has no honor! Vinek kathas!" the Qunari shouted.

They attacked and Rhianna gave an angry cry, jumping straight at the leader and slashing him.

Anders felt fear squeeze his heart for a painful moment, then breathed easier when Fenris quickly delivered a blow and the Qunari focused on him, rather than Rhianna, who had rolled on the ground in the meantime in order to attack the Qunari from behind. Varric delivered a volley of arrows that slowed the rest of the Qunari down, and the rest of the group continued to slash and maim the enemies until they all lay dead at their feet.

"If the Arishok asks why we killed all his men, we'll say it was an accident," Rhianna sighed.

"There's something you should know, Hawke," Isabela told her with a worried frown. "The relic belongs to the Qunari and they probably want it back."

Rhianna's eyes widened slightly. "Excuse me?" she asked in a frosty tone.

"I've always known what the relic is," Isabela sighed, deciding to come clean with her friend once and for all. "I just didn't want to…worry you."

"You're the picture of kindness, Rivaini," Varric frowned.

"The relic is a Qunari text handwritten by that philosopher of theirs – Keslan, Cousland…whatever his name is," Isabela added.

"Koslun?" Fenris asked, a surprised look on his face.

"That's the one!" Isabela exclaimed.

"Koslun is the founder of their religion," Fenris said. "The most revered being in their history. That text would be sacred beyond measure."

"Well, I stole it from them and they followed me here to reclaim it, and…it's the reason why they're still in Kirkwall," Isabela said sadly. "They can't leave the Free Marshes without it, in fact."

"So they've been here all the time waiting to get the book back?" Varric sighed, shaking his head. "That book could have saved us so much trouble!"

"If we give it back to the Arishok, it could solve Aveline's problem," Rhianna commented.

"That mess is over a couple of elves. I need this book to save my own skin." Isabela was starting to sound a little frantic and there were a few moments of uncomfortable silence.

"What about your shipwreck? Was that a lie, too? Or is that the truth?" Rhianna asked.

"Partly," Isabela replied. "I also had the Qunari dreadnought stuck to my behind like a bad rash, spitting fire and thunder at me."

"I can't imagine _you_ stealing this priceless relic," Fenris added dryly. "How exactly did you manage to do that?"

"The Orlesians had the book, and were taking it by ship to the Arishok. I just stepped in and stole it from them. But the Arishok and his stupid dreadnought had already arrived. Getting the relic was easy. Getting away from the Qunari was the hard part."

"Well," Rhianna finally smiled. "It sounds like the Qunari take their reading very seriously!"

"Is there anything that the Qunari don't take seriously?" Isabela smiled back, but immediately grew serious again. She took a step towards Hawke, shaking her head. "Look. The book is right in that building" – she pointed to one of the foundries – "and I'm not letting it slip away again. It's the only thing that will get Castillon off my back. Please tell me you'll give the relic to me."

Anders knew what Rhianna would reply immediately. It was no secret that Isabela was like a sister to her. "It's yours," Rhianna said firmly. "Your life depends on it."

Isabela was surprised by Hawke's words though, and was even struck dumb for a few seconds.

"Really? I…wasn't expecting that. It's nice to have someone on my side, for once," she added, then smiled. "Come on. We have no time to waste."

They followed Isabela into the foundry to the largest room, where a mage was questioning a small man with very big, round eyes. There were two more mages beside the one asking the questions and they stood behind her. At that moment, a group of Qunari made an appearance and started a fight with the mages. Wall-Eyed Sam saw the opportunity to escape and broke into a run towards the exit. Isabela ran after him and Hawke, Anders, Fenris and Varric, were left in the room, with a Qunari soldier running towards them to attack.

They fought both the Qunari and the mages and once the battle was done, Rhianna spent some time looting the dead and then headed for the exit herself, with her party following close behind.

When they stepped outside, Isabela was gone, and Wall-Eyed Sam lay dead on the stone floor. Rhianna frowned as she approached him, noticing a parchment pinned on his tunic. She took it and read it aloud to the rest of the group.

"_Dear Hawke,_

_I have the relic, and I am gone. I'm sorry it has to be this way. You've been a loyal ally, but this is best for us both. You promised me the relic, and I know you'll fight Castillon for me, but I don't want this. I've dragged you too far into this mess already. _

_You don't have to forgive me, but I hope you understand. _

_Isabela."_

"She's gone then?" Anders commented. "Can't say I blame her."

"Once a thief, always a thief," Fenris muttered, the disgust in his voice apparent. Varric simply shook his head in silence, a worried expression on his face.

"Come on," Rhianna said with a sigh. She didn't have the time to reflect on what all this meant at the moment, so she did what she always did and focused on what had to be done. "We still have to head over to the docks to help Aveline with that mess."

"I _can't_ wait to get there," Anders murmured behind her, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

…

They practically ran towards the docks, finally reaching the Qunari Compound where Aveline was waiting with some of her guards. The Qunari at the gates would not let all of them inside, so Anders watched Rhianna, Aveline, and her guards leave and the gates closing behind them with fear clutching his heart. He didn't like it one bit.

Varric took one look at Anders's eyes and worried frown and started chatting about Diamondback and other non-important stuff, hoping to distract him. But Anders was so engrossed in his thoughts that he didn't pay much attention. A young woman ran up to him letting him know that her mother was in need of attention at his clinic, so he turned to Varric and Fenris, asking them to come with him.

Once at the clinic, he tended to the woman, while Varric and Fenris waited patiently for him not too far away.

"Hey, Varric?" Anders called from where he stood. "Pack up some extra potions for me, will you? They're on that table, in the first cabinet on your left."

Varric nodded and did as he was told, and Anders turned back to the woman with a smile.

The healing took longer than expected, and by the time it was done, Anders looked up only to see more people making their way inside the clinic.

"What's going on?" he asked one of them.

"There's been a commotion at the docks, Ser," the young man replied. "Some are saying the Qunari are attacking the city!"

Anders looked at Varric and Fenris in alarm and he rushed to the door, turning to address the refugees still inside.

"Try to keep quiet and calm," he said. "You'll probably be safer here, but stay alert and run to hide if you see any Qunari around!"

"We'd better head to the docks, Blondie," Varric said. "I just checked outside and there are a lot of people around."

"It looks like the people in Lowtown are coming down here to escape the Qunari attack," Fenris added with a nod.

"We'll have to stay together," Anders said. "Let's take the stairs that lead up to the docks. Hopefully we'll find Aveline and Rhianna there."

They silently agreed to this and as they squeezed through the crowds of agitated people looking for safe shelter in Darktown, Anders stole a glance at both Varric and Fenris and saw they were worried, too.

_Maker, please! Protect Rhianna and I promise I'll go to the Chantry more often. _

Anders grimaced.

_Okay. That was a lie. But I'll do something that you like, I promise! _

…

Aveline and Rhianna were heading towards the stairs that led to Darktown when they ran into Anders, Fenris and Varric. Anders uttered a cry and took Rhianna into his arms, whispering his thanks to the Maker fervently.

"I thought they got you! Darktown is full of people trying to get away from all this," he added.

"They very nearly did," Rhianna told him. "The Arishok has declared war on Kirkwall. His men killed Aveline's guards. I still can't believe we managed to escape."

"We'll have to head to the Keep," Aveline said, pursing her lips. "We can rally my guardsmen there and will be able to fight them better."

"All right," Rhianna said, looking up the staircase that led to Lowtown. "Let's poison our weapons. I've got just the thing in my pack."

She went around and gave them each a small vial, and they got to work coating their weapons with it.

"It's a debilitating poison. It'll help transfer more damage to the Qunari with each hit – debilitating them," Rhianna explained.

"Hence the name," Anders quipped with a grin. Rhianna relaxed a bit after his words and actually smiled.

Once they were done, Rhianna took the lead, a grim expression on her face.

"Let's kick some Qunari arse," she said, a determined and fierce expression on her face. "They'll wish they never set foot in Kirkwall!"

…

Excerpt from Anders's journal:

_The worst thing that can happen to you is when you are in love and the person you love calmly agrees to fight a huge horned giant. Notice I'm writing 'horned'. As in the boney things that protrude from the general area of the head. As in…Qunari horns. As in the __**Arishok's**__ Qunari horns. _

_Let me start over. I'm writing this by candlelight as my love lies sleeping so I'll try to make it quick before she wakes up and tries to read my journal again. _

_We must have fought hundreds of Qunari as we made our way to Hightown the night of the battle. Literally hundreds. One of the worst moments was when we encountered a group of Wardens and Bethany was there with them. It should have been a happy moment, I know. But the thing is that one of my worst fears had come true. Bethany had indeed changed a lot since we last saw her when she was tainted in the Deep Roads. __She was bitter now, and blamed her sister for everything. _

_I cleared my throat, hoping to tell her she was wrong, but Rhianna glanced at me with wide eyes… which was my cue to shut up. And so, I did. Rhianna was heartbroken when Bethany left with the wardens, and not because she was leaving. It was clearly because 'Sunshine' had nearly spat her words out while she was talking to Rhianna. She sounded so bitter. So angry! Not Sunshine any more. I glanced at Varric and saw the sad look in his eyes and knew that he was also thinking the same thing._

_I was feeling bad after that, and tried to give Rhianna a quick hug and murmur something to comfort her, but she shied away from me. So, we focused on killing Qunari. Which, by the way, allowed her to perk up and actually smile after a while. _

_Yes. I know. I can't believe I fell in love with a killing machine, either. _

_Anyway, where was I? Ah, yes. We finally arrived to the stairs that would take us to Hightown, only to be ambushed by a group of Qunari and __**elves**__ – I actually turned to Fenris - uh, Liri - and might have frowned – who wanted us dead. Those just kept coming and coming and I had to drink two lyrium potions, because my Lyrium source kept getting away before I could use the lyrium on him to replenish my mana. Oh, well. _

_So in Hightown we came up against a Sten – supposedly a very powerful creature among the Qunari. (And I'm NOT going to read what I just wrote because I'd just burst out laughing and this would wake Rhianna) He went down in two seconds flat, thanks to one of the elf's mightiest blows ever and Rhianna's brilliant and deadly backstab. After that, it was all a matter of killing the Saarebas (Qunari mage) that appeared, because those were deadly. I often wondered afterwards if the Qunari took their mages out into savage thunderstorms, pointed at lightning and told them to kill that way. _

_At any rate, one of them nearly killed us, but then the Knight Commander herself rescued us. _

_Let me tell you now that the Knight Commander is one heck of a scary lady. She wears a crimson hood and has icy blue eyes that would freeze the balls off any man. It was no secret that she hated mages. I discreetly stood behind Rhianna trying to be as inconspicuous as I could, until the conversation was over. She informed us that the Qunari had overtaken the Viscount's Keep. She went to look for her templars, while we headed in the other direction, towards the Keep. _

_When we reached the square in front of the Keep, we battled a number of Qunari. Afterwards, we met the First Enchanter, Orsino. The Qunari had killed a group of mages that had been fighting with the First Enchanter and he had been the sole survivor. But when Meredith (the Knight Commander) caught up with us and saw Orsino, they both got into a fight that spoke volumes. And I mean VOLUMES. Lots of sexual tension there! _

_Anyway, Orsino found a way to get us inside the Keep, by attacking a group of Qunari guarding the entrance. Let me just say that Velanna should speak to the First Enchanter. I was certain his fireballs were as lethal as hers. Maybe because they were both elves? I don't know! At any rate, the Qunari who survived his fireballs ran after him, leaving the entrance unguarded and we finally got inside the Keep. We battled our way into the Throne Room, and one of the first things we saw lying on the floor when we opened the door was the head of the Viscount – no body in sight – and his stupid crown. _

_There were a whole lot of nobles inside the Throne Room – the hostages. And Rhianna looked really angry as she approached the Arishok, even though he expressed his admiration for her and called her basalit-an, which simply means 'worthy of respect.' He told her he could not leave the Free Marches without his precious relic, which Isabela had taken when she left. _

_There was a commotion behind us and Isabela walked calmly ON the Qunari that she had just hit who was lying on the floor. She had returned with the relic after all, and gave it to the Arishok. I sighed with relief, thinking it was all over, but alas. The Arishok wanted to take Isabela with him and Rhianna told him he couldn't and he declared they should fight in a duel TO THE DEATH with Isabela as a prize. I nearly died when I heard her agree to the duel and glared at Isabela, but she was too busy trying to convince the Arishok to duel her. She needn't have bothered because the Arishok ignored her completely. _

_Rhianna battled the Arishok, with all of us watching, and my heart was literally thumping so loudly with fear that I was sure everyone could hear it. But Rhianna was one deadly rogue and had a lot of tricks up her sleeves._

_She had developed a tactic that she later explained was one used by expert duelists, which enabled her to backstab an opponent who was far – clear across the room in this case. The movement was called Vendetta among rogues and very few knew how to use it properly. Aside from allowing her to vanish in a cloud of smoke and moving under stealth quickly, it granted the rogue the ability to critically – if not fatally – wound their opponent. There were few rogues that could achieve this, but Rhianna had mastered it, so the very first thing she did was perform a Vendetta. The Arishok was fatally wounded before he even had the chance to try to figure out what was happening, and even though she had some tar bombs that would immobilize her target, she did not need to use them. She immediately jumped onto the Arishok's back and slashed his throat from behind, then dug her daggers into his back for good measure. _

_The whole thing was over quickly, and the Arishok went down with a mighty crash. The relief I felt left me weak in the knees. Of course, before he died the Arishok ominously declared the Qunari would return one day, but I doubt any of us really cared at that moment. The remaining Qunari turned around and left the Throne Room and all of Kirkwall for that matter. _

_Meredith, Orsino and the templars arrived, expecting to fight the Arishok who lay dead in front of Rhianna, while the nobles cheered all around us, extremely grateful for their lives. Knight Commander Meredith then declared my love the Champion of Kirkwall. She really had no choice in the matter. If she hadn't, I think the nobles would have probably run her over or something. __**That's**__ how hysterically grateful they were at the moment. _

_Rhianna walked towards us through the crowd of cheering nobles, who were reaching out to shake her hand and even touch her shoulder or arm, her eyes on mine. I was grinning so hard, my mouth hurt. As soon as she reached me, I swept her up in my arms in a tight embrace, thanking the Maker that she was safe and extremely proud of my hero – __**my **__Champion: A petite, beautiful woman with a heart of gold who had saved Kirkwall from a Qunari invasion. _

…


	19. Chapter 19

_**Thanks so much to Apollo Wings, Morninglight, anesor, Violet Enigma and eboncat for your feedback! You guys are awesome! **_

_**Special thanks to my lovely betas: CouslandSpitFire and Eynla! I know how busy you are and I really appreciate that you take some time off from your schedules to help me out! Also want to thank my friend, anesor, for some much needed help and suggestions! :D **_

_**This chapter is a chapter that is setting the scene for future chapters in a way. **_

_**My disclaimer as usual: Bioware owns everything, I swear! I just play with the characters! :D**_

Chapter 19

Excerpt from Anders's journal:

_Living with the Champion of Kirkwall was fine most of the time. Rhianna was suddenly thrown into the spotlight and asked to a great number of parties, which she attended, just to keep appearances. This was the part I disliked the most. _

_Don't get me wrong. She took me to all of them and I appreciated that, I really did. But the fact is that I am a mage, and she is a normal woman. If only I had found my blasted phylactery, things would have been totally different. However, I had never been able to find it, even if the former Warden-Commander had tried her best to help me find it in Amaranthine – and __**that**__ had turned out to be an ambush. No phylactery for me! _

_She was given a shiny medal in a formal gathering at the Viscount's Keep. She hated every moment of it, I know. She had her 'get me out of this fast' smile on her face the whole time. It was in this reunion that she met some pretty interesting nobles who fawned all over her while begging her to solve all their stupid problems. If anything, the blasted title gave her more work than ever before. And let's not forget all the headaches!_

_Stupid nobles! _

Anders shut his journal with a sigh and put it away just as he heard Rhianna's footsteps in the foyer, which told him she was finally home. He walked out of the library quickly to meet her with a grin on his face, his heart thumping wildly in his chest just as it always did when he saw her.

"Any luck finding the Reinhardts' dog, love?" he asked holding his arms open for her.

"Bloody dog! It was in their cellar the whole time! Ugh!" Rhianna scowled as she walked straight into Anders's arms. She rubbed her face on his coat, breathing in his scent.

"You smell like lemons," she whispered, taking another deep breath. "And elfroot, too…"

"Perhaps the lemon soap I use to bathe?" Anders chuckled.

"I could stay here forever," she sighed happily, grateful to be home at last.

"I like the sound of that," Anders murmured, lifting up her chin so he could give her a kiss.

Something squirmed inside Rhianna's armor and mewed. Anders's startled eyes looked at her chest, which seemed to be straining to get out.

"You have a meowing chest, now?" he joked. "I can't wait to try it out!"

Rhianna burst out laughing, then hissed, as if in pain. "Ouch!" From underneath her leather armor she pulled out the cutest and smallest white kitten Anders had ever seen. It had very long fur and long whiskers and stared up at Anders with a surprised look in its bright green eyes.

"Mew?"

Anders's face was a sight to see, and Rhianna felt her knees go weak – which also made her forget about the kitten.

"Oooh! What a cute kitty!" he crooned in a soft voice, taking the little thing in his hands and petting it, then scratching underneath its chin. He watched the kitten shut its eyes with pleasure and his lopsided smile made Rhianna's heart skip a beat.

"It's for you," Rhianna said with a warm smile. "The Reinhardts' dog was chasing it in the cellar, so I figured I'd bring him home to you."

"Oh, thank you so much, love!" Anders said in a soft voice, pulling her close, the kitty climbing up to one of his feathered pauldrons. "You don't know how much this means to me."

"I have a pretty good idea," Rhianna smiled up at her handsome mage. "I brought some fish, too. He's probably hungry, poor thing."

The kitten was fiercely batting at Anders's hair, which was tied up in a ponytail as always. Its sharp little nails caught on the tie, pulling it slightly so some of his hair fell onto his face. Anders chuckled as Rhianna led him to the kitchen and put a small parcel on the wooden table, while Orana curtseyed and smiled, clapping her hands when she spotted the kitty.

Anders himself prepared the fish for his cat, after setting the small feline down on the wooden table. He held a small piece of the fish out and patiently waited. The kitten delicately smelled the piece he was offering, and then took it; eating it and immediately licking its mouth and paws before turning its gaze on Anders again.

"I think it wants more," Rhianna laughed.

Anders fed it a couple of pieces and it rubbed his head against his hands as it walked back and forth, purring. "You have long whiskers, don't you?" Anders cooed. "Yes, you do!"

Orana placed a small bowl of water in front of the kitten and it immediately lapped it up.

"Well, I'm going to get a bath started," Rhianna said with a smile.

"I'll help you," Anders replied setting the kitten back on his shoulder. The kitten started to bat Anders's hair again and he chuckled.

"What are you going to call him?" Rhianna walked out of the kitchen with Anders trailing behind her.

Anders looked over his shoulder, the kitten's whiskers tickling his right cheek as it peeked at him curiously with solemn, bright green eyes.

"I think I'll call him Ser Whiskers," Anders beamed.

Rhianna chuckled. "Why am I not surprised?"

…

The reaction of the group to Ser Whiskers was mixed. Varric just made a mental note of the loving expression on Rhianna's face whenever Anders cooed at the cat. Isabela spared a grin in the kitten's direction trying not to look so interested, but failed miserably. Fenris just grunted, then sighed and shook his head. Merrill immediately went up to the little cat, petting it, while Velanna rolled her eyes. Aveline stared at the cat with a warm smile, her hand immediately stretching out to pet it.

"Aren't we here to play Diamondback?" Fenris complained after a while. He hated the way Rhianna looked at Anders and seemed to be angrier than usual.

"Relax, Liri, we're here to play," Anders sat on the chair that was furthest from the elf, while the rest took their places as well.

"I'm not – I wish you would stop calling me that!" Fenris snarled at Anders.

Fenris's words caused Anders to snicker and he turned his attention to Varric, who was dealing the cards.

"Another feline slave, I see?" Velanna spoke up, all eyes on her as she smiled sarcastically at Anders.

"He's a _pet_, not a slave," Anders sighed. "Really Justice? This is getting so old!"

Velanna shrugged as she watched the card game with a bored expression on her face.

"The gangs have started to attack people on the streets," Rhianna told everyone in a low voice as she arranged her cards. "I hope to take care of that soon. Anyone up for a nightly romp until they are properly stopped?"

"Count me in," Fenris quickly said as he took a card from the deck. "Pass," he called out in a bored voice, tossing one card on the table.

"It should be fun," Isabela chimed in with a thoughtful expression as she looked at her cards. "I'll go, too."

"Do you have to ask?" Varric said with a smile. "You know you can always count on me, Hawke."

Rhianna gave Varric a huge smile and turned back to her cards.

"I'm out," Aveline sighed as she tossed all her cards on the table. "It was a horrid hand." She turned to Rhianna and shook her head. "I don't think I'll help this time around, Hawke. I'm too busy – "

"Putting together next week's wedding?" Anders supplied with a grin.

Aveline turned to glare at the blonde mage and he smirked.

"You know there isn't much to do," Rhianna smiled at the ginger guard. "I'm offering you the mansion for the wedding party afterwards.

Aveline smiled back at her friend gratefully.

"I'll help with the gangs," Velanna interrupted, sipping some ale from the mug in her hands, her brow furrowed.

Everyone sitting at the table turned to gape at the elven mage. Even Merrill.

Velanna's blue eyes went around the table, puzzled at the intense looks on her.

"Why are you people staring at me like idiots?" she demanded.

"Oh, nothing at all," Anders hurried to say. "We – we…"

"Aren't sure you mean it?" Rhianna finished off for Anders hopefully, the shock on her face causing a rusty smile to appear on Velanna's.

"Oh, I mean it. It will give me a chance to practice my magic," she offered nonplussed.

The image of thugs and thieves enveloped in fire and burning to death immediately came to Anders's mind and he smiled weakly at Velanna.

Fenris made a noise that sounded like a growl as he narrowed his eyes at Velanna, but she just ignored him, keeping her eyes on Hawke.

"Um, thanks, Velanna," Rhianna managed to nod at the elven mage. "We'll meet at my house tomorrow at dusk."

Everyone nodded or grunted their agreement, turning back to the cards silently. Anders was certain that the card game was not what they were thinking about at the moment.

…

Fenris arrived at Hawke's mansion for his daily reading lesson with Hawke with a worried frown. Bodahn told him Rhianna was waiting in the library and he nodded and headed over to the large room silently.

"Hello, Fenris!" Rhianna greeted him with a wide smile.

"Hello," he replied as he sat at the small table and chair opposite Hawke.

Anders walked into the room. "I'm heading to the clinic, love," he smiled, nodding at Fenris who gave him a curt nod back. "Anything you want me to bring back home?"

"No, my love. Are you taking Whiskers with you?" Rhianna grinned.

"Of course!" Anders smiled back as the kitten mewed from his shoulder, peeking around to look at Rhianna solemnly.

Rhianna laughed and Anders bent down to give her a goodbye kiss, then headed off towards the door that led to the cellars. "I'll be back early –well before the wedding and the party."

"You'd better!" Rhianna chuckled.

Fenris squirmed in his chair, a worried frown on his face.

"What's wrong, Fenris?" Rhianna asked gently.

"I'm waiting for something, and I don't like to wait," he said uncomfortably. "Let's just get on with the lesson."

"Can I help?" Rhianna offered, but Fenris shook his head and then gave her a smile.

"Nobody can help until I receive some news," he added. "Let's just focus on this, shall we?"

"All right then," she replied as she opened a page of the book she had chosen, while Fenris focused at the words before him.

After a while, Bodahn hurried into the room.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, Messere Hawke, but there's a man who is at the door that wants to speak to you about tonight."

"Sorry, Fenris, but as you know Aveline and Donnic are getting married today. I have to speak to this man."

"I understand, Hawke." Fenris said. "Perhaps we should do this tomorrow?"

"No, it's just him and then we can finish the lesson in peace," Hawke smiled back. "The preparations start in the afternoon and it's still very early in the morning, so we have time for this."

Fenris smiled back at her gratefully and watched her leave the room. He forced himself to focus on the book and the words he was looking at while she was gone, but after a few moments just sighed and looked towards the only window in the room, worrying again if what he had just done was the right course of action. A number of 'what-ifs' popped into his head as he worried, but it was too late for that. He had already sent off the letter and could only hope that everything would be all right.

…

Aveline's wedding took place in the Chantry, with the Grand Cleric herself marrying the couple. Donnic looked happily at Aveline with a loving expression on his face throughout the wedding.

The party was held at Rhianna's estate and when the guests arrived, they were ushered into a huge room, which had once been the ballroom of the mansion. It had been properly cleaned and dusted, the cobwebs and grime of years now gone. The polished stone floor gleamed in the brightly lit room, the lanterns and candled chandeliers burning steadily – the fire in the huge fireplace on the west wall of the room cackling merrily. Long tables placed against two of the walls in the room were full of food and different bottles of wine and ale, while different servants wandered around carrying silver plates full of pastries, sweetmeats and other delicacies.

Anders drifted from group to group, greeting everyone with a smile or a handshake with Rhianna by his side. She looked stunning in her deep red, tightly fitted, low-cut gown, which showed off her small waist and ample breasts. Anders had been struck dumb when he had first seen her. The thought of her on his arm made him puff out his chest a bit, proud to see the admiring looks that they threw in her direction.

Fenris had chosen to watch from the fireplace, his deep green eyes flickering longingly at Hawke from time to time. Isabela was wearing a blue dress that Rhianna had lent her and even Merrill showed up with Velanna, who looked mildly interested from time to time and was now smiling at something that Merrill was saying. The other guests, all guardsmen and women, chatted happily with each other and watched as the newlyweds prepared for the first dance.

Everyone applauded as Donnic and Aveline twirled around the polished floor and Rhianna stared up at Anders, who looked very handsome in a dark brown coat over a new white shirt and matching dark brown breeches. The bride and groom finished their dance and everyone burst into a hearty applause. Anders turned to Rhianna with an alluring smile.

"Would you do me the honor, my Lady?" he crooned as the musicians struck the chords to the next song. His warm brown eyes sparkled happily as he held out his hand, bowing to her slightly with a carefree expression on his face.

Rhianna took his hand with a laugh, her cheeks a bright pink as they walked to the center of the room and began to dance, while the rest looked on. Soon more people joined in and started dancing happily around the room.

"You dance so well," Rhianna commented. "You never told me how you learned."

"During one of my escapes, a nobleman in the Bannorn took me in. He held dances for the people and I was taught how to dance," Anders chuckled.

"Did you stay there for long?"

Anders shook his head. "Not very long, no. But it was long enough to learn how to dance," he replied with a smile. "When the templars caught me to take me back to the tower, I went without a complaint. The Bann's daughter had her eye on me and I wanted my freedom, so you could say I went back to the Circle quite gladly."

"You heartbreaker," Rhianna teased.

"I never wanted to fall in love while I was in the Circle. The templars could use that information to harm you or your lover, you know. I understood, as all circle mages do, that love wasn't for me." He sounded rather wistful, so Rhianna poked his side playfully, causing him to fall out of step, which elicited a laugh from him.

Donnic and Aveline danced past them laughing and Anders grinned. The dance ended and they clapped along with the rest, moving away from the dance floor and towards the double doors of the ballroom.

"They look happy, don't they?" Rhianna laughed, her eyes still fixed on Aveline and Donnic.

"They do," Anders replied with a smile. His brow suddenly furrowed as he searched her face for an answer to an unasked question and Rhianna blinked back, confused at what she was seeing.

"What is it?" she hurried to say. Anders didn't reply immediately, but took his time. One of the servants passed by and Rhianna took two glasses of wine from the tray for them to sip on.

"I – oh, I'm just wondering what you think of marriage," Anders finally blurted out after drinking most of the wine in his glass.

"Marriage?" Rhianna echoed, her eyes wide with surprise. "I haven't really thought of it, to be honest."

Anders nodded, a thoughtful expression on his face, and Rhianna smiled. "With the right person, it would work, wouldn't it?"

"Oh, yes," Anders agreed, his eyes suddenly twinkling. "Undoubtedly."

"Are you asking me what I think of marriage or are you asking me if I would like to get married?" Rhianna said in a rush. She had always been brutally honest, so he wasn't at all surprised at her question.

Even so, he blushed slightly and kept his eyes downcast. "I _am_ a mage, you know. _And_ a Grey Warden fugitive. What could I offer you?"

Rhianna smiled tenderly at her lover. "Oh, I don't know," she said after a moment of awkward silence. "Love?"

Anders's eyes flickered back to her, the thumping in his heart suddenly increasing in volume. "You know you have my love. Unconditionally and eternally."

The look in his eyes made her smile and she took a sip of wine from her glass, pausing for a short while to think about her answer.

"It seemed to be enough for my mother when she married my father," Rhianna observed. "Why shouldn't it be enough for me?"

Anders laughed. "Your father didn't run away from the Grey Wardens."

"True," Rhianna supplied, her smile gone. "But he did run away from the circle."

"We have that in common, I know," Anders nodded. She was looking up at him – the concern in her eyes was not lost to him.

"Do you think they'll come looking for you anytime soon to take you back?"

He shook his head, his eyes still fixed on hers. "I don't think they ever will. But I _am_ a warden. That will never change, even if I _want_ it to change."

The light in his eyes was gone now, and his serious demeanor seemed out of place and foreign to Rhianna. She didn't say anything, however, but did close the distance between them, putting an arm around his waist and standing on her toes to kiss him tenderly on the cheek.

"Let's not talk about this right now," she whispered into his ear. "It's bad luck for the newlyweds and we're together, aren't we?" she gave his hand a comforting squeeze.

"You're right," Anders said with a smile. "Let's go get something to drink and eat, love."

But as they walked towards one of the tables, Rhianna didn't fail to notice a sad look flicker for a moment in his eyes and her heart wrenched painfully inside her chest when she did.

…


	20. Chapter 20

_**Thank you so much Violet Enigma, Alexandrine Jennings, Apollo Wings, anesor and Morninglight for your awesome reviews! I also want to thank my lovely beta Eynla for her help! **_

_**Special thanks to my friend Apollo Wings who is helping me out with some research for the next chapter/s. I urge those of you who haven't read her fic 'The Daughter of the Mountain' to please do so – she's created her own OC, and Origin, and weaved a delightful fic of our heroes battling the Blight! It also has interesting information on the Avvar, which I am also researching for future chapters. I suck at links here, so if it doesn't work for you, check out my favorites list for the link to her story! (No spaces in between when you copy it to your browser!)**_

_** www . fan fiction s / 9647117 / 1 / The –Daughter –Of – The - Mountain **_

_**This chapter has a smexy scene right after the first break, so fair warning! NSFW! Also, this chapter contains spoilers for the Mark of the Assassin DLC! You have been warned! **_

_**My disclaimer as always: Bioware owns everything!**_

Chapter 20

Rhianna tossed and turned in bed, painfully aware of the fact that Anders's side of the bed was empty. She sighed as she looked up at the top of her four-poster bed and sat up, a frown on her face.

Ever since Aveline's wedding – nearly two weeks ago, Anders had been coming home to bed very late, or not coming to bed at all. She went through the whole wedding again in her mind, analyzing the serious conversation they had had. While she had been surprised at his awkward proposal, she wasn't at all against it. In fact, she had felt a thrill when she imagined what marriage life would be like next to this amazing man, who also happened to be handsome and very good with his hands.

She missed him. They had not been intimate for a while, but it wasn't only that. She missed his smiles and jokes, and his crooning softly to his cat, while she sat at her desk checking the missives that arrived after a long day of battling evil. She missed the way he smiled at her, that slow, lopsided smile when they were alone or when she wore something sexy, or nothing at all. She missed the look in his warm, brown eyes when she asked him to join her in the huge tub for a bath. She missed the sparks that flowed from his fingertips every now and then when they made love. Above all, she missed _him_. All the perfections and imperfections that made up the wonderful man he was.

She stood up and began to pace the room, but threw her hands up into the air after a while, deciding not to think about it if she could help it. Instead, she put on a robe and opened the door to her room, then padded down the stairs to the foyer to look at the correspondence on the desk, since she had failed to do so earlier that evening.

She sighed wearily when she saw another half a dozen invitations to parties and rolled her eyes at each of the nobles' missives to her. A noise in the library made her turn and promptly walk to the library door, then stop at the threshold, suppressing a sigh at what she saw.

Anders had fallen asleep on the desk there, knocking over a book in the process. Whiskers was licking himself and looked up at Rhianna seriously, causing her to smile slightly, but her eyes darted back to her lover, who was sound asleep with his head and arms on the desk.

Very quietly, she picked up the book and looked at the title. _Herbalism in the Tevinter Imperium_ by Senior Enchanter Ines of Kinloch Hold.

No wonder he had fallen asleep.

Setting the book on the desk, she looked down at him, and smiled tenderly. She was debating on whether or not she should wake him, but decided against it. She could see the dark circles under his eyes and knew he hadn't been getting enough sleep. Turning around, she tiptoed to the door again to leave the room, but a groan escaped his lips and she whirled around to face him.

"No!" he said in his sleep, followed by a heartbreaking sigh. She frowned. If he was having a nightmare then…

She walked up to him again with a determined look on her face, and shook him gently.

"Anders?"

He woke instantly, as she knew he would – he was a healer after all and probably used to waking up in the wee hours of the morning if a patient needed him.

"Love!" he exclaimed, stretching and yawning. Ser Whiskers jumped up on the desk, and he smiled at the cat, then his gaze fell on her and his smile deepened. "What are you doing out of bed?"

"I couldn't sleep," she replied with a smile, her eyes fixed on his.

"I could read you a bedtime story," he suggested in his usual flamboyant style as he waggled his eyebrows at her. She laughed, happy that her Anders was apparently back.

"Or do something else, maybe?" she suggested seductively.

His smile suddenly vanished as soon as he heard those words and she frowned as he stood up rather quickly, picking up the volume of herbalism from the desk.

"What time is it, anyway?" he asked as he glanced at the window across the room.

Rhianna took two steps and stood before him, suddenly angry at what was happening.

"Anders, you've been avoiding me, why?" she demanded.

"Don't be ridiculous, love, why would I –"

"Spare me the stupid, patronizing words you are about to say," she countered, her eyes flashing at him.

He shook his head, his eyes sad beyond measure as he looked at her. "I'm not trying to be patronizing, love."

"I want to know _why_," she shot back undeterred, her anger dissolving almost instantly when she saw the sadness in his eyes.

He sighed then, shaking his head with a miserable look that caused her to fling her arms around him in a tight embrace, her heart in pain over what was happening.

He hugged her back, but did not speak for a while. "I'm having a hard time at the clinic, love," he murmured finally. There's been an outbreak of a strange illness and I've been working all night sometimes. I'm sorry if I've been away."

His explanation made some sense, considering the book he had been reading when he had fallen asleep, but she still couldn't shake the feeling that he was holding back and avoiding to say something else to her. He broke the embrace and looked into her eyes pleadingly and she melted in his arms.

"I understand," she managed to whisper.

"I'm here because I remembered I had a volume on herbalism that I wanted to check out to see if I could come up with another potion that would help my patients," he said earnestly, leaning in slightly to capture her lips in a kiss.

The kiss was passionate and a little demanding on her part, even if she didn't want it to be. Two weeks was a long time. The book fell to the floor as a moan escaped his lips and she felt his erection immediately, which almost put her mind at ease.

Almost.

He broke away from the kiss and her embrace, picking up the book from the floor and putting it into his pack, which had been lying against the desk, then turned to her again. "I have to return. I've got all my cots with patients who need me, love."

She nodded. "Do you need any help?"

"Oh, no!" he quickly said, his eyes widening slightly. "I wouldn't want you to catch whatever it is they have. Not until I come up with a better cure, at least."

He embraced her again, and turned away, heading towards the cellar door. "I'll be back later."

His exit was so quick, he forgot about Ser Whiskers, leaving him behind with Rhianna. The cat looked at the cellar door in utter disbelief and then looked up at her, totally astonished that Anders would such a thing.

"I agree, Whiskers," she said picking up the cat and petting him. "We'll have to get to the bottom of this, won't we?"

"Mew!" the cat agreed wholeheartedly.

…

Anders sighed at the empty clinic, dragging his feet on the floor to the desk where he kept his potions. He hated himself, not only because he had lied to Rhianna, but because he could not still the beating of his heart, nor calm his throbbing erection. He shook his head, and then wondered if he was somehow insane to have left his beautiful lover standing in the library after having shared a kiss that had left him – and her if he could venture a guess – so painfully aroused.

That kiss! _Maker_! His hand unwillingly traveled to the bulge in his breeches, and he stood up quickly as he made his way to the tiny back room inside. Flinging himself on the cot, he undid the laces on his breeches and wrapped his hand around his throbbing arousal, a moan escaping his lips. He quickly envisioned Rhianna above him and stroked himself, hissing through clenched teeth as he picked up a rhythm.

He imagined her smiling down at him and touching herself, mewling with pleasure as she moved up and down, her gasps echoing in his mind. He let out a groan that filled the tiny room, his hand moving up and down his shaft faster as he picked up the pace. In his mind's eye, he saw one of her hands now moving down to her clit, and she massaged it wildly with an animalistic growl escaping her lips. The cry that escaped his lips when he finally came turned into a whimper immediately afterwards.

He took a deep breath and opened his eyes, reaching under the pillow where he kept a cloth, then cleaned himself. Flinging the cloth on the floor, he settled back on the cot, but a hiss made him sit back up again and look around. Ser Whiskers was sitting on one of the crates and staring at him with disdain.

He adjusted himself and tied up the laces of his breeches quickly, remembering with dismay that he had left the cat behind with Rhianna at the estate – knowing very well that Ser Whiskers never left the house on his own, unless he or Rhianna was with him. Getting up, he ran to the next room and looked around, his eyes nearly bulging out of his sockets as he desperately thought of something to say to her.

The clinic was empty.

He walked to the entrance next– he'd left the door wide open – and peered into the darkness, hoping to catch a glimpse of her, but he saw only shadows. The sinking sensation he was feeling dropped all the way to the bottom of his stomach when he understood what that meant.

"Fuck!" he said sadly in a whisper. Turning around, he walked back into the clinic, his eyes falling on the cat that was now sitting on his desk, gazing at him with an accusatory glance.

"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!"

…

He finally dragged his feet through the cellar the following day in the evening, dreading to face her, but knowing he could not avoid it any longer. Ser Whiskers meowed from his shoulder and he sadly petted his cat when he reached the stairs that led to the door of the estate.

Sighing, he took out his key and unlocked the door, stepping into the library. He looked around and heard Rhianna in the foyer talking to Varric. Making his way to the foyer, he braced himself for the inevitable.

Varric said 'hello' cheerfully to him and Rhianna turned to face him, her eyes devoid of emotion as she gazed directly into his. Anders felt his cheeks turn pink and he forced himself to smile.

"What are you doing here, Varric?" he asked pleasantly, feeling slightly faint as Rhianna regarded him coolly.

"You didn't know?" Varric replied, looking mildly surprised and turning to inspect Rhianna who was still smiling fixedly at Anders. Varric immediately realized he found himself in the middle of something and once again cursed silently for not bringing his journal and quill to write everything down.

"Anders has been too busy, lately," Rhianna supplied sweetly. "There's been a terrible outbreak of a strange sickness in Darktown. Isn't that right, my love?"

Anders faltered, his smile slowly dwindling down to nothing.

"Really?" Varric said interestedly. "How strange! I've heard nothing about that." The dwarf smiled at the couple, enjoying himself wholeheartedly.

"Varric is staying for dinner with us, Fenris should be here shortly. I invited them both over, since we'll be going to the square all together. We're supposed to meet his friend Edge there," Rhianna explained, still in the same sweet voice.

"Oh!" Anders quickly interjected, running his tongue along his lower lip nervously. "Having them over for dinner is a wonderful idea, love!" Ser Whiskers mewed from his shoulder and Anders hastily set the cat on the floor. "I'll go feed Whiskers, then, and – " he paused, avoiding Rhianna's eyes – "meet you all at the dining table."

"Of course," Rhianna said in the same sing-song voice.

_Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit!_

Anders quickly fled the room, with Ser Whiskers close behind, and did not stop until he got to the kitchen. He heard the knock on the front door and he knew it was Fenris, so he fed his cat as quickly as he could in order to head back to the dining room.

"I didn't know you were coming to dinner, Master!" Orana exclaimed as she entered the kitchen, gasping at the implications. "I'll have to set a place for you!" She hurried out to the table and Anders pulled himself together the best he could as he followed her into the room with a wooden smile on his face, sweating profusely.

Varric and Rhianna smiled up him for a few seconds and Fenris frowned. He noticed that Fenris was sitting at the head of the table, which was _his_ place. Even though he knew it was merely because of what had happened, it didn't stop the pang of jealousy he felt. He made his way around the chairs and sat next to Varric, his smile still in place.

They waited until Orana had finished putting the silverware and a plate in front of him, along with a glass for wine and left. Anders chanced a look at Fenris, who was smirking at him and scowled.

"I hope it doesn't rain. I hate it when it rains in the middle of a mission," Rhianna said to no one in particular as Orana entered the room again, carrying a big tray with a roast, with steaming vegetables all around it. Sandal also made an appearance, carrying another tray with roasted potatoes. They set the food down and Rhianna first served Fenris a plate and then Varric, while Anders glared at his empty dish for a few moments and Varric smiled.

Everyone else had already started eating, so Anders took the tray of potatoes first and served himself, then the roast – piling a few slices on his plate along with some vegetables. He then poured himself some wine. He finally began to eat, keeping quiet and avoiding everyone at the table on purpose – even Varric.

Rhianna chatted with Fenris the whole meal, while Varric attempted to talk to Anders, who glared at Fenris and Rhianna instead.

"Did you cook this meal, Hawke?" Fenris asked when they finished.

"I did. I cook from time to time, although Orana can cook very well and helps me a lot when I'm in the kitchen with her. I like cooking, actually," Rhianna laughed.

"It was delicious," Fenris smiled at her.

Anders nearly snarled into his wine and ended up coughing. Fenris smirked at him and he glared back.

"Well, let's all go to the library and have some more wine," Rhianna said as she stood up, oblivious to what had just happened. "We still have an hour to kill."

Anders stood up and waited for Varric and Fenris to exit the room. He grabbed Rhianna's arm before she even reached the door.

"I'm sorry, love," he whispered. "I didn't mean to lie to you, I really didn't. I just – I'm going through something and –"

Rhianna looked up at him, her eyes smoldering, then looked down at his hand on her arm. "Let me go," she said in a soft voice.

Anders blinked back, releasing her. His frown turned into a pout. "I'm sorry!"

"I'm sorry, too, Anders," she replied in a tired voice. "I'm sorry that you don't love me enough to trust me…"

"I _do_ trust you!" he protested vehemently.

"If that's trust, then I obviously am wrong about seeing you pleasuring yourself in your clinic last night as well," she replied frostily, her eyes flashing angrily at him.

"I can't give you the life you should have!" Anders blurted out, the tears threatening to fall. "As a Grey Warden, I'm doomed to live a short life – a little over twenty years now as a matter of fact!"

Rhianna's eyes widened and she stared at him, unable to utter a word.

"Messere?" Bodahn said in a soft voice, interrupting them. "Master Varric asks if you two are coming."

Rhianna drew a breath in and exhaled slowly. She nodded to Bodahn, and turned back to Anders. "We'll be there right away, Bodahn," she said softly, looking up at her lover.

"Nothing excuses the fact that you lied to me, love," she said sadly to Anders when Bodahn had left. "Varric and Fenris are waiting for us in the library. We'll talk about this later."

…

The square was empty.

Rhianna turned to Varric, a frown on her face as she regarded the dwarf silently.

"And, of course, there's no one," she waved to the empty space around them.

"I don't understand!" Varric said shaking his head. "Edge was very specific about it all in his message!"

"This is usually when we're ambushed," Fenris shook his head, his eyes darting around the empty market square.

"Why does it always have to be about an ambush with you?" Varric sighed.

At that very moment, some men dropped down from the alcoves above and at least a dozen ran forward from the other square with bows, aiming directly at them. Two others approached them from the shadows behind the stalls; one of them, who looked like the leader, planted himself directly in front of the group with a sardonic smile on his face.

"Okay," Varric sighed again. "Sometimes it _is_ about an ambush."

"Ah! The Champion of Kirkwall!" The man jeered. "The Crows send their greetings! You will die here tonight!"

Before they could unsheathe their weapons to face them, there was a commotion on the roof and Rhianna saw a knife fly through the air and land on the neck of one of the archers, making him grasp at his throat and fall to the stone ground right at their feet. In a few seconds, mayhem broke around them as a redheaded elf suddenly made an appearance, killing two others with knives she flung at them. She then slashed at one of the men closest to her, using him as a shield as she dropped down to where Rhianna and her group were standing. Tumbling gracefully to the ground in a somersault, she got up and ran to the man that had threatened Hawke, pausing for a moment to wink at him, and then slashed his throat as well. She whirled around to face Hawke and said, "Well? What are you waiting for?"

Then, all hell broke loose.

…

The fight was not as difficult as it could have been, but Hawke was exceedingly annoyed.

"Who the blazes is that?" she yelled at Varric who flung a rain of arrows at the nearest group of crow assassins in order to slow them down.

"Don't know, don't care!" Varric called out, now firing at the group of archers. "Kill now, ask questions later!"

Fenris jumped in the air and delivered his deadly blow at the assassins, and Hawke managed to appear behind one of them and slash his throat while she kicked the other one, who suddenly disappeared after throwing a smoke bomb. Rhianna cursed, then hurriedly warned Fenris, who nodded as he ran forward to lash out at the next thug. She herself hurled a smoke bomb and ran off to the archers, while Anders flung a tempest at all the rest.

The redhead, in the meantime, had managed to kill three more and fatally wound another one, which Rhianna took care of quickly. She smiled at Rhianna and ran past her, onto the other group of six that had suddenly appeared.

Rhianna leapt forward, and tossed a combustion grenade as a welcoming gift to the newcomers, grinning as she watched their black leather chest pieces melt from the intensity of the fire. She laughed when they cried out, and moved in lithely to finish them off. She then hurried over to the remaining archers and quickly slashed at the ones Anders had frozen, while Fenris rushed in to help.

The fight ended and Rhianna turned to look at the redhead, a slow smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

"That was some entrance," she purred. "You've got some good moves."

"I do, don't I?" The redhead elf grinned, walking up to Rhianna with a smile on her face.

Anders stepped up right next to Rhianna, his brow furrowed as he regarded the elf, his eyes narrowing.

"You're not even suspicious about how she just 'happened' to jump in just as we were ambushed by a large group of crows?" he nearly growled in an aside to Rhianna.

"I didn't have anything to do with this attack," the redhead said defensively.

"I'm not saying you did," Anders shot back at her, his eyes flashing angrily for a few seconds.

"I'm pretty sure she isn't a templar, Anders," Rhianna quipped, without taking her eyes off the elf.

"My name is Tallis," the elf said, graciously taking a bow before Rhianna. "And I came here looking for you."

Anders's frown deepened, the jealousy he was feeling making him angrier than he had felt in a while. He stared at the elf and at Rhianna, scowling as he tried to get a grip on himself and managing to – barely.

Varric chuckled as he observed the whole scene before him.

"And here I thought we were going to spend a boring evening listening to Edge talk about nobles!"

…


	21. Chapter 21

_**There's a very important reason the Mark of the Assassin DLC is featured in this fic. I won't spoil you all by telling you what it is; you'll just have to read on. I'm trying to make the whole thing as entertaining as possible and I realize that not many people like Tallis, so I'll try not to write about her much! :P **_

_**Wow! I LOVED reading your reviews! Thanks so much anesor, Violet Enigma, Pintsizedpsycho, Alexandrine Jennings, Eilonwycousland, Morninglight and Apollo Wings for your awesome feedback! I also want to thank those of you who have put this fic on their list of favorites and are now following it! You can't imagine how much all this means to me! Love you all! :D **_

_**Special thanks to my lovely beta CouslandSpitFire, who takes the time from her very busy schedule to help me out! I also want to thank my wonderful friend Apollo Wings for her help and suggestions! You totally rock! **_

_**There is mature content in this chapter right after the first break! So, fair warning: NSFW! **_

_**My disclaimer as always: Bioware owns everything! I just play with the characters! :D **_

Chapter 21

"You were looking for me specifically?" Rhianna asked, her eyes narrowing suspiciously. "Why?"

"I was looking for the woman who has an invitation to Duke Prosper's hunting party," Tallis said with a smile.

"Oh, _that's_ what Edge was going on about! Don't you remember, Hawke?" Rhianna turned her attention on Varric and what he was saying. "Duke Prosper was one of the nobles falling all over you during the banquet given to celebrate your title!"

"Hunting party?" Rhianna echoed, the memory of Duke Prosper suddenly making her scowl. "I doubt I'd go to one of those!"

"I was hoping you'd reconsider. The duke is really delightful as a host," Tallis smiled.

"You mean there's something else, right? I hardly think anyone can say he's delightful at all," Rhianna snorted.

"I need to relieve him of something he has but shouldn't have, and I can't do it on my own," Tallis nodded. "A jewel, to be more precise."

"You want to rob him?" Rhianna understood, her words tumbling out with a sly smile.

"Ha!" Varric interrupted with a grin. "Stealing from Orlesians? If Isabela was here she'd burst out laughing!"

Anders chuckled and even Fenris smiled as they envisioned Isabela's reaction.

"She'd probably do a little dance afterwards, too!" Rhianna agreed with a laugh.

"You came to our aid," Anders commented, looking directly into the elf's eyes. "And I don't think it's just because you want to steal a jewel. What's the catch? There's always a catch."

"Well," Tallis said, walking closer to Hawke and standing directly in front of her. "This isn't exactly how I was planning to ask you. I was picturing an introduction with…less blood."

Rhianna smiled her slow smile, the one she only gave Anders, and Anders was taken aback. His eyes widened slightly and almost immediately, he felt the pang of jealousy start at the bottom of his stomach and work its way up.

"I imagine if we did this…it would be together, wouldn't it?" Rhianna purred at the redhead.

The elven redhead smiled prettily at Hawke. "That's the idea. Did you have…something else in mind?"

"I _am_ standing right here, aren't I? Or did I suddenly disappear in a flash of lightning?" Anders growled with a scowl.

Rhianna ignored him completely and Varric chuckled at her next words.

"I just think we should get to know each other better!"

"I think I'd like that," Tallis smiled, arching her eyebrows expressively.

Varric glanced back at Anders's face, which looked like a small thunderstorm at the moment, and smirked. The trip to Chateau Haine was going to be very entertaining indeed.

They first made a stop at Rhianna's, as she wanted to pack a few things for the journey and later made a stop at The Hanged Man, where Varric could pack as well. Soon, they were on the road. Tallis and Rhianna chatted, taking the lead. Varric, Anders and Fenris trailed quietly behind. Varric had a huge smile on his face as his keen eyes observed and took in minute details.

This time he had finally remembered to pack his journal and quill.

…

Even though they were travelling to the mountains, Chateau Haine was on the border with Orlais. Tallis explained that they would be stealing a jewel called 'The Heart of the Many'. She also described what Chateau Haine was like: an impenetrable fortress designed to keep anyone out. It had been used as a stronghold by the Grey Wardens during the Fourth Blight as a matter of fact. On top of it all, there were monsters called wyverns in the hunting grounds surrounding the Chateau. The whole event they would soon be attending was actually a Wyvern hunt.

They stopped to camp in the Vinmark Mountains at dusk, a spring bubbling close to their camp. Tallis, Fenris and Rhianna went hunting for dinner, while Anders stayed behind to build the fire with Varric and help set up the tents.

"You feeling alright, Blondie?" Varric asked, breaking the silence between them. "You don't look yourself at the moment."

"I'm fine," Anders said through clenched teeth as he pounded the stake in front of him with more force than necessary.

"Doesn't look like it from where I'm standing," Varric smiled, a twinkle in his eye.

Anders grunted and shrugged. Two tents were finally put up and he focused on gathering wood for the fire. Varric stepped next to him doing the same.

"I miss Rhianna," Anders finally confessed with a pout. "I know she's flirting with Tallis to get back at me, but I still can't help myself and get overly-jealous."

"I noticed," Varric grinned. "Trust me, she'll come around."

Anders shook his head sadly, sitting in front of the now cackling fire. It was almost dark and getting chilly already. "I don't think she will. I lied to her, you know."

"You were trying to keep something from her that could hurt her," Varric commented with a shrug. "Not a very good idea…considering what a terrible liar you are, Blondie."

"Thanks for that," Anders scowled.

Rhianna, Tallis and Fenris arrived, chatting and smiling. They had successfully hunted and caught several rabbits, so they got busy skinning and preparing them for dinner. Tallis had also found several vegetables that needed to be prepared. Anders kept his eyes on Rhianna as they cooked. Rhianna, however, continued to flirt and ignored him completely, even when they finally sat around the fire to eat.

Anders sighed to himself when dinner was done, but that didn't mean he was giving up. When Rhianna headed off to wash herself in the nearby spring, he followed. She heard him coming and turned to face him, her eyes glinting in the half-light.

"I want to bathe, Anders. What do you want?"

"I want to bathe with you," he replied without thinking, his cheekiness manifesting as it usually did in tense situations.

She shook her head with a smile. "You really _are_ persistent, aren't you?"

"I've been called worse," he smiled back at her.

"I'm hurt," she shot back. "I'm not going to lie to you, even though _you_ chose to do so."

"I was keeping the truth from you, because I wanted to protect you. It's ugly, Rhianna. I don't want your life to be ugly any more. You deserve happiness, not more sadness in life," Anders said quietly.

"So, you're going to try to cut me out of your life, then? So that I can find someone else to love?" Rhianna asked.

"Maybe you should," Anders answered sadly.

"You honestly believe that?" Rhianna shook her head, her eyes widening with disbelief. She walked over to where Anders was standing and looked up into his eyes.

"I don't," he finally whispered. "I couldn't live without you."

"Then stop acting like such a fool," she said, her eyes flashing angrily.

He pulled her to him without warning, his lips on hers as he kissed her with passion, his hands travelling restlessly up and down her back. She responded to the kiss, her hands on the nape of his neck, her fingers suddenly threading through his hair, releasing it from his tie. Their tongues fought for dominance and she hummed into his lips, feeling herself melt from the heat of the kiss.

Eventually they both came up for air, and he placed his forehead against hers, panting softly.

"Please say you'll forgive me."

"I don't know," she replied. "You'll have to do a lot before I can."

"Then I'd better get started," Anders whispered with a smile as he kissed her again. "Life's too short!"

Rhianna giggled into his mouth, then found herself kissing him back passionately. She had missed him. For someone like her who enjoyed the pleasure that sex brought, the past two weeks had been nothing short of torture. That and the fact that she loved him made her mewl with pleasure as he trailed kisses all the way to her ear, moan as he unbuckled her leathers with deft hands, sigh as he fumbled with the ties that held his coat and breeches together.

He brought her down to the sandy ground on top of him, once they were rid of their offensive clothes, and she teased him by rubbing her clit against his cock. He groaned as he pulled her close, looking up at her with something akin to wonder in his eyes. He still could not believe that she was in his arms right now, looking so very gorgeous as she kissed him over and over.

"I can't hold on much longer, love," he whispered urgently in her ear. "It's been too long!"

She agreed silently and positioned herself on top of him, sliding onto his engorged erection, moaning as she felt the heat coursing through her blood. He brought her closer down and captured her lips, his hands restless, settling on her buttocks and squeezing gently.

She straightened up again, and slowly began to move. His hands were now reaching for her breasts – a growl escaped her lips as he massaged them roughly, the urgency in his caress not lost on her as she quickened her pace. They had been apart far too long to do this gently and tenderly. There would be time for that later.

He sat up, holding her in place for a few moments as he tried to control himself, but she shook her head, breathing heavily as she continued her quickened pace. He matched her rhythm as best he could and let go after a short while – nearing his release as she tightened even more around him.

"I can't – oh, love!" he whimpered, his hands now digging into her hips, the heat he was feeling travelling all the way to his chest and head as he finally came, his seed shooting deeply inside her. She convulsed and tightened around his arousal, following him over the brink closely, unable to contain herself any longer.

She slumped over him, breathing heavily and he held her close, gasping for breath himself, still inside her.

"I missed you…so much!" she murmured finally as she tried to catch her breath.

"I love you," he whispered, kissing her forehead gently – his eyes twinkling like stars, catching the light of the full moon. He smirked immediately afterwards. "How about that bath now?"

"Only if you bathe me," she replied, her slow smile making him kiss her again.

"Your wish is my command."

…

When they got back to the camp, Tallis was nowhere to be seen, but Fenris and Varric were sitting in front of the fire, having a drink. Varric had brought a bottle of wine with him and they were doing a good job of drinking it down while playing a game of Diamondback.

"Hey lovebirds," Varric called out with a grin. "You want to play a game with us and have a drink?"

"You _can't _be serious!" Rhianna said as she disentangled herself from Anders's arms and marched up to them, seething. She yanked the bottle from Fenris's hand and quickly turned to Varric who held up his hands in a defensive gesture. "You _know_ we have to set out early, we can't deal with hangovers tomorrow morning! Besides, we'll have to set up watch! We have no idea what's around, and I don't intend to be eaten by some…_wyvern_ that comes along! You _know_ we're really close to Chateau Haine!"

"All right! All right!" Varric protested, still holding out his hands. "I got the message!"

"We're sorry, Hawke," Fenris added. "You two were gone for hours. We…were bored. It was Varric's idea."

"Was not!" Varric shouted quickly.

Anders felt a mad desire to laugh, but bit the insides of his cheeks. As far as he was concerned, Rhianna and he were together again and he didn't want to tick her off.

"Don't you two understand that we are in a place that is foreign to us and therefore should be more alert?" Rhianna still scolded on.

"I understand that it's too bad that you and Blondie made up! Before, you didn't pay much attention to us, you focused entirely on him!"

"Where is Tallis?" Rhianna demanded, ignoring the comment Varric had just made.

"I think she is in her tent," Fenris pointed to another tent set up to the right of the camp.

"I am," the redhead's voice drifted up to them. "And I _had _successfully fallen asleep. Thanks for waking me up!"

"Sorry, Tallis," Rhianna called out contritely before turning back to Varric and Fenris, her eyes flashing angrily. "See what you've done? Get some sleep, both of you! Anders and I will take the first watch. We'll wake you up when it's your turn."

"Yes, mother," Varric mumbled as he went past Hawke and into the tent he shared with Fenris.

Anders just pulled Rhianna close as they sat in front of the fire, extremely grateful that for once, he had not been the object of her ire.

"So," Rhianna said in a low voice, keeping her eyes on the fire. "The Taint will eventually kill you?"

Anders sighed pulling her closer to him before he spoke. "Yes. It takes 30 years for it to spread. What happens then is that you begin to have nightmares. You start to...change. This is when the wardens send you to the Deep Roads."

"There is no cure?" Rhianna asked in a small voice.

"I'm sorry, love," Anders replied, his arms tightening slightly. "This is why I kept away from you. I was trying to...find the courage to -"

"Don't even say it!" Rhianna sat up, turning to look at him, her gaze stern and determined. "I won't let you go, Anders! And I refuse to believe there is no way to help you!"

Anders could only look at her and take her in his arms again, holding her as closely as he could, a lump in his throat as he battled against the tears that threatened to fall.

"I never give up," Rhianna said after a while. "You should know that by now."

…

When they arrived at Chateau Haine, Duke Prosper and his bodyguard, who happened to be a Chasind, greeted them personally. The Duke expressed extreme surprise in seeing them there, but Rhianna assured him that it was quite normal for her to find and kill things. The Duke burst out laughing at that comment and then turned to compliment Tallis. He then hurried on to say that he was pleased that Hawke had brought a manservant or two with her and Fenris bristled at this visibly.

When all was said and done, the group met a man who introduced himself as Gabriel, one of the Duke's personal stewards. He hurried to tell them that the Wyvern's poison was fatal – leading to death in all cases.

"So people hunt these creatures just to go and die? That's comforting," Rhianna quipped.

Gabriel chuckled under his breath. "There _is_ a cure, Serah. Equal parts drakevein, Andraste's Mantle and winterberry are the ingredients necessary for the antidote."

"Thank you, kindly," Rhianna said earnestly. "Any other advice?"

"Try not to face the beasts. Flank them or blind them if you can, Serah," Gabriel cautioned.

Rhianna expressed her thanks again and they turned to head out to the wilderness. As soon as they were out of earshot, Fenris expressed his anger.

"Manservant!" he growled, making Anders snicker behind him.

"Shh!" Tallis warned. "It's only a cover!"

"I'd like to 'cover' him with six feet!" Fenris scowled.

"Technically, it would be '_elf_servant'," Varric joined in, trying to calm Fenris down. "But he specifically said 'man'."

"Let's just start our hunt," Rhianna commented, looking around.

"So, what do we do to get a wyvern to notice us?" Anders wondered. "Beat the bushes with sticks?"

"We could always run around and shout, 'Here, wyvern, wyvern, wyvern!'" Varric grinned.

"Honestly, you two, sometimes!" Rhianna shook her head with a smile. "It's like taking a couple of children out on a family outing for the first time!"

"Let's look for some bait so that we capture it sooner," Tallis advised. "I hope I don't have to say 'be careful' to any of you."

"I can speak for myself and say 'no'," Rhianna nodded. "But I really think you should mention it several times for Anders and Varric's sake."

"I resent that!" Varric scowled.

But Anders just laughed and stepped right beside Rhianna to embrace her.

…

Excerpt from Anders's journal:

_So now we're hunting a creature that can kill us with its poison. _

_We're sooo lucky. _

_I'm only writing because we've stopped for a while to rest and eat something. Also because I'd like to write something before I die:_

"_I, Anders of the Anderfels, solemnly bequeath all my worldly possessions to the love of my life, Rhianna Hawke, in case I die on this stupid hunt…"_

_Wait a minute! I don't have any worldly possessions! _

_Sigh._

_So far, we have found a lot of things that qualify as 'bait' to get the wyvern to come to us. I would prefer we just ignored the damned thing, but Rhianna and Tallis seem to think that we'll make a good impression on the Duke and the party will be more agreeable. Yes. Partying with a half dozen Orlesians chevaliers staring makes it __**so**__ agreeable! They carry mean weapons around and __**never**__ smile! And I thought __**templars**__ were scary! _

_Anyway, where was I? Ah, yes! The bait! We managed to find some wyvern blood along the way and Tallis had the great idea of bringing it with us. Her explanation was that wyverns fight each other and this blood could lure a wyvern to us, since wyverns had a strong sense of smell and apparently did a lot of fighting, especially during the mating season. And according to Tallis, they were always mating, which is why Duke Prosper organized Wyvern Hunts every year. _

_We fought some dragons and dragonlings shortly after collecting the blood. They must have smelled the wyvern blood we were taking with us. We managed to kill them all, but they nearly burned my coat off. Rhianna wanted to bring along a whole dragonling corpse, but I put my foot down on that one! There was NO WAY I was carrying one of those. They weigh a ton! So she settled for a leg instead, and we went along our merry way. _

_Then we discovered the ghasts. _

_To those of you who think darkspawn are the only nasty creatures in Thedas, think again. Ghasts are not only ugly and creepy, they are bloodthirsty. I imagine they collect the hunters that fall into their holes and eat them. They're small, but don't let that fool you. They will swarm around you faster than you can say 'Ghast!' and try to topple you down with their poisoned darts. _

_Afterwards, it takes forever to remove the stupid darts embedded in your body. Not fun!_

_Of course, we also ran into a man calling for his two dogs, and Rhianna assured him we would find them. We did find the dogs, but one of them was poisoned. Rhianna immediately brought out some of the antidote we had made and gave it to the poisoned dog. The dog got up afterwards and wagged its stumpy tail, perfectly fine. I managed to make more of the antidote after that. It didn't hurt to have as much as we could carry. The man who had been looking for his mabari hounds was so grateful to Rhianna, he gave her a gold sovereign while thanking her profusely, and then ran off towards the Chateau, with his dogs trailing behind. _

_Lucky bastard. _

_We also found some wyvern dung along the way. Rhianna put her hands in it, looking for more bait, and I took a step back. It smelled dreadful! She found some nug bones, and Tallis told us she could imitate a nug call to lure a wyvern to us. Rhianna took some soap from her pack, walking towards a lake that was next to a path that led to the north to wash up and we stopped for a few minutes to enjoy the scenery before us and have a snack. _

_So far, we hadn't seen a single wyvern – which to me clearly meant they were smarter than we were – but we did hear them mating further up one of the hills. Tallis listened carefully and told Rhianna she could imitate that, too. That really didn't surprise me, because Tallis struck me as the type who would do anything to get into the Chateau. And that made me feel a little bit uneasy. _

_When we found some halla remains and took some of the carcass with us to use as bait, I informed Rhianna that we simply couldn't carry anything else with us. I was very serious about the whole thing and used words like 'under no uncertain terms' and 'refuse', but Rhianna just smiled her slow smile at me and I felt myself melt. _

_Damn that woman and her wily, wily ways! She'll be the death of me for sure!_

…


End file.
